Am I the only single parent in my 30s?

That's okay, I don't mind talking to myself, it certainly wouldn't be the first time.

I am 35 and have a 4 1/2 year old boy.

Okay, one more time, HHHEEELLLOOO, is there anybody out there?

Guess not, I guess I will go take a nap.

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Hi,cmbtboots nope you are not the only 30 something mommie out here.
Though we are all jumping through hoops and just can't seem to find the time to sit and visit. But when we do... Here we be...

I am a single mother to four boys.

Welcome to our single parents group.

Hi moms. I have two children. My eldest is a 12 year old boy with ADHD. Anyone interested in talking?

Lets get a chat going!
Who else...

Hello Ladies,

I'm also a single mom of a 4yr old daughter. And I'm out here.

Hi to you all, I'm a new member to this site and looking to make some new Stateside contacts. I'm a single mother to a son aged 12 and a daughter aged 6, we live in London England and would love to make some neww friends......if you can spare the time. It's late here so I'm gonna sleep and await your reply

Hello Gals, I am 37 also a single mother of 2 1/2 kids ages 10 (girls) 17(girl) and a 6 month old baby boy which belongs to my 17 yrs daughter. I have been a single mother for 9 yrs now and it has been rough. Hope everything is fine with everyone as for me I think I will survive.

Hi ladies! I'm 39 with a 7 yr. daughter, and 3 yr. son. I've been single since my daughter was 3 months old. My second child was by choice out of marraige. IHd a miserable marriage of 7 years and it was one of the hardest things to terminate in my life. But by the time I did I was already through with the dreadful suffering of the failed marriage and I've loved my free new life ever since. Sometimes I feel bad for my kids not having their Dads around, or another good male rollmodel. As a matter of fact, I used to take pride in learning to rip the cord on my weed wacker and show my daughter that a woman can be self sufficient. But now i just get allsweaty and hate for her to see me that way -Haha! I think I'm beginning to feel my age.LOL! So much for my feminist stance. There is something to be said for the kind of woman who manages to get to her 30s and not have a clue as to how to jump start your own car.LOL! I don't know though. I have a real phobia of male dependency. Somehow the trade off never seems worth it. Oh what the hell, strutting across my plantation of a yard with a push mower is a great work out - who am I foolin'!

Hello to all,

I'm nearing 39 but I have managed to take care of myself as a single mommy. I'm sure I stay fit (slender) from stress to be honest. I'm not very hungry when I don't know how I'll pay my bills but I keep a fake front of being positive for my two young children.

I have been single for nearly 2 years now. I just wanted to get away from my now ex so I didn't end up with much but I got the best out of the deal with the children. I always wanted him to stay in their lives, but he had a change of plans. My ex now no longer wants to even have a relationship with them since he married his weirdo and immature wife, which I thought she was really nice at first, but after she married him she changed and if that's how they feel I don't want my children around them because I would be worried of how they would be treated very much so.

It's hard when one does not have a large or supportive family to help you get on your feet when you are divorced with children or just to help you out from time to time in any way. I'm in that catagory.

I tried an office job that didn't even have bennefits but by the time child care was paid out I was lucky if I had $70.00 to keep to my name for bills and food.

I went to welfare but it is a joke. Oh, I deserved it but it's kind of a mafia and I won't get into details of that at this time or publicly but it is a joke and some who work there are not even nice. I suppose they have heard and seen so much. Oh well.

I made arrangements to get into a homeless shelter with my two children and then I had a stroke of luck come my way. A friend that I had previously dated gave me a little help financially. He helps pay my bills so that I can attend college nearly full time.

Education is the key for the most part. It's not the lottery but it is one of the golden keys if one is having financial problems.

I'm not a 'kept' woman either as I have no patience for that but I can most certainly see how some become so frightened and so scared for the sake of their children that they would put up with that.

I got so tired of working for pennies that I finally got into school and am so glad I did.

We do get tired. We're stressed. We wonder somehow how we won't faint from being exausted. Single moms go on little sleep often. Sometimes we're so overwhelmed that we wonder how we do it. We always love our children, even if they seem to hate us if they do.

It seems it is challenging as a single parent but I want to do whatever I can to make it through my schooling to get my degree. I don't want my children to think that something comes for nothing. I want them to know the value of a good education too. I want them to know the value of being able to live independently and not with another because they need to or feel they have to.

I've come a long way in my road of being a single mom, but I have a long way to go before the scare is over.

The system allows so many to fall through the cracks. So many just need a little help to get realisitically on their feet.

If some have an ex spouse who does pay a healthy amount of support and has allowed or left you with a home, be appreciative of that. Some don't even have that. Some would love a huge lawn to mow with joy if they had one. Some of us are in shelters and to watch your children in a shelter is heart wrenching. Some of us feel lower then whale dung. Those of us who ride that fine line of constantly dodging a shelter (like me)
are still frightened but we count every single teeny tiny blessing, like the fact that our car held out for just one more day. Some of us don't have one and some have one that is running on rust and prayers only.

I haven't had health insurance for over two years now.

The lives of my children and I depend soley on me. Someone making it on a wing and a prayer most certainly.

There's another thing some, not all, of us have to contend with, after divorce, the ex has now had NO desire to show that he loves his children. Where in the hell did that one come from? Have some watched their children cry out often and throw an outburst from the hurt and confusion of it? I have.

Some of us have ex husband's we don't want anywhere near our children or us for good reasons and the kids are ok with that in some cases, confused in others.

I pray to God at night because I'm so tired and afraid. I would like to think he is out there. Something, even if so small, tells me that he could be so I hope he hears me. Sometimes I wonder if he's just busy but I know if he lives he is there.

Sometimes I wonder why God doesn't point his finger and give us single parents a break from time to time, but in my heart, I'm sure he does and did. We just didn't know it was a gift from him.

I believe as single parents who keep going from one day to the next, and wondering how we managed to, because our plates are often over flowing, that we are indeed so much stronger then we give ourselves credit for. Sometimes it flat out sucks! However, again, I feel we are true survivors. Strong creatures. It doesn't mean we always want to have to be the brave and strong, but, we are. Sometimes we are just tired and feel grouchy and tired.

One thing I did want to write about was that there are men out there who may seem like God's answering our prayers by sending them to us. Be very mindful that many men look upon a struggling single woman with children as prey to slowly creep up to and then suddenly you are with a man who has an anger issue or who is flat out a mental in sheeps clothing, or God forbid a pervert.

Abusive men will single you all out very carefully, with a so so income, well to do, or highly wealthy. If they were the jerks that some of them are right away, they'd not get to far. Be mindful of this and if a red flag goes up in your mind, take heed to it ladies, regardless of how golden it appears.

We are all toughing it out. Sometimes I bet I'm not the only one that feels like a loser and flop, but then we have days where we really know we are doing a good job, regardless of what we cannot give our children, but one day hope to give them.

If it wasn't for a dear old friend of mine, humiliating as it was to get in touch with him, grovel, and show how pathetic I was doing, we all would more then likely be living in a card board box in the bushes somewhere eating garbage food someone else threw away.

I make it day to day, week to week, month to month. I don't think about my financial fears or I'd probably die of a heart attack, but more so I try to focus on ONLY the goals and postive. I don't want a man to save me, but there are days where it would be a welcomed fantasy. I want to learn how to be able to make it on my own and allow us to just make it somehow. I just know that I see in my mind and even write down, or keep a secret scrap book of all of the things I want for my little family. I vision it in my mind constantly. I write down the goals and desires I have for us. I keep a photo or print outs of real estate dream property that we would realistically love to have.

Never underestimate the power of your mind, ladies, as tired as it gets sometimes. Somehow, when we keep seeing it, keep focusing on it, keep believing in it, write it down, it somehow happens. Not maybe the next day, but somehow and I don't know how.
This can even include Mr. Wonderful for those looking for that.

Also, never let anyone rain on your dreams and hopes. Who are they anyway? Do those people pay your bills? If so, one day they won't. Do those people bear your burdens? So, let it go in one ear and out the other or just drift away from the party poopers and those who don't add to your positive focus.

Attitude is everything for us too. It is. I was thankful that I had an extra lightbulb in my closet the other day because right now, spending any extra money would scare me.
Even that much.

At times, we have lived on sandwhiches and soup for the week to make it to the next.

I found the huge, garage sale of garage sales two weeks ago and now my children have some nice school clothes to start school in this fall. For twenty dollars we left with more then I could ever have hoped for. NICE STUFF TOO! God was blessing us and when I went home that night I prayed for God to bless those people who sold us nice clothes for my children, for pennies. Maybe they could tell or saw something in my eyes. I try to hold on to dignity as much as possible. Regardless, I was grateful.

Another thing I remind myelf of CONSTANTLY is that I can walk, talk, hear, see, and there are many who cannot. I do have that still and for that, I am so thankful because it seems like it could be so much worse for as bad as it can be.

Ever wonder if you can make it through the front door when you get home with the children due to being so tired, then an hour later you find a huge mess the kids made and were just too tired to even deal with it? If you have a littler one, they just make messes to make messes and you just have to clean them up, when you have the strength. Ever look at your videos, books, etc, and they've been pulled out and thrown all over the floor by a loving littler one and, well, oh well, that's to be expected.

Ever step on a Llego block in the middle of the night and wanted to yell out every filthy swear word known to man kind...but didn't?

Nomatter what, we are all meant to succeed. I believe God, nor the forces of the universe, did not make rejects. I believe a lot of our mind set keeps us from getting our highest potential and we just have to remind ourselves that we all are winners meant for success and that being poor and struggling is just a temporary situation.

For those of us who do not believe in God, and struggle, just keep seeing those images in your minds of success every single day.
Tell yourself that you are a winner, beautiful, and meant for success. Our children are counting on us.

Oh, I pray for patiences too. Every little bit helps. I don't have a big problem in that department but I do get tired and am rather laid back at this point. I've learned that getting so scared can cause many frightful chest pains. About a year ago from stress of money and such, I thought I was having a heart attack FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE but had no insurance to even deal with it let alone a sitter, so I just stayed home and found out later that it was stress. It feels awful and even to take a breath it feels like someone is stabbing you in the heart with a fork or something, so, again, try to do all one can to not worry yourself sick. What will be will be and deal with each fire when it starts. Don't worry about next month as it is not here yet and anything can happen between now and then. Miracles happen every day, ladies. Don't ever forget that.

It is my hope that we all make it through our situations.

I read some of these posts and could relate to a lot of what was written in some and many all too well.

I was feeling a bit down myself today so I poked around to see what was going on at any single parent groups just to maybe read or chat a bit. Sometimes it is nice to be reminded that you are not alone even if you feel you are.

Take care out there everyone and I hope you all find happiness beyond your expectations and achieve your goals in life. Keep seeing the things in your mind you want to achieve, even if it is weight loss (been there too--oh yes). Sometimes we are the only one who will or does believe in us, so don't forget that.

Just a mother who's making it one day at a time, scared, but persevering and has hope.

hi, I'm a single mother of three I'm 34 one is 11(girl), 9(boy w/ADHD) and 6(boy). I've been doing this for 6 yrs. and i understand about needing grown-up that understand to talk to so if anyone wants to talk let me know.

to motherofmonsters:

I have 3 (adopted) kids, a girl 13, boy 10 and boy 8. They all have behavior problems of different sorts. 13 girl still has temper tantrums over a simple no - i.e. screaming, kicking walls, throwing some things, banging on bedroom door - all for a lengthy time. My 10 yr boy has been very disrepestful and I'm not having much luck getting him to improve, (by taking away privileges - TV, dessert, games - gameboy, playstation, etc. He is also ADHD and on meds and lacks impulse control a lot. Want to chat and help each other with ideas?

Hi, I am also in my early 30's and a single parent of 4. 3 girls and 1 boy. My son is hell on wheels. I work full time as a special ed teacher from 7:30-4:00 everyday. After that I am mom, teacher, nurse, maid and anything else you can think of. My son is very hyper and will soon be going to counseling. I am amazed at the kids I help through my job but don't know what is wrong with my own son. Kids at work are different than your own.

hello, i am new here, i live in washington state and i am a single mom of 5 girls, 3 which are teens, one who as she puts it, almost an adult(18 this month lol) and been a single mom for 2 1/2 years and i will tell you it is hard. he and his new bimbo bought a house only 3 blocks from me( wasnt that nice of him!) and he does see them and pays his support but feels he has to do nothing more for them.
i am hoping to meet some other moms out here that are going thru some of the same things as me. with many kids and just trying to make it.
i am 38 and never imaginged being a single mom and especially at 40 lol.
diana

Hi everyone! Another 30ish single mom here. I have one 5 1/2 yo boy, he is my joy, but it is tough. Just joined and am poking around a bit.

Hi, I am a 34 yr old single mother of 3 girls and I have another on the way..I seem to have really bad luck finding a man to spend the rest of my years with..but thats alright because I love my children to bits and they help to make my days go by..Im new to this and can`t figure out how to chat....I would love to talk to you all.. Im glad to hear that there are moms out there just like me