Wild Dancing Thanksgivng Turkey Single Parents Forum: Single Family Voices - View Single Post - She's driving me NUTS!
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Old 07-09-2010, 02:40 PM   #7
Bluemoon Female
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Default Re: She's driving me NUTS!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Live4Them View Post
As far as P's brother, yes, he's really sober. When his job found out what he had done, they gave him an ultimatum. Sober up, get help, or lose his job. He's been there for like 10 years. Not to mention, he was ordered by the courts to get help. If he doesn't have certain things done and completed by a certain time, he loses his license for 18 months, and goes to jail.

As far as C being around her sex offender boyfriend, that's not even an issue. He's not allowed over here, and she only has supervised visitations. So he's never around him. Calling CPS would do nothing for P and C at this point.
I'm pretty sure LSL meant that if you did allow her to have C, then she would break the rule to keep him away from C and then an outsider could call CPS (or something could happen) and P would lose C because he allowed C to be with her when it was clearly a risk for C.
So, for that reason, her having C, alone, is not an option.

Also, I am not intending to speak ill of P's brother, and I do not think he is a danger to C at all in this case.
I just want to say that alcoholism is a cunning and baffeling disease.
While being forced into treatment does work alot of times, it is not the ideal situation. Short term it is, but not for long term sobriety.
Sometimes when the trouble has passed, they can trick themselves into thinking that it was just an isolated incident that got them in trouble and they can control it now, they have learned their lesson.
If they go because their life is unmanageable, they are aware and sick and tired of it, drawing on multiple memories of pain and humiliation at the hands of their disease...well, obviously that's a little more difficult to sweep under the mental rug.

Just be aware of signs like if he quits going to AA. Doesn't change his association with his former drinking buddies.

I'm just sayin, don't underestimate the power of the disease and realize that he can potentially be fooled by it in ways a non-alcoholic could never imagine possible.
It has NOTHING to do with his character. He is, I'm sure, a great guy.

Last edited by Bluemoon; 07-09-2010 at 02:53 PM.
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