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"Parent on Board" Forum Board? No- KeyBoard! |
Some have asked, so here it is, no editing or anything because it is to painful. I didn't put it all in cause I am drawing on memory.
My story. Note, I am not going to strech this out but putting in the good times or when nothing happend. I will consintrate on my troubles. Bare with me this is all memory, some is recorded in the reno police department, court, and nevada mental health. To start, I was married in 1987, too a woman people said I should check her back ground, Diagnosed with mental illness(Schizophrenia) at 20, I though I was a good judge and ignored them. everything was good til 1995, when I was forced to go to work in Reno. I am a Ironworker, so I have to move sometimes to work. I left my wife and two young girls in modesto Ca. I came bace every weekend. That wasent good enough for my wife, they had to be with me, so they came to live in reno. Life was good, after a year we had a new house(brand new), and two new cars. Now, this is where things turn to ****, my wife decided that she was not diagnosed right, so she get a MD, not a Psychiatrist, to say she is only depressed. So, she goes on a new medicne, for depression. I first knowtice when everything started being my fault, money, the kids, anything thing. She would make a decision and one week later It was my fault. I am a strong person, or I used to be, after 8 months, it was waring me down. I didn't just let her blame me, the fights where bad. Then one night she started one and was throwing stuff at me, TV trays, vases, potery, man she put some holes in the walls, and no I never touched her. So she wigs completelty out and goes and tells the neibors. So it calms down. Then the next day I come home from work and the cops are waiting, I am like "what the hell?", seems she went and got a TOP(temp order of protection). I wonder at that system, no proof, I was thrown out of my house, couldn't see my kids, ugh. For months she was acting bizzare to say the least, and even if I called Child Portective sevices about it, I was a disgruntaled parent, intell, the court saw her acting weird, then I was undisgruntaled. So I got the kids, I stayed with my dad, as my house was under the TOP. Then she started calling, I started recording cause them calls was getting weird, I swear some of them sounded like linda blair in the exorsist. One night she call and accused my brother of molestiong my kids, I stayed with them in the same room as me so it was crap. Then she showed up at the house banging at the door saying we where all going to die, ugh. 10 Reno PD showed up and arrested her, she told a felame officer she was going to marry the sargent. (sigh) So I went to court, got my house back, 9 months behind in payments from which I never recovered. Mean while, my EX was living in hotels, motel, and charging every credit card we had up, in the end I had $37,500 in judgments against me, corse that getting ahead of myself. You know the easyest way to find you have no rights, marry someone who is unstable. I heard She has her rights so many times I wanted to scream, I didn't have rights, my kids who where crying for their mom didn't have rights, only her. She did all this crap for a year after, and I am sure I forgot half the crap, but she ended up in nevada menatal health, the hospital. After about 3 months on meds she starts calling, and the kids start crying for their mom, I should have said no, but kids need a family, sooo, when she was released we got back together. We moved to Missouri, I bought a house, and we lived there, I stayed close to my kids cause I was ever watching. Finally when the girls was old enough they told me I should divorce my wife, I figured they could handle her, we talk and agreed it was best. after about 3 months I get a call from CPS, come get your kids. I have left out a lot, but I am not a novelist, and this would be pages long. |
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"Parent on Board" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
Thank you for sharing Paul.This has been very hard for you and I do understand the unable to edit part.I am truely sorry for the pain she has caused you.Mental illness is such a difficult diagnoses to deal with.Know that you are in my thoughts and I do hope at some point your ex gets the help she needs.You have been strong and brave through this all and your daughters will reap the rewards of that.Paul try really hard to open up about this.My past is painful but the more I write it down and share it I realize I have done everything In my power to get help.I am willing to listen with out judging you.People like you stand as mentors for dealing with mental illness and treatint your ex with dignity no matter how much she has hurt you and your daughters.I know you will find the peace you are seeking.Becuse of you your daughters will blossem into intelligent woman that treat people with handicapps with the ut most respect.You are a fine,kind spirit and All you have stood for will eventually come back to you in a positive way.Take care and Hugs Gail
:huggies: :huggies: :huggies: :huggies: |
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"SEEKING: 25th hour & 8th day" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
Paul,
Thank You so much for sharing your story. I am certain it was difficult to recount. You now stand as a man that has been through hell and is working his way back up. I am happy your girls are with you. I am happy that you are man enough to have a grip on the situation. You realize their mother has a mental disorder and you do not bash her. It is difficult for the best of us to keep our senses and not remain angry about our past relationships. Regaining physical things that have been lost will come in time. |
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"Still plugging along" At A loss for Words - NOT! |
Paul, it sounds like you went through the ringer too. Life is certainly not easy with an unstable person. It's really tough when kids are involved, too. I'm glad your daughter's ended up with you, and the court finally saw that she was uncapable of taking care of them. I know what it's like to have someone say all kinds of weird, irrational stuff. It's a very uncomfortable feeling to be around them, as it's like living with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. My mom was on anti-pyschotic medicine on and off througout my whole life with her. She was hospitalized a few times while we were growing up. I know she tried to commit suicide one time. What I remember most, though, is the weird things she would say. Totally off the wall. I hated it. I never could talk to her about anything, ever. Even when she was normal, it wasn't really normal. So I really have a problem with anyone who starts acting irrational, and I have a hard time handling an intimate relationship with someone like that. It just doesn't work. I'm too uncomfortable. I can get kind of whacky myself, so I really need a stable mable as my mate. It's very important for me to be comfortable with a person I'm going to spend my life with. You're a good father, Paul. Thanks for sharing.
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40 - Something Single Dads
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