I have not persued child support from my 16 yo daughter's father for the past two years because "he said" he was out of a job. However I have since learned he has purchased a house. I am a bit torn between the resentment I feel about him being behind on child support and that he could "buy" a house... when I am struggling to pay rent for the 4 of us to live in a 3 bedroom apt. I could really use some input... Do I go to the AG's office and collect, now that he is obviously working... or is that distructive and mean???

How's that being distructive and mean? It's not your money, it's for your children.

I agree with Jes, that is in no way being destructive and mean, this is support for your children, which he should first be morally obligated to pay, but as in many cases (not all, as you can tell by the wonderful dads here on the board! ), since many are not, they need to be made legally obligated.

Do not hesitate for a minute, go file for child support -- like many of us, the payments may be anywhere's from nothing, to sporadic to steady, but file immediately, he owes it your children.

That is you childs money, contact the court about collecting whats owed. Its not distructive and mean, it doing what is right.

Agreed
If he can buy a house, he can pay support.

Curious, their must not have been recorded past due child support during this time, otherwise he'd have had a hard time getting a loan, with any liens that are recorded for unpaid support. Mortgage companies recquire release of liens before lending money like that.

If he can buy a house...he can support his child. End of story. No decision necessary.

But don't let your resentment show when in official company. Be calm and firm and precise.

... I am constantly struggling with feeling like I am "taking" from him and his family... yes he should be responsible to take care of his child, but how is he supposed to pay for his current family? This is an aweful situation...I hate that anyone has to suffer... I try to see to it that my daughter has a healthy relationship with her dad. I have taken all your supoortive words to heart and will follow through... it just feels (yuck!)

His "current" family includes your 16 year old.

Remember, he made the decision to have more children, and just because he has more children to support, doesn't mean he can omit the child the two of you had together.

Your daughter deserves the support he should be paying.

NO, it is not mean. DO IT...get what your children need and deserve!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think there are two things that you should be doing. One, get your back child support. Two, have your child support re-evaluated if his current job (the job allowing him to buy a house) pays better you can get your future support amount increased. I am not sure about all states but I know in VA you can have custody, visitation, and support re-evaluated every six months.