Hi All,

I'm new to the site. I had a question that has me actually up at night anxious. Does anyone ever experience age discrimination. Not completely overtly but just little things like comments, attitudes from women in their 30's - I will be 40 in 1 year.

How do I cope with the world of the young and the beautiful - I watched that movie and recommend it to all of you "I Could Never Be Your Woman" with Michelle Pheiffer - about this topic. But I wanted to hear from other mothers.
I see my daughter blossoming and I feel a sense of loss - my youth is gone or going or just a wisp of a weed and she is gorgeous and strong. I dont see much of society giving accolades to the "older" gorgeous and strong women of our society - just the Brittnies and Lindsies of the world.

Livvie's Mom

welcome livvie
It took a moment for me to understand you meant your age is 'old'.
Definitely: no. A am 40 and my son is 5. Statistically, I am an old mother, but never ever felt that way and no one made me feel that way. I think they should revise the terms in the statistics. If I was married, I would have another child without a thought. Just the other day, I heard of a 50 year old woman, a friend of a friend, who just had a baby. How does this make HER feel !
And then, honestly, youth is beautiful, and there is nothing no say against it, we have all been there. But a little maturity is even better. MHO

quote:

I dont see much of society giving accolades to the "older" gorgeous and strong women of our society -

Then you are looking in the wrong places. Perception = reality.

My role models are more often 'real' people from my church or my community, but to keep to your Holly-wood perspective, howzabout: Demi Moore, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Madonna, Sheryl Crow, Jennifer Anniston, Courtney Cox, Susan Sarandon, Ellin Barkin, Cher all of them are over 38. On tv - Heather Locklear, Brooke Shields, Patricia Arquette, Katie Couric, Martha Stewart, Kyra Sedgwick, Oprah, Rachael Ray, all of the women on *** and the City, all of the women on Desperate Housewives... I can keep going, but I think you see my point. Dont make me mention history-changing politics. None of these women let age stop them.

Oh, and the women I mentioned all seem to be noteworthy because of the positive things they do. Lindsay and Britney for the negative things they do.... What do you make of that?

Hey,

I gotta say, all of the age discrimination that I've faced has been the reverse of this. People look at me and little Bobby, do the math on our ages, and immediately make assumptions that I have to work to disprove.

At his school, at his activities, at my job ... people assume that they must know more than I do because they're older. It doesn't matter how much more time and effort I've put in over the past 14years...

If it was just me, I would live with this but since a child is depending on me I can't let myself be put down. Lol...so instead I bulldoze through the old people as if my opinion is every bit as valid as theirs. I'll acknowledge when they show I'm wrong and I'll learn from them, but when I'm right I'll show them where they're wrong and the old people worth knowing will learn from me. The ones that get offended and not like me...to **** with them...and really, their behavior just goes to show *why* they're getting passed by young people in life...

Later,
Bobby

Livvie I feel your pain....

I'm not 40 yet but I sometimes see my youth disappearing. Then I get a comment from 10 year old Sunday school students who think I'm 25 LOL. Wish more adults felt that way... would be nice to get carded when ordering alcohol.

I think you're only as old as you project... so I'm trying Sarah's new pastime of smiling at random strangers.

Sarah -- I dare ya to make 20 strangers smile at you this week! First one done sends a PM to the other Next month... lets see how many strangers we can make blush!

geeze, and here I turn 50 in july , and no, I don't give people advice on how to raise their kids, well a little bit here is all.

The only thing I could say on this Bobby, and this is only on a few of the old farts, is the advice you might get is simply from some one who has been there. Kind of like how we lean on other peoples knowlege here, because they have been through it.

Now, that being said, there are those like my father out there, who's only parenting role was to bring in the money and give to my mom so she could take care of it. Now it seems he has turned into super parent and is full of advice. He also judges my 16 year old on a standard of what my niece has did in college. sure, everyone goes to Berkley and graduates with a 4.25 grade average. Their last fight reminded me of a couple of sailors on the phone . Anyway, I am rambling

Livvie,
I'll be 42 come end of August....I can honestly say that before meeting my beautiful soon-to-be wife...I was actually preferring to be in the company of women my age and older ....as they really do seem more intrinsically beautiful that the younger crowd ( at least in my area! SFV women NOT withstanding! before I'm lynched! ) that seem to be in the singles world.

I dont know about you.....but I dont feel anywhere NEAR my age! Age did play a really big part in my decisions prior to my recent developements....funny how the right person can change your perspective on things.

quote:

Originally posted by Lurch:
The only thing I could say on this Bobby, and this is only on a few of the old farts, is the advice you might get is simply from some one who has been there. Kind of like how we lean on other peoples knowlege here, because they have been through it.

Oh, don't get me wrong. I do have healthy respect for experience and other people's points of view. I try to respect the points of view of people younger than me too...

What I'm speaking of, are the people who look at me and say "what could *you* possibly know." Also the people who can't accept that I'm ever right about anything, because I'm younger than them. Heh...I did sound combatative in my post about those (and I sort of meant to).

Hello Livvie ,,, again!
On age... gotcha! I will be 60 when my son graduates from HS! I don't mind.. I love finally being a parent. I still run and do pushups like I did in my 30's.
He will keep me younger! ha I have been asked if he is my grandchild twice ( should make sure I leave the house looking my best!.. nah...) And I have a stepdaughter(I kept her when I dumped her dad!) She has 4 that call me gramma! Mine is the youngest!