I am a newcomer here, and am in need of some support. I am 34, single with 2 beautiful children and 20 weeks pregnant. The father wants to be "involved" in the birth and baby's life, but not a part of my life. I am feeling overwhelmed at the responsibility of raising this little girl alone, knowing he won't make much time for her. My other children's father shares limited custody, but doesn't pay much attention to them either. I'm feeling at a loss knowing how hurtful this experience will be on this new little one. Anyone have any words of wisdom?

quote:

Originally posted by Pauli1107:
[qb]I am a newcomer here, and am in need of some support. I am 34, single with 2 beautiful children and 20 weeks pregnant. The father wants to be "involved" in the birth and baby's life, but not a part of my life. I am feeling overwhelmed at the responsibility of raising this little girl alone, knowing he won't make much time for her. My other children's father shares limited custody, but doesn't pay much attention to them either. I'm feeling at a loss knowing how hurtful this experience will be on this new little one. Anyone have any words of wisdom?[/qb]

WOW....did you know what you were getting into when the two of you concieved your daughter?
I know things look all "rosey" when your making a baby,saying things that Afterwards don't mean a thing....Children are blessings no matter who the fathers are or how much time they have for them...we need to cherrish them and let them know the WE love them....not mope around and say negitive things about their dads....all they know of their fathers are a "Title" not what the actual meaning of "Father" really is.....just an ice cream or a day at the park ...really they are just "Playmates", BUDDIES if you will...nothing long lasting or meaningful....definately not a relationship builder.....don't forget your very emotional right now too....thats a big factor in feeling Overwhelmed...just take it one day at a time and let GOD take your cares and worries away...give this burden to HIM...and he will see you through!

I totally agree, give it to god!! My son's father has only seen him in pics because when he was born he was in jail. Then he got deported to his country of origin. I cried many a night in the begginig thinking of what my son was missing. Till I realized his father is the one that's missing out, on the world's sweetes baby. He's now 2, & is the center of my universe. "HE" keeps me centered & reminds me of what really matters. HIM!! Hang in there, your faith will get u through!!

Pauli
Words (yes) of wisdom (? can't say).

You've got your hands full. So far, I'll bet you're doing a great job with your two children. You'll do well by your new one, too. You're likely to have little influence on the fathers' relationships with the kids. Most of what the "beautiful ones" get will be from you. It sounds like you have been doing a lot of soul searching. Continue to remove yourself emotionally from the fathers, and focus on what you know is best for your kids. Think about what a wonderful (of course never perfect) life YOU can give them. Sure it is great when the father can be involved, but it sounds like you have plenty of love to go around. Best wishes
Gwen

quote:

Originally posted by Pauli1107:
[qb]I am a newcomer here, and am in need of some support. I am 34, single with 2 beautiful children and 20 weeks pregnant. The father wants to be "involved" in the birth and baby's life, but not a part of my life. I am feeling overwhelmed at the responsibility of raising this little girl alone, knowing he won't make much time for her. My other children's father shares limited custody, but doesn't pay much attention to them either. I'm feeling at a loss knowing how hurtful this experience will be on this new little one. Anyone have any words of wisdom?[/qb]