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Single Family Voices - For Single Parents Online Single Parent Forums 30 - Something Single Moms being in a relatinship with someone younger than you...|
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I am New to SFV |
i was wondering if there's someone in a relationship with a man/woman younger...
i think you know i live in brazil and it's not unusual here... my bf is 10 years younger than me, he's 21. ia lways liked younger, even when i 16 - usually we're attached to older ones at this age... i think i'm like this because my mother was married w/ my father also 10 years younger.. but their marriage failed.. my kids father was 8 years younger and when we broke up i promised to myself ever get with a younger man again. but... i simply don't get it! anyway... my actual bf is wonderful like i said and he also likes my kids. he is always w/ me and i have no reason to be distrustful towards him, but i simply daon't get it1 i always think he'll leave me for another girl younger than me..  i don't know if others in my situation thinks this way or it's just me? i just can't relax into this relationship because my past... (u know my kids' "father"...) :badday: i'd love to hear other experiences! |
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I am New to SFV |
I was engaged to someone for 3 years that was 10 years younger than me. It was wonderful for my son because he had someone that could meet him at his level. But when it came to being responsible, he failed miserably. I also carried the uncomfortable feeling that the next young thing to come along would sweep him off his feet. I finally left him for many reasons, but ended up meeting the man of my dreams, my soulmate, and he too is younger than me. The difference? He has a child as well and younger men that have children (and have taken full responsbility for their child) are sooooo much more mature than a man without a child. Some men that do not have kids will never grasp that we can still love our child even if they are the biggest brat. They won't understand that that child is #1 and our world. So there's pros and cons. My advice, if you are going to go younger, get one that has a child or comes from a very strong family background.
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"Parent on Board" Parent on Board |
I would never ever ever date somebody significantly younger than I. My husband is only 4 months younger than I am, and that was the first time ever...and look where that got me!!!
It's totally personal preference...but I think older guys are kinda sexy!!! Well...not tooo much older...up to 40...i'm 26 so...yeah...maybe 36...dunno....NEVER 16!!! ha ha ha I'm not condoning...just throwing in my two bits! |
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"Active Board Parent" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
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"Active Board Parent" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
Hello I am new to this so bare with me. I was in a relationship w/someone 11 yrs younger than I for almost 3 yrs off and on again. And of course he did not have any children so he had no clue on how to deal with my boys. He could not deal with the fact that I put my boys before him. I believe it all depends on the maturity level the guy is at and if he has kids or not. A younger man w/kids will b more able to deal with what we are goin thru. I know I will steer clear from the younger men with no kids!!!
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I am New to SFV |
Most of the guys I've dated have been significantly older than me, 8 - 10 years, BUT I have dated younger men too, usually only a couple years younger. I find that it's not the age of a man, but how responsible he is and for every man that varies. I have been with guys older than me that were very immature and I have been with younger guys that are very mature and responsible. I believe a man with a child is TYPICALLY more responsible but that is NOT ALWAYS the case. Either way, good luck. If this man is wonderful with your children and loves you I would try not to worry so much about him leaving you for a younger woman. He probably is attracted to older women the way you are to younger men. We all have our preferences!!
:lovehearts: |
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Lively & Zealous Parent |
Age is a mind over matter-if you don't mind, it don't matter!
Seriuosly though, I think it all depends on the guys. I have dated guys older than me who acted like little boys, and I have dated guys up to 10 years younger than me... if a guy has had a lot of responsibility all his life then usually he will be a good man in a relationship. If a guy is youger than me, I feel better if they have kids or come from a big family so they are used to kids around...someone that is clueless about kids (of any age) or cannot learn to deal with whatever situation thay find themselves in, isn't worth it...whatever their age. |
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I am New to SFV |
Hi - I am glad to have found this thread. neen1968, are you still in the relationship you have mentioned? I too was with a 10 years younger guy for almost 6 years, but the last 3 were a lot of pain and agony, I guess I was just not ready to live. I have finally left the relationship a month ago, and now I am working hard at pulling my self-esteem together. After it started as the best relationship, as my ex grew older, he 'discovered' the world and one day told me I was old. From there on, I started comparing myself to all the younger girls around me and lived in fear of him leaving me for a younger and prettier woman.
I would be really happy to know that such relationships can be actually possible and that you are doing great in it. BTW, did you know that Agatha Christie's second husband was 12 years younger than she was and their marriage lasted until she died? Best of luck to all, Dana |
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At A loss for Words - NOT! |
I am a female...so from my perspective I wouldn't date someone younger than I...I prefer one a bit older with experience.
 But that is me....   Writing a guide for personal change, fullment and discovery for children with dead beat parents. If you as a parent, or the child have a story to share, would love to include it. |
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Single Family Voices - For Single Parents Online Single Parent Forums 30 - Something Single Moms being in a relatinship with someone younger than you...
