Hi everyone, I'm new and looking for some pointers. I married to get out of a bad home life, and got into a horrible marriage. The best part was having 4 wonderful boys. I've been diviorced since April of 2004 and have a 9 month old baby with a man who is in a relationship with another woman, and completely uninvolved. I stayed at home with my other children until they were all school age. Now I am so far out of the job market I'm having trouble figuring out how to begin...I don't know how to manage financially if I put my baby in daycare. What do people who are single with no family to help do to survive and care for thier children?... Any pointers?

Hi steelgirl and welcome.
There are some good resorces in your state. Some help you find daycare and pay for it and others help you find a good job. You can start by calling children services in your county and they should be able to steer you in the right direction.
Remember that you and your kids have a big adjustment to make and it will take some time getting it all together.
As far as financially the first thing I would like to say is stay away from debt! Do not put things on credit cards. If you don't have the money in cash don't buy it. Keeping away from debt will put you so far ahead of the game it is unbelievable.
How are you making it now? Do you have a place for you and your children to live? Do you have a job?
You will make it. One step at a time. Lots of prayers are with you and your kids.
If I can do it with 9 living in my home you can too.

Hi steelgirl5,

Welcome to SFV. We have many members and a volume of experience here. Read through the many posts for inspiration and ideas. "Frugal living" will help you a lot. You can find it from the forum summary. Just scroll down.

I like your name. It's fitting.

Hey Thanks tomany2count and jaydsdad!!

I went to "Frugal living" and let me tell ya, some of the ideas were funnier than heck! I got a laugh and some tips! I do have a place to live and some money in savings, though it is dwindling swiftly. I moved to Central IL, from the Chicago area in Aug. 2004, and though I have an aunt my age in the area... I haven't gotten out much 'cause of the move the winter and the baby to meet any new friends. I've spent much time just driving around to find out where everything is. Thank goodness I found this site! I was about to loose my mind!

I can imagine. I about loose my mind just in the winter all by itself. First things first find a job. Any job. When I was really struggling I delivered newspapers to make extra money. I went as far as riding a bike so I didn't spend money on gas.
You can make it just use your head and common sence.

Find out if you qualify for daycare vouchers would be my suggestion. There are some cruddy daycares out there but there are also some good ones. I have a friend who asked for her daycare to give her references. With the vouchers she pays $20/month.....

I was very fortunate to have my parents and in-laws close by when my kids were younger. They were always willing to babysit and they encouraged the idea. It's a tradition in my culture to have the in-laws or family to babysit. Even after I became single I could still rely on my ex in-laws to sometimes babysit my kids.

But in your case, there are state programs to help with daycare costs for single parents who make below a certain minimum wage requirement. I suggest you call your local social services and welfare office to get more information. There is nothing wrong in asking for help until you can get back on your feet again.

Good luck and take care. Do update everyone.

steel im a single mother of 4 and im going thru the same thing. i suggest department of humans services. i get help through them with my daycare and food. i also applied through the housing authority for help with rent. you have to jump through alot of hoops but to give my kids a better chance i will swallow my pride and do what it takes.