Thanks Guys
My names is Leo by the way
My sons name is Donavan. I'm starting this new thread. I was told this may help to meet more of you good people. I wrote that maybe my son might be doomed. I really should say. Sometimes I feel like we will be doomed. You see I've been devorced for 7 years. I fought for my marrage,
lost. For custody of my kids, lost. Also accused of batery. Won that. Anyway, It took me 3 years to be ok with being a weekend dad. Got a great girlfriend. Went down to Cobo on vacation. Came home, finding my son and a box of toys and cloths left at my sisters house.(she was'nt even home) That was 3 years ago. Now, no girlfriend, smoking again 30lbs over wieght. Also lost my job. I love my kids theres no dought. But im telling you im losing it. Im going to hang out with you guys for awhile. What I've read here put me in perspective. I know I can change some things. But the kids mother is unbelievably cruel. To the kids, Donovan the most. Its here baby. I've let friends here the messages left by her when he's over there, and she bringing him home. 12 hours after getting there. one of my friends cried when she heard it. Its bad real bad. I have full custidy. I would hurt anyone that would treat my son like this. But how can I hurt the woman that he calls mom.

Snagltooth,
Hello there and welcome to the board. I first want to try to make some sense here. You have full custody of one child, named Donovan? Or do you have more children in your custody? Also, are you saying that the mom is abusing the children??....because you said your friend cried when she heard a message from her.

I am glad you found the site. Try to hang in there and give us some more insight as to why you feel like you are losing it. There are a lot of good people in here who may be of help to you. Take care.

Hi Leo,
Welcome. I can relate to your problem with a cruel ex. I don't know your details but I have similiar problems. My ex does everything she can to come between me and my girl. I just work around her and build a strong relationship between me and my daughter. When the ex kicks, I kick back even harder. Legally speaking that is. When my daughter is with me, I don't say anything or do anything negative concerning her mom. The issues are between the parents and shouldn't involve the kids.
I know how you feel or did feel about being a weekend dad. I was angry at first too until I realised there is no such thing as a weekend dad. She may not be with me all the time but I'm still her dad all the time.
Don't let your anger boil up inside. It's not healthy for you or your son. Vent here. We're here to help each other. I know you would like to exact revenge for her cruelty but this will only reflect back on you. Your best revenge is to be the best parent you can. Your child will see the truth as he grows and you will come out on top.
Good luck and keep us up on things.

I want to echo jaysdad.

Be the strong one and always keep the kids interest first. In the end, you'll both be better for it.

Hey Leo, you still with us? I know I replied to you elsewhere, just wondering how things are going for you?

hey leo
im new to the site to and also new to parenthood period. i dont know if anything that i have to say will make much of a differnece to you but im going to say it anyhow. my neice who is now my adopted child is a handfull but her mother (my sister) is worse. she was never abusive to the child but she was worse than neglectfull. she would leave Megan alone for days on end in her apartment to fend for herself. now that Megan is in my care her mother is being extremely abusive (verbally) to her and me. its to the point where i will not let my 'daughter' answer the phone. but i do promise you there are are things that you ca doo about it. for one thing you can go to the pd and claim mental abuse for a complete restraining order. or you can refuse to let the children listen to the phone. not the best thing to do but it is a last resort. and if you have to you can have your phone restricted to outgoing calls only for the time being or change your number. i hope this might help you alittle.

Hello Leo & all single dads out there. The only thing that I can say is, the only thing worse than an insensitive father is an insensitive mother.

Leo just keep your head up high and be the idol and father that will help mold your children into great people.

I was in a very abusive relationship and the key I found to overcoming it all was that it is not my responsibility to punish him (unfortunately for my 3-yeart old, this doesn't apply to him). At some point he will get what he deserves. Most likely he is a totally miserable person, when he isn't making other people miserable which makes him happy. But the point is that he is being punished by being miserable. ... Am I making sense? Anyway maybe just try to protect your son.

Leo,
It's hard to cope with something like that. The abusiveness is part of the reason I got divorced on the first place. You might want to go back to court and get supervised visitations or something to that effect to ensure the saftey of Donavan. Afterall we as parents need to make sure that our little ones are safe.

Hi Leo, I am new to the site as well. Hopefully I can give some sound advice. First of all you said things aren't going to good " smoking again 30lbs over wieght. Also lost my job"
I know it sounds pretty simple--but I have learned you have to take care of yourself to be able to care for your child. From your description of your ex she sounds like she needs help. Your child needs you to be strong and healthy and there for him.
I am not sure what you are saying is going on at your ex's, but I agree with clayandkalebsdad, that you should seek a court order only allowing supervised visitation.
Be strong brother---there are a lot of us here that care about you

Hey, thanks for responding but this post is a couple years old...I kinda doubt that Leo's still around.

Welcome to the site, however!

Later,
Bobby