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Old 08-06-2012, 02:36 AM   #1
shesdoinwell Female
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Default Disillusioned and Heart-broken

Hi, I'm Tanya, and I am the single mom of 4 grown children...Girls: 30,25, and 22; and a Boy: 20. All four are in college or college grads, and are contributing to the world in great ways as adults.

I am struggling a lot lately with the apparent lack of respect and gratitude that is coming from my kids. I am deeply hurt by these kids, as I truly know that I have earned and deserve all the respect in the world for what it took to raise them without ANY help whatsoever from family. I did have incredible, caring friends who definitely helped along the way, however, I have never had any people that I knew for sure would / could be there when we needed them.

This was **** tough through the years...took a whole lot of sacrifice, determination, and fortitude...but I did it, and I never once considered any other option. I formed my entire life around them...my work hours, my social life, all my major choices. I never used substances or exposed them to men I was dating (didn't even date much)...these kids were my LIFE and, because of my love for them, their welfare was my only priority.

Throughout those years, on the toughest days, sometimes the only thing that would get me through was to remind myself that, when the kids were older...when they had an adult perspective, without a doubt, they would respect and honor what I had done...that someday they would KNOW. I am not talking about receiving any medals or even any special treatment, necessarily, but I guess I'm just talking about some common respect...perhaps the absence of resentment when I need them to help me move...maybe NOT pointing out any and every flaw I have and discussing them with anyone who will listen.

I'm sorry to vent, but it honestly hurts. I feel like I should warn single moms not to expect their kids to ever appreciate or even acknowledge what they are giving to them...and to make themselves a priority so that they are not left feeling like I feel at the age of 50 - after I have given all I have to them. I know that is SO cynical, and i would never say that to a single mom, but it's honestly how I feel now.

I hope someone has some insight for me...I really need some perspective.
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