Hi,

I have 2 girls currently both age 5 (11 months apart), I need advice controling them, they think and act like they are boss, neither one does anything I say and if I tell them not to do something they just go ahead and do it anyways, (Ex. I told my oldest earlier not to go into the fridge, that I would get her a drink, she went over and got the drink herself anyways) of course if I don't do what they want like right now, watch out, I have tried everything as far as punishments, time outs, taking things away, spankings Ect. also with my oldest it seems like no matter how many times I punish her for something she just goes and does it again an again (Ex. she has been punished numerous times for writing on her bedroom walls, including scrubing it herself, and I found out tonight she wrote on it again).

Because of the situation with their dad (read my post called DAD) I have child custody watching me, so I am afraid to punish too severly, but something has got to be done

to me it sounds like 2 normal 5/6 year olds...and I am really looking forward to my child being that age.
They're probably just seeking attention (with success).
Maybe dedicate more time to them : no answering phones, no work, no other people, Mommy to them completely for a full hour every day (and more on the weekend). 'Let's play a game ' type of thing. And that is a regular thing and will not be taken away even if they're punished.
Just an idea. (I suppose you have already tried that too )...
oh, and regarding the bedroom walls: let her write on them, they'll want a new wallpaper when they're teenagers anyways, and in the meantime ...who cares...that will take that much 'leverage' away from her. You could even make it a 'project'-like, 'let's re-decorate you room'

oh, and if something worked, let me know, I am collecting 'ammunition' for when mine is older.

Daniela

There's a book titled How to Behave So Your Children Will, Too! that you should strongly consider reading. I think it could help you a great deal.

Hi, Daniela

I read your reply, it is a good idea, except the part about letting them write on their walls, if it were up to me I would, but my parents bought me the house, the girls and I live here, but they own it, when they found out the girls drew on the walls, I'm the one who got yelled at. I know you did'nt know that when you suggested it.

OH
NO
D.