I am new to this board. I'm white my baby's daddy is black. This will be the first biracial baby in the family. my mom and step dad are ok with the baby being mixed (they are just overall dissapointed i'm pregnant) my brother makes fun of my unborn baby ("half and half" etc) my sister and my real dad aren't speaking to me, and no one else in the family knows this baby is mixed, and i'm not sure how some of them will react. This is very frustrating, I love this baby no matter what. And to top everything of my babys dad says it's not his and he doesn't speak to me anymore either. grrrrr.

OK Carmen,

Don't get upset, but why are you referring to your child as mixed? It is your child. The child will be classified by the world as black.

I have a biracial child and I refer to her as my child. Don't put labels on the baby. Just love it.

As for everyone else, who cares what they think! Either they will accept it or not, that has been an issue between black and white for ages in this country. Whites have always hated to mix the blood of blacks into their society.

Your family will have to learn to deal with it. However, if your father and sister are upset now, how did they react to you dating a black man in the first place? I am certain their reactions are not new.

Hi Carmen,

Im a single black father of a multiracial baby boy(native american,mexican and black). His race shouldnt define how much he is loved. Teach your baby from the begining that they are an individual and that their race shouldnt define who and what they are. Your family will learn to love your baby despite the browness of his or her skin, and if they dont their loss.

Carmen i know what you mean. Except it is my father that makes the remarks. He calls mixed kids "swirl babies" and says it in front of me knowing that he is going to have a mixed grandson in about 3 months. He asked me about 2 weeks ago.."What is wrong with this generation? All of yall are swirlin up!" I want so bad to say something to him but its not worth it. I don't want to put myself on his level. I just hope that when my son is born he can love him unconditionally. I would like him to be a good role model for my son since his father isn't really in the picture. But I know what youre going through.

My son is biracial i am white and his father is black.My parents like yous didnt care because of the fact i never dated a white boy before so they knew it was going to happen , but they were not happy i was pregnant.My grandparents on the other hand are old school they didnt accept it at first but once he was born they were so happy.sometimes it can be hard cuz people will look at me and my son(who doesnt even look white) like there is something wrong with me but i dont care.My son is my world.i hope everything goes okay for you when he is born, alot of people will change there veiws on the situation.you are very lucky to be raising a biracial child, they are sooooo beautiful.By the time our children have their children there will be soo many mixed children it wont even be an issue.Well good luck!if you need someone to talk to you can pm me.

Get a grip! I have a fifteen year old daughter, who just "is". There is no mixed, or biracial as far as her generation is considered...the mixed and the biracial and the need to label come from external energies.

As far as comments of the world classifying any child as being black just because one parent is black--that is ludicrous. My daughter has found her own way--she refuses to allow anyone to categorize her ethnicity or race. On school forms she checks all the boxes that she feels apply to her situation. When people are ignorant to raise the question, "What are you?", she looks them straight in eye with the warmest smile and says, "I am me."....Most people turn red from the shame of even going there...and for the one or two who persist the next reply is "I am of the Universal Creator, and you?"

I am of course her greatest fan, but she has taught me more about tolerance, love and genorosity than anyone I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. If you love your child and respect the "gift" that you have been given..the rest will just flow. Enjoy the ride!

There is a theory of racial ethics that is called the Assimilation Theory. This theory proposes that we get rid of all "races" and form one all inclusive new race. One that has its own traditions, language, culture. Hmmm. Has potential but my problem with the theory is the same one I have with not valuing all the cultures that a child is comprised of....you miss all the good stuff. If America made everybody join this brand new race and give up all of their culture we would not have Raggae music, carribean, mexican food, Jamaican food (my presonal favorite, Jerk chicken MMMMMM), or Italian food. My point is that you can't deny the cultures that your child is blessed to be "mixed" with but you should ignore the RACE. Some believe RACE to be created rhetorically (or from the use of language in order to persuade or argue), in other words they think that race was made from language and engineered to create difference. Culture runs deeper than that. PM me if you want to talk, my children are also Bi-cultural.

I am British by birth to 2 Jamaican parents, my daughter's mother is white, and my daughter now 11 is Blonde and Blue Eyed. When were in the store, people will look and say "wow....cute kid"....then proceed to look around the store for the parents. In England she would have been called " 1/2 cast"....in Maryland, I've heard "Mocha Babies", "Zebra's", "If she's 1/2 black, she's all yours". She doesn't worry about it, and neither do I. As schoolmommy said, one color of people will not lead to homogenization of the worlds culture. Look at Nth generation Italian American's, or German American's, they still hold true to a lot of their traditional customs. It's funny how some American's are intimidated of the "swirling" of people, yet sit back and watch the "McDonaldization" of the worlds food into one big bland sandwich. Oh..would you like fries with that ?

Schoolmommy and majohnit,
Well said. You both have put into words the thoughts I have myself but could not get them out. Celebrate cultures and forget the races. Celebrate just being human beings with the blessed individual traits that God gave us.
Keepinthagroove,
Your daughter sounds like the type of young lady that many could learn lessons from. Bravo for her.
Keepinthagroove and majohnit,
Welcome to the forum. It is nice to have you both here.
Carla

Carmen,
You might also check into books that deal with this very same issue..parents that are of different races. I have several of these books and I love them! Though I hate that this might be an issue for my child, I do realize in the world we live in, most especially the state in which I live, chances are, my son will run into some type of racial problem. I have a library full of books about being different, acceptance, etc. As someone mentioned earlier, don�t be too concerned about what others think. Do what is best for your child.

Yo

I'm pregnant with my first baby & he is going to be half korean-thats me and half mexican...how often do u hear of that lol. anyways, everyone makes fun that hes going to look philipino since theyre dark skinned asians. I'm the first in my family or relatives history to have a non asian breed baby, except for my cousin who beat me with her half korean half white son who was born a few months ago. I dont know how or if my relatives/family realize that the baby is going to be mexican but i guess they will when hes born in a month lol. in the old fashion korean culture its still considered a taboo/sin/looked down upon to be a single parent as well as interracial babies so i'm really lookin foward to be shunned once the baby is born.

My son is half white/half hispanic. His sister is caucasaion, fair skinned, just really different coloring.

I was worried about my family's reaction. My family was pretty cool with it. And really, hispanic you sometimes can't tell.

The one thing that concerns me is the expectation that Tex/Mex kids speak spanish, especially here in Texas. My son knows french. We have run into that one a few times, but it's not been as big an issue as I thought it might have been.

We've gotten lucky. My son looks so much like me that we don't get very many rude questions. My poor white daughter is the one who tries to say she's hispanic, and get's stared at for that one. No baby, you be white! Like, need sunscreen, bad white, just like me.

I absolutely love that, check all the boxes that apply, and then, I'm the universal creator, what are you! That's so great!

Carmen,I know that everything seems soooo overwhelming right now, but as a parent of a child who is biracial, let me just assure you that everything will be ok. At least you had the courage to tell your family. I did not and at the tender age of 18 shocked my parents when my son was born. There will always be some people that will look down upon you for having your child, but NEVER let them get you down. You are bringing a beautiful life into this world and if it wasn't meant to be then it wouldn't happen.My son will turn 10 in one week, and I thank God every day that I have him.You WILL be a great parent regardless of everyone's perceptions and judgements.Being a single parent is hard period. Thank goodness you and I both found this site. I only wish I had found it long ago. If I can be of any help let me know!Good luck!fulltimemom

Carmen, I have been in your very situation. My parents were what they called "ok" with it and everyone loved my daughter as soon as she was born, but there was always this tension there. What hurt me the most about your post, was that you said you could have said something to you dad but it wasnt worth it. But the truth is, it is worth it. You are worth it and so is that baby. The best thing to do is nip it in the bud right now before that baby is born and can feel the tension you feel, because it will. Sit your family down and have a serious family conversation. Tell them how you really feel and explain that if they love you with an unconditional love, they will support and care for you and your child. If they choose not to then you need to do what you have to do to build a positive environment for your child and give your family members space and time to realize what they are doing to isolate you. Right now you have no idea what life really is like with a baby -- and having a biracial baby presents alot of different challenges. Especially when the daddy is not standing up and being a man. But you can do it. You just have to believe in yourself and put the negativity out of your head and move on. When you see that baby for the first time you will be renewed with a strength you didnt know you had. Keep your head up. And on a lighter note, biracial babies are the most beautiful, but please dont call that baby mixed -- puppies are mixed -- children arent. Good luck girl.