Wild Dancing Thanksgivng Turkey Single Parents Forum: Single Family Voices - View Single Post - Where is Christ in Christmas?
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Old 12-13-2016, 11:04 PM   #3
Virgo69 Female
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Default Re: Where is Christ in Christmas?

Well, when I refused to turn over a large sum of money with no estimate for work or contact information to one of his family members who is untrustworthy, my sick friend just revoked my power of attorney. He has been helping me out until I can get the ship righted so lord knows what that means for me and my house.

I see the pretty lights on the decorated houses and think, boy...little one would like that one. I miss our traditions that she and I made our own and shared together. I watch Christmas specials by myself, and think back to years ago.

I really want to just throw in the towel. Yet, I spent hours cleaning the other day to the point that I couldn't move well today and ask myself why? It won't change anything. No matter what I do, it will never be enough to get us to the light at the end of the tunnel. The more stressed out I get, the worse my OCD gets and my anxiety levels, and my migraines.

I feel like a magician who is all out of rabbits to pull out of her hat. There is no hussle and bussle of the holiday, no preparation needed because there isn't going to be celebration. As I am typing this I am trying to not just break down and cry in a public place. The emotional pain is terrible. I have a horrible one year anniversary in 6 days to survive.

And with the holidays, all my mental health people will be on vacation and stuff so it's a great time to be on the verge of going weeeeeeeeeee!

I know I have weathered more then most, and I guess in a couple days I will pull it back together. Maybe, who knows anymore?
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Children will not remember you for the material things you provided but for the feeling that you cherished them - Richard L. Evans
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