court tomorrow

[sanne1116]

i'm nervous i have court tomorrow since my ex wants the child support modified........the state of Indiana is representing me....my ex has a lawyer....i'm going alone and of course, i never heard from the state and hope it isn't yet another continuance..

[Bluemoon]

Prayers and other good wishes comming your way. One good thing about being reped by the state is the state wants you to be financially solvent. They want him to help make your ends meet so that "they" don't have to.
When you go to court, don't try to look pretty, try to look clean, calm and POOR. Good luck!

[momofTDR]

LOL! clean, calm and POOR. I never thought of it that way Blue.

Let us know how it goes. I understand the whole "he has a lawyer, I don't" bit.

Prayers for you tomorrow

[LSL]

Great advice Blue---look like a mommy! Don't try to go in dressed to the nines with full blown make-up, jewelry, and so on. And Blue is right, the state wants you to be self-sufficient so they should do fine by you. Let us know.

[idig]

Look like a mommy. That is verbatim what I was advised for my court. Light makeup, tidy mom clothes.

[comingup4air]

GOOD luck. I was just there. I did have my own lawyer, but have witnessed proceedings where the State did the representing and the person made out GREAT. The hardest is to try and stay calm. The day WILL end and worrying about the outcome isn't going to change it. Also, definitely make sure you are prepared. Bring any paperwork you have been asked to. Be on time. Look like a MOM. You will be fine. Come back on and let us know how you do!!

[Christy2000]

Good luck! I have court tomorrow also, so I'm feeling all the emotions too! My ex hasn't paid child support for over a year & is trying to claim hardship to get out of having to pay even though last year he made alot of money and is trying to hide his finances.

[rhiansmoma]

Good luck & best wishes to both of you tomorrow.

[YJL279]

Good luck! I hope you both make out OK!

[confused1996]

Good luck....

[sanne1116]

thanks for the advice i am glad i got on the computer early, so i dressed down. i am so sore from my rheumatoid arthritis and my anxiety is at an all high. thanks for the support and i will try and give you the results of what happened when i get back.

i'm glad there is a community that is supportive. to all the women and men a big thanks. it should be about the children.

when i'm in less pain, i can give u a story about calling Child Protective Service and how the man berated me when I was just calling for information.........this one will make you laugh even though it was a sad situation.......

[comingup4air]

I hope you guys come back on and let us know how it goes. I know how awful it is....

[sanne1116]

i'm back and he still has to pay the same amount plus $600 in backpay. i'm satisfied even though he should've paid more in backpay. Greed gets you nowhere......his whiny lawyer tried saying he overpaid me by $3800....i wish that was the case.

thanks for all the good thoughts.....now it's party time: cracked open a can of Mountain Dew and getting ready to get the kids from school in a 1/2hour.......

[MotherBoard]

Sanne I so glad that it worked out, and glad that, that hurtle is over for ya.

[Christy2000]

Ok so I back from court... my lawyer was about to go in and he wanted to make a deal, he had all these papers claiming how poor he is and shows he owes owes $6000.00, he would only agreed to paying a hundred dollars a month to pay it down- my son will be driving by thetime its paid down! He will pay $400 per month for child support, so at least I'm getting that. Hes shoulg to be paying more but I accepted the deal cause his other wife has 2 kids and is next in line if I didn't I might get whats left after she goes to court which is next month so... its down from $700.00 per month. oh well now I'm just waiting for the lawyer bill!!!

[LSL]

Well, it may not be what you want, but here's the deal, my ex is only ordered to pay 143.00 a month, and somehow he can't even pay that.

[Dad1st4boys]

, my ex has to pay $30.00 a month and hates that.

[Christy2000]

K I shouldn't complain! I'm really happy to have an order that is current and family maintenance will deal with the rest!

[LSL]

Originally Posted by Christy2000

K I shouldn't complain! I'm really happy to have an order that is current and family maintenance will deal with the rest!

Aw, even 400 is not much when raising a child.....especially if he is in any kind of daycare!!!!! I laugh about my support amount. My daughter is a serious dancer.......that amount does not even pay for her dance tuition! Let alone anything else!

Child support is one of those things that is such a weird subject because it involves MONEY.......wanna start a fight with anyone, then owe them money and not pay it back, or bring up child support. Both are guarenteed to bring it on!

[Christy2000]

your so right! Soccer ,football its too expensive, I feel like I'm not giving him enough cause my parents could put me in whatever I wanted...but I have car payments mortgage, etc thats all my salary covers.

[LSL]

Any kind of sports is seriously expensive. I didn't do any of that as a child because my parents were never in the financial position to provide it. I am not really either. But, all the girls that are serious dancers at her studio, go off to college, get good grades and stay out of trouble. So, I figure I am investing in her future. At least I tell myself that when I pay her tuition, write the check for her 124.00 pointe shoes, and spend the countless hours running her here and there!!!!

[Christy2000]

Thats so good of you! 124 for shoes! wow-one of my daycare ladies had her son in dance & he went far got a few scholarships, he's in a few music videos she was a single parent, married now.

[LSL]

DD's feet are TINY....so her pointe shoes have to be custom made. And because they are satan, likely they will only last 6-8 months. UGH! She dances ballet, tap, hip-hop, modern, lyrical, and jazz and is a part of the performing company for the studio....so not only do we have to have pointe shoes, we have to have ballet flats, tap shoes, hip-hop sneakers, jazz shoes and dance paws. In August when we bought everything, the bill was close to 300 dollars! EEKS! Grandma buys some of her stuff and the ballet studio has a consignment shops, so sometimes I can get lightly used shoes for inexpensive.

[Christy2000]

just wait- it will all be worth it-though I'm sure you can already see that

[sanne1116]

i used the Deputy Prosecuting Atty to represent me.............so i have no lawyer fees. they represent you in court and they are from the state....i was lucky that my ex is going to pay the $600 when he files his taxes. i'm new to this site and glad i joined...

my ex kept slipping sometimes and mentioned over time so i told the Dep. Prosec. Atty and they pulled his wages. hope you have a good day and one hurtle for me is done.

welcome to the group. everyone seems nice and informative too.

[Bubba'sDad]

hey, i want child support too...no fair

[Dad1st4boys]

whooooHOOO!! I got the Jan CS check, $28.25 after the state takes out the processing fee. I think I'll run right out and buy a new car! Actually I'm saving it for gas money for the road trip to the Gulf Coast.

[sanne1116]

i hear ya. my friend uses some kind of place in northeast indiana and they go after the ex-bf and he pays about $50 to the place and she gets about $38 a month. but it's the principle. if we couldn't support our kids, the state would take them away. not sure about that either.......so sad!!!what are ur kids ages?

[Dad1st4boys]

My boys are 10, 13, 15, 16 what a day.

[sanne1116]

i thought it was hard with a 9 yr old girl, and a 7 yr old boy. I know you didn't sneeze, but God Bless You!!!!!!