My divorce was final last week. I am finally no longer married. I've been trying to get divorced for almost a year now and it's finally over. He was always drunk and started to get more and more abusive so I finally got the guts up to file and get my son away from growing up like that.

The only thing left is my ex has to have a monitor thing on his ankle called a SCRAM Unit ?? to show the Judge when he drinks. When we go back in 60 days the Judge will make his final decision on everything then. Knowing my luck he'll find some way to get out of it and it won't show any alcohol the entire time.

The Judge did go ahead and grant the divorce, lower child support, leave me with all the debt because my ex made me put everything in my name (yeah real stupid on my part) and the Judge said if I don't co-parent with in the next 60 days he'll make me move back where my ex is and lower child support to 300 which will leave me sitting in a state with no family or friends until I'm at least 55. I donno what to do 'cause I've made sure my son was ready every time for visitation, never kept him from his visits, i've given him medical updates on him and stuff. He forgets everything within 10 minutes. I'm just exhausted from trying to get him to leave me alone and stop harassing me, etc.

Any suggestions on what to do?

congratulations!

Document everything, check into a digital voice recorders, phone tap (yep legal in some states), video camera. Communicate in notes and emails, then keep copies. Some can help in court some in parenting plan studies.

I don't talk to my ex, but my mom records all phone calls. I also photo copy all notes I send her, and take still pictures as I don't want my video camera broken.

I wonder what the judge meant be co-parent, if he drinks and is abusive he doesn't sound like someone you could make plans with.

Congratulations on starting to move forward and upward.

As Dale said, document, document, document. Maybe instead of telling him everything, give him written copies, and have him sign off and he received such copies.

Keep a journal of everything that happens as it relates. Anything your son says, any conversations, ect. My divorce was final on June 8th. Though my journal never made it into court, it was certainly used in the negotiation phase of everything. My lawyer would come back, hmm. we have here that on July 16 you picked your daughter up for visitation, but you dropped her back on July 17 at 3pm? So you did not keep her for the whole visitation period?

Document, document, document. If you watch those judge shows, notice how the person with pictures often wins the case. Take a page out their book, and take pictures of everything.

Doesn't it feel like a huge weight was lifted off your shoulders? Now just think of what is ahead of you...a world of opportunities and happiness. Good for you!

Document everything you say or do when you interact with your ex about anything that has to do with your son. Take it one day at a time. Congrats on the divorce becoming final.