Single Family Voices - For Single Parents Online
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30 - Something Single Moms
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I am New to SFV |
Hi! I'm new here. I'm a 22yr old single mom to a wonder little boy who just turned one. I'm just stressed and frustrated with my situation. His 'father' and I were together for 3yrs. He did nothing for me then and suprise,suprise he does nothing of me now. My son's 'father' (if you would call him that) does not care about my son at all. He uses my son to get to me and I do not like that all. He doesn't see him and he doesn't call to see how he is doing. The only time he calls is when he wants something from me (usually money). The worst part is he is now seeing this girl who has two kids and one on the way. He said he is going to be there for her kids and help her take care of them. I want to know why in the **** he can't be there for his son. What is so wrong with my son that he can't/won't be there for him. I don't understand. I feel like I failed my son becuase he doesn't have a father. I don't want him to grow up and think that there is something wrong with him becaus his father didn't want him and I have no idea how to keep that from happening. I'm doing my best I just don't feel like it is good enough.
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Lively & Zealous Parent |
People ****!
I do not understand why a parent decides which kids lives they are going to be apart of. Kid A I wont be with but Kid B I will and not Kid C. Its ****... You have to stop being a doormat.. I still let myself get used and seem to dish out money to my ex and he does NOTHING for me but give me grief and heartache. I NEED TO GET AWAY! Anyway. I have no words of wisdom. I'm an angry white woman right now... |
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| <justbeingthere>
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YOU are welcome~~~~~ Looking forward to reading more of your posts~~~
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Parent on Board |
First of all welcome. You have found a great place. I have only been on here for about two weeks and there are is so much support on here.
If you continue to tell your son how smart and handsome, and important he is to you. As he gets older you can also tell him that his Daddy had problems that he had nothing to do with. Because of his own problems issues for what ever reason he cannot be hear for you and that has nothing to do with you. That was his problem and he missed out on being a dad to a very special person. You, you did not miss out on someone that just was not capable of being a dad. If you remind him of that in your own way oftern as he gets older he will be fine. I always worry about my kids esp. my 6 year old boy blaming himself for the seperations soon to be divorce. I tell him all the time he had nothing to do with it. This is a decision that mommy and daddy had to make because of problems we had with each other. I tell him this on a monthly basis. I think your son will be fine. "If wishes were horses, than beggers like us would ride" |
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On the Board |
Hi Aidyn, MY name is Chanel , I have the same problem with my children's dead beat father. He has 8 children , he lives with three of them and thats the three that he sees. It's really sad that he is missing out on his children's life , they are growing up so fast. When they were younger they used to ask for him but now they can care less. I use to make up excuses for him but in he long run i realized that i was lying for him and he is not worth it. My children found out on there own that he is a loser. They would rather be around my boyfriend than him. ITS HIS LOST........
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I am New to SFV |
Aidyn,
I'm sorry you are going through this. I have a similar situation myself that I am dealing with. This is what you need to know: There is NOTHING wrong with your son. His father is a very selfish and inconsiderate person. All you can do is love your son, raise him and be there for him. He will realize as he gets older what kind of man his father is. There will be no action required on your part, you won't have to say anything regarding it. But your job in all of this is to be both parents to him and support him as best you can. Stay strong. Things will get better. |
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