Wild Dancing Thanksgivng Turkey Why am I a slob? - Single Parents Forum: Single Family Voices
All forums, topics and discussions are geared to single parents and the issues faced with single parenting.
Support a single parent today and one will support you back!
         


Go Back   Single Parents Forum: Single Family Voices >
(``'·.¸(``'·.¸ Tips, Tricks & Ideas ¸.·'´´)¸.·'´´)
> Home, Garden & Living > Home Improvement


~ Donate Today ~ PLEASE
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-28-2010, 01:38 AM   #1
LSL Female
The blunt one;)


 
LSL's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Somewhere on the left coast
Posts: 11,334
Rep Power: 411
LSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support Legend
humm Why am I a slob?

I want to turn a new leaf...... for months I was studying, so therefore I just did not care. But lately, I have had nothing but job hunting to do. And still, my house is disgusting. I sound crazy, but I just don't know how to keep up with everything. It's not like my days are so filled with tons of things to do. I feel kind of helpless. And stupid. I admit, I hate housework....

And A is a hurricane. As soon as everything is clean, she comes through with her trail of ____. I can't seem to get her to help around the house. I am just at my wits end. Truly.
__________________
“If your expectations aren’t to be the best, then… you know, nobody rises to low expectations.” - Chip Kelly, coach of Oregon Football.
LSL is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 02:01 AM   #2
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

LSL I can relate to it......esp with 3 boys. Do you have your daughter clean? Not just her room but other "common" areas? After their mom left I found myself trying to keep things neat and tidy so as to minimise her absence (LOL she was, as my brother says, a slovenly housekeeper). Then I realised, this is not a hotel, but a house. We are a family......so get moving boys! It cannot always fall to me.
My youngest is too short to put away dishes etc. so his job is to tidy living room while boys and I do dishes after dinner. He has to put away all the toys (which means proper place!) and keep coffee table free of newspapers, toys etc. They each have tasks to do outside of keeping their rooms clean. It helps.
In the winter since we heat with wood....on weekends they haul firewood, kindling, while I take out ashes. They must be involved.
As for my housekeeping...it's not the best either. During the school year, I work, come home, get dinner, do homework with them, spend some time with them in the evenings. Weekends are our "purge" times, massive undertakings.....done together. Doing it with them helps motivate me. And it shows them it takes all our efforts to make the house run smoothly.
I always say I own the house, it does not own me.
I also have two acres to take care of....so if I spend the day cutting firewood...dusting the living room must wait!
I think you break it into stuff you do everyday.....stuff you do evey week, and stuff you forget to do!

---------- Post added at 01:01 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:58 AM ----------

My boys were not wanting to help too much either.....till I made them. I just said why should I do it all while you guys play? Is that fair? etcetc. 3 boys and toilets make a mess.....I was tired of it. I made them take turns cleaning the bathrooms. Their aims got better right away. So if your daughter makes a trail of ____.........about face and pick it up. NOW. I am so pleased with the progress of the boys.
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 05:25 AM   #3
LadyDragon Female
Parent on Board
 
LadyDragon's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 155
Rep Power: 94
LadyDragon is just really nice
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

My, more so one than the other, boys also leave trails of ____, if it's not picked up when I'm ready to hoover, they lose it. It took a couple of good clear-outs before they copped on!
LadyDragon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 06:36 AM   #4
LSL Female
The blunt one;)


 
LSL's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Somewhere on the left coast
Posts: 11,334
Rep Power: 411
LSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

After much fighting tonight, she did clean up some of her mess. AND I asked her to unload the dishwasher and she did it without a peep. She doesn't seem to understand that I don't want her piles of stuff in my living room. I am sorry if her room is so messy that she doesn't know where to put it.

I actually do not ride her about her room. About once every three months I make her clean it, but otherwise, if she wants to live in that hole, fine, but close your door because I do not want to look at it. Besides my room is messy, and mom needs to set an example there before yelling at her. I am going to work on getting my house clean, organized, and everything put away during the nine days she is gone.
__________________
“If your expectations aren’t to be the best, then… you know, nobody rises to low expectations.” - Chip Kelly, coach of Oregon Football.
LSL is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 08:56 AM   #5
Bluemoon Female
just an old hippie chick

 
Bluemoon's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In the Mountains
Posts: 8,583
Rep Power: 362
Bluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Quote:
Originally Posted by LSL View Post
. I am going to work on getting my house clean, organized, and everything put away during the nine days she is gone.
I've been saying that for 3 years.
Currently I'm saying I'm gonna work on it this weekend....and look where I am instead.
__________________
Never grow a wishbone, Daughter, where your backbone ought to be. Clementine Paddleford


To disagree, one doesn't have to be disagreeable. ~Barry M. Goldwater and Jack Casserly, Goldwater


Life is all about how you handle Plan B. ~ off a Blue Mountain Arts calendar
Bluemoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 09:02 AM   #6
comingup4air Female
Putting my child first...

 
comingup4air's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Eastern MA
Posts: 3,519
Rep Power: 195
comingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Supportcomingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Supportcomingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Supportcomingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Supportcomingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Supportcomingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Supportcomingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Supportcomingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Supportcomingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Supportcomingup4air Is Rocken These Boards With Support
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

I have finally done something that will FORCE me to clean house. I have an appt. with 2 different consignment shops in the month of Sept. and one appt at a shop that buys things outright....AND I have told a friend that she can join me in a yard sale at my place. Maybe even 2...another one in late Fall. SO, now I have been going through stuff a little bit each night and it's amazing what we have accumulated, but also how dirty things can be. I want to feel relaxed when I walk in my home, not overwhelmed with stuff and no place to put anything.....I can't STAND it. SO....I am doing something about it. It takes time, but it's definitely gonna be worth it.
comingup4air is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 09:06 AM   #7
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Lady Dragon reminded me that if it is not picked up when it should be......I own it. They have to earn things back.
One thing that is not tolerated here is the line "I did it last time." If I need the dishes dried and I hear that line.....whoever says it is doing the work. I reply, "I washed EVERY time". I have a dishwasher which I have to hook up, but the same rules will apply to unloading itwhen I finally run the electrical connections to it.
My mother in law lives here and is partially disabled (part of foot removed). When she gets home from her shopping the boys now instinctively go out and carry in her groceries. I used to get complaints....then it was rumblings....downgraded to sighs...now they just do it. When it's done and she says thank you, they give her hugs. I want them to look beyond themselves, to see others in need. To be helpful. And by riding them, it seems to be working.
You must keep at it, and not give in to the rumblings and grumblings.
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 11:15 AM   #8
nadee_09 Female
At A loss for Words - NOT!

 
nadee_09's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Straight Ahead....
Posts: 1,607
Rep Power: 170
nadee_09 has a reputation beyond reputenadee_09 has a reputation beyond reputenadee_09 has a reputation beyond reputenadee_09 has a reputation beyond reputenadee_09 has a reputation beyond reputenadee_09 has a reputation beyond reputenadee_09 has a reputation beyond reputenadee_09 has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Today is the day I vowed to clean out the several toy boxes we have here. So far, I am still enjoying my coffee... I cringe at the thought of this, but I like everything to be neat and organized and in its own place. Before I had C I was VERY organized. Color cordinated, files for things,...Now, well I know where things are It just looks SO messy. I am clean mind you, I cannot stand a mess, but I will admit my organizational skills have gone to the wayside. I let things "pile up" that need to be organized and then usually when she is away, I clean house. I really should be having yard sales I could def use some extra money but to me that sometimes seems like way too much work and I quite often give things away to used stores. Oh the toy box...There are so many little toys that I need to do something with. Blah........
nadee_09 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 11:48 AM   #9
Dad1st4boys Male
Failure is not an Option.

 
Dad1st4boys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Western Plains area
Posts: 7,570
Rep Power: 302
Dad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of Support
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

I have set up a rotating schedule of chores. We swap every Sunday. I hear moans and groans. If their chores are not done then they don't leave the house after school or on weekends. Yesterday evening #1 had not done the dishes or cleaned the kitchen (I am picky about that room!). stood in the next room and told him to get it done or he won't leave the house......whoooooo the howling!!! "Dad, we have the full scrimmage and hotdog watermelon feed at the school." I just said well, you better get busy then. He got it all done in 10 min.
His brothers got busy too, I just looked at them

LSL, is this the same little gal who one day cleaned her room and around the house without being asked about 3 months ago?
Dad1st4boys is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 12:01 PM   #10
confused1996 Female
Board Beacon Parent

 
confused1996's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Saint John NB
Posts: 1,814
Rep Power: 178
confused1996 has a brilliant futureconfused1996 has a brilliant futureconfused1996 has a brilliant future
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Humm my house since school has been out is... Humm lets just say not up to my standards. When I leave in the morning all the dishes are done and counters are clean. I get home the sink is full and the counters look like someone had a food fight on them. grr My livingroom has become the 14 year olds bedroom/activity room. Unless he has friends then they go down to the familyroom. His room well lets just say he has one but it looks more like a catch all.
Yep I have said over and over again that I am going to crack down on the stinker and make him clean up. But when I call him from work and ask him a simple "Could you take the clothes I put on the line off and the load from the washer on?" and end up hearing Im tired and I dont feel good why are you such a nag?" and so on and so one. I just give up and take the clothes off the line when I get home. Put the other load on the line the next morning. Also clean the food fight and dishes in my kitchen. Sweep and maybe clean the bathroom if I still have the energy. All during the time he is sitting on the couch playing his game.
Yep the games this weekend are disappearing. Lets see what happens then. grr
confused1996 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 12:40 PM   #11
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Confused, if I ask them to pick stuff up and it's there after 3 requests....it's mine! It either gets pitched or they "buy it back" thru extra chores.
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 02:21 PM   #12
idig Female
SFV JUNKIE!!!

 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 6,665
Rep Power: 307
idig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

There was a time I would have been a lot less understanding teen tornado, no more. I swear my son is physically incapable of seeing a mess if it is not spelled out. I do remember the girls hitting this stage too, though.

Frankly, these days I choose my battles. The ones I choose take all the energy I have for it. The common ares must be kept cleaned, but I still have to stay on him. I can take something really important away and it sticks for a week or two, then am right back taking it away again. He has a couple of rooms he can mostly keep as messy as he wants as long as food is not involved.

Muskie and Dad, I love you both, really I do. But frankly I just want to blow you both a big ol' raspberry right now for having it that well under control without constant reminders!

---------- Post added at 12:21 PM ---------- Previous post was at 12:19 PM ----------

Oh, and as for me, I can take clutter and mess to a point. I try and make sure I vacuum and clean the bathrooms every weekend. Dusting happens when it happens, when it gets on my nerves. Clutter just is. Our home is lived in, no doubt!
__________________
Sure as night will follow day. Most things I worry about. Never happen anyway. ~ Tom Petty
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 02:28 PM   #13
Dad1st4boys Male
Failure is not an Option.

 
Dad1st4boys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Western Plains area
Posts: 7,570
Rep Power: 302
Dad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of Support
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Idig, , I wish it was that easy!!. I do have to be consistent, even with me. I have to remind them at least one of then at least once a day. he others seem to get the hint. BUT on occasion they all team up. Then I remind them this house is a Dictatorship and I am the Tyrant in Charge.
Dad1st4boys is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 02:29 PM   #14
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Idig it ebbs and flows, believe me. However, since they know I back up my threats.....they know when I say "clean up" that I mean it. I wish they took more initiative on things.....but they do pretty well, all things considered.
I must admit, I don't see a lot of things others prob. would. One time my sister in law came here and she saw this cobweb in the stairway...."what's that doing there?" I said I was waiting for it to get bigger so I could reach it. LOL
I look at it this way....the house will always need something being done, even if I finished my list.....but my kids are young for only so long. So, if it's a choice between having some fun with them or dusting the living room......guess what we do?
Like I said, we own the house, it doesn't own us.
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 02:42 PM   #15
Bluemoon Female
just an old hippie chick

 
Bluemoon's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In the Mountains
Posts: 8,583
Rep Power: 362
Bluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

I'm not even sure I own my house anymore. I think the ants do.
E is their little personal cafeteria manager. He feeds them very well.
__________________
Never grow a wishbone, Daughter, where your backbone ought to be. Clementine Paddleford


To disagree, one doesn't have to be disagreeable. ~Barry M. Goldwater and Jack Casserly, Goldwater


Life is all about how you handle Plan B. ~ off a Blue Mountain Arts calendar
Bluemoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 02:43 PM   #16
Dad1st4boys Male
Failure is not an Option.

 
Dad1st4boys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Western Plains area
Posts: 7,570
Rep Power: 302
Dad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of Support
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

I have a few cob webs too. We live in a home, not a museum. But I am picky about the kitchen and bathrooms.
Dad1st4boys is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 02:46 PM   #17
confused1996 Female
Board Beacon Parent

 
confused1996's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Saint John NB
Posts: 1,814
Rep Power: 178
confused1996 has a brilliant futureconfused1996 has a brilliant futureconfused1996 has a brilliant future
hi2 Re: Why am I a slob?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dad1st4boys View Post
I have a few cob webs too. We live in a home, not a museum. But I am picky about the kitchen and bathrooms.
A man after my heart.
confused1996 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 03:28 PM   #18
LSL Female
The blunt one;)


 
LSL's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Somewhere on the left coast
Posts: 11,334
Rep Power: 411
LSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Idig, I love muskie and dad1st BUT: There is a well documented psychological phenomena, and I am not joking, children responding better to an irritated male voice. When we women do it, it is "nagging."

As for the girl who cleaned....she went out the door after three weeks. And I was right she wanted new clothes and to go shopping.

I tolerate clutter, I do. But this last bout of messy house was too much. I could not find the source of something that smelled really bad. Really bad. I am not sure I found it per se, as much as I covered it with clean smell.

I think that I get overwhelmed.

I need to ride A harder about picking up after herself. She literally will unwrap something and drop the wrapper on the floor, and it is like it does not click in her head that this is unacceptable. UGH! I am just tired of that attitude. So now I have become a bit of a nazi on that. My first question is: Why did you do that? her: What? Me: Look on the floor/table/couch and tell me what is wrong with that picture? Sometimes she does not see it.
__________________
“If your expectations aren’t to be the best, then… you know, nobody rises to low expectations.” - Chip Kelly, coach of Oregon Football.
LSL is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 03:37 PM   #19
Dad1st4boys Male
Failure is not an Option.

 
Dad1st4boys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Western Plains area
Posts: 7,570
Rep Power: 302
Dad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of SupportDad1st4boys Has a SFV Diamond Heart of Support
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Trash on floor is totally unacceptable. If they drop a wrapper, I walk up and take the item that came for the wrapper. It is mine until the trash is picked up.
Dad1st4boys is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 04:03 PM   #20
Virgo69 Female
A Cuddly Porcupine

 
Virgo69's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: pennsylvania
Posts: 1,179
Rep Power: 143
Virgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an AngelVirgo69 Has Heart and Soul of an Angel
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

I am trying to start some good habits with my 1 yr old now. We sing the clean up song and put our toys away before bed every night. I'm hoping that with early intervention, I might be able to dodge some of the teen age hurricane down the road.

Its taken me a long time to restore order to my home. I had to let a lot of things go because we need the space and I figure if I didn't need it for the last three years, do I really need it now? Were there a few items worth keeping among the piles that weren't, sure...but I have limited time to clean so I must limit what I keep.

I also have a rule that if something new comes in, then something old has to go out in its place. For example, new shirt....must get rid of one old shirt. Doesn't sound like much but it has helped me to prevent things from piling up again...I also take pictures of my progress as I go along...the before and after shots help me keep motivated.

Last thing I keep in mind is that if I want my daughter to socialize and bring people over, we must have a presentable house and I'm sure that time will come. So in your daughter's case, does having her friends see her be sloppy make her want to be a neater person? maybe you can work that angle?
__________________
Children will not remember you for the material things you provided but for the feeling that you cherished them - Richard L. Evans
Virgo69 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 04:09 PM   #21
LSL Female
The blunt one;)


 
LSL's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Somewhere on the left coast
Posts: 11,334
Rep Power: 411
LSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Oh, she doesn't care what her friends think. And when our house is icky because of her mess, she can't have friends over....period. I do not want someone coming in my house during these times and thinking I live that way. No way Jose. Ugh.

The funny thing about her, she will go to a friends house and help them clean all day, but not do her own house.......geez louise.
__________________
“If your expectations aren’t to be the best, then… you know, nobody rises to low expectations.” - Chip Kelly, coach of Oregon Football.
LSL is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 04:14 PM   #22
idig Female
SFV JUNKIE!!!

 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 6,665
Rep Power: 307
idig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Good luck, V. Been there done that. M was great as a little guy, then adolescence ate his brain

---------- Post added at 02:14 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:11 PM ----------

LSL, I totally know what you mean by it not clicking. I went through this with both girls and now M. It's the age! Once I spell it out he gets it, sort of. Endlessly frustrating.

Last night my den was covered in papers, backpacks, remotes, clothes, you name. Every sitting surface was covered and part of the floor. I told him to get in there and clean his mess up right then. A minute later he came back in the kitchen and asked what mess I meant!!! Really?? He wasn't being sarcastic either, it truly doesn't click!
__________________
Sure as night will follow day. Most things I worry about. Never happen anyway. ~ Tom Petty
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 05:05 PM   #23
confused1996 Female
Board Beacon Parent

 
confused1996's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Saint John NB
Posts: 1,814
Rep Power: 178
confused1996 has a brilliant futureconfused1996 has a brilliant futureconfused1996 has a brilliant future
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Yep Im with Idig V I did that with Ry and he was awesome until I swear the lazy teen thing started. grr
Idig Ry does the same. Oh as for the kitchen thing every day I get "Stop being a spaz mom its only dishes." nope he doesnt see the food all over the counter or the slop on the floor nope for some reason Im making it all up.
Hey dad or muskie you wanna come here and try the male thing.
confused1996 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 05:07 PM   #24
LSL Female
The blunt one;)


 
LSL's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Somewhere on the left coast
Posts: 11,334
Rep Power: 411
LSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

We are now arguing about the trash. I need help taking out the kitty litter, trash bag, and recyclables. She is refusing. I said, "Fine, you are not allowed to throw anything away then. You much just put it in your room when you have waste." Her: "Whatever." But she is going to get off her ___ and help me.
__________________
“If your expectations aren’t to be the best, then… you know, nobody rises to low expectations.” - Chip Kelly, coach of Oregon Football.
LSL is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 06:43 PM   #25
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

LSL I know this is easy to say....but how can a kid refuse? I know mine are younger and not at the teenager stage (ahhhhhh!) but to refuse? I cannot fathom my kid refusing. It would not be tolerated. Maybe it is a male thing, the tone of the voice or whatever. It's also a proven record of I will back up what I say. If they unwrapped something and dropped the wrapper......it's gone. They didn't earn the snack.
My kids are kids, they don't see messes the way adults do. But some things are just not tolerable.
LSL and Confused you both wrote today that your kids "refused" to do something. Honestly, and I mean no disrespect here, but how does a kid refuse? You ask them to move dirt and they look at you and say NO? If they do, is it a stand off? A staring contest? I'm not being dumb here, I just cannot imagine this. Mumbling and grumbling I understand, it's the refusal.
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 06:50 PM   #26
idig Female
SFV JUNKIE!!!

 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 6,665
Rep Power: 307
idig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

M has never refused either. Maybe it just hasn't happened yet. I know life as he knows it would cease. But I also know he is easier than a lot of kids. The worst possible thing for him is to feel like he has disappointed or hurt someone he loves. Don't get me wrong, he grumbles and tests boundaries. He tries to put things off (and sometimes succeeds), but when it comes down to it he knows it's a losing proposition to get in a battle of the wills.

There but by the grace of God go I. I long ago realized that all kids are different, and some will be way more challenging than mine ever were about those sorts of things.
__________________
Sure as night will follow day. Most things I worry about. Never happen anyway. ~ Tom Petty
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 07:56 PM   #27
Bluemoon Female
just an old hippie chick

 
Bluemoon's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In the Mountains
Posts: 8,583
Rep Power: 362
Bluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Oh....they can refuse. They can sit down and just plain refuse to move no matter what they lose over it. No matter what you do to them. You can physically pick them up and move them somewhere else if you have the desire, but you cannot make the little fingers and the little legs do the things you want them to unless the little mind cooperates.
You cannot make a child go to sleep, to put it another way. You could knock them unconscious, but you cannot actually make them go to sleep, or even really try.

You cannot make a child eat. You can force feed them through medical means if it comes down to it, but that is not voluntary on their part. It would get food in them, but you still would not have actually forced them to eat.

Most kids would rather give in and do the things you ask rather than lose other things they want or suffer through some other kind of punishment, but ultimately, if they really would rather NOT do whatever you are asking more than anything else, if getting their way and winning the battle means more to them than the casualties of war, you cannot make them physically DO very much of anything. Therefore, they CAN refuse.

To be fair, I didn't used to be able to fathom a child taking it that far either, until I had E.
__________________
Never grow a wishbone, Daughter, where your backbone ought to be. Clementine Paddleford


To disagree, one doesn't have to be disagreeable. ~Barry M. Goldwater and Jack Casserly, Goldwater


Life is all about how you handle Plan B. ~ off a Blue Mountain Arts calendar
Bluemoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 08:08 PM   #28
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

I know every kid is different. I have just never had one refuse. Grumble? Sure. Test boundaries? Of course. But to refuse? And then to continue watching tv or whatever expecting I will do the work alone? No way, not here. I have never ever had a showdown with them. Hope if it ever happens I can handle it!
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 08:30 PM   #29
Bluemoon Female
just an old hippie chick

 
Bluemoon's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In the Mountains
Posts: 8,583
Rep Power: 362
Bluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Who said they get to watch TV or whatever they want?
They go in their rooms with nothing. You have to physically put them there, but in they go. Door locked from the outside. Then they go out the window.........and repeat.
__________________
Never grow a wishbone, Daughter, where your backbone ought to be. Clementine Paddleford


To disagree, one doesn't have to be disagreeable. ~Barry M. Goldwater and Jack Casserly, Goldwater


Life is all about how you handle Plan B. ~ off a Blue Mountain Arts calendar
Bluemoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 08:31 PM   #30
idig Female
SFV JUNKIE!!!

 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 6,665
Rep Power: 307
idig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

and into the poo

---------- Post added at 06:31 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:31 PM ----------

Blue, E is just going out the window, M has decided he can jump off the roof!!
__________________
Sure as night will follow day. Most things I worry about. Never happen anyway. ~ Tom Petty
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 08:33 PM   #31
Bluemoon Female
just an old hippie chick

 
Bluemoon's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In the Mountains
Posts: 8,583
Rep Power: 362
Bluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Quote:
Originally Posted by idig View Post
and into the poo

---------- Post added at 06:31 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:31 PM ----------

Blue, E is just going out the window, M has decided he can jump off the roof!!
E would be too scared to jump off the roof. Maybe next time I should put him up there!
__________________
Never grow a wishbone, Daughter, where your backbone ought to be. Clementine Paddleford


To disagree, one doesn't have to be disagreeable. ~Barry M. Goldwater and Jack Casserly, Goldwater


Life is all about how you handle Plan B. ~ off a Blue Mountain Arts calendar
Bluemoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 08:34 PM   #32
idig Female
SFV JUNKIE!!!

 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 6,665
Rep Power: 307
idig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Ahh, just give it a couple of years and suddenly he'll think it's a good idea.
__________________
Sure as night will follow day. Most things I worry about. Never happen anyway. ~ Tom Petty
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 08:35 PM   #33
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

For serious challenges I make them sit in the hallway. No toys no nothing. No fun. My guys love going on the roof......if I am up there I must always watch behind me.
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 08:41 PM   #34
Bluemoon Female
just an old hippie chick

 
Bluemoon's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: In the Mountains
Posts: 8,583
Rep Power: 362
Bluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support LegendBluemoon Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Quote:
Originally Posted by muskiedad View Post
For serious challenges I make them sit in the hallway. No toys no nothing. No fun. My guys love going on the roof......if I am up there I must always watch behind me.
How do you make them stay there, Muskie? Do you stand over them and physically bar them from moving? If it was E you would have to.

I'm not argueing...I'm just looking for ways I haven't thought of yet. Like the poo, .

I was kidding about the roof, of course. He wouldn't jump down, but he would almost certainly fall down.

Really though, I often wonder if E would be different with a man. I have never had the opportunity to see him be disciplined by a man....well, there was the school principle last year. He didn't impress E too much.
He was unable to make E leave the classroom and come to the office. Couldn't make him stand up and walk. He had to drag E out of the classroom, desk and all! That's right. E refused.
__________________
Never grow a wishbone, Daughter, where your backbone ought to be. Clementine Paddleford


To disagree, one doesn't have to be disagreeable. ~Barry M. Goldwater and Jack Casserly, Goldwater


Life is all about how you handle Plan B. ~ off a Blue Mountain Arts calendar
Bluemoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 09:16 PM   #35
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

The only time my kids have refused....was scary. My oldest had a breakdown at school and was banging his head on the wall. Had to rush in and take him to ER. It was all related to his mother leaving...but his eyes were bulging and he refused to come to me. I said to the principal..."here goes nothing!" and I just grabbed him in a bear hug and threw him over my shoulder. Once I plunked him into the truck he just broke down crying. This incident though was explainable. Hopefully one of a kind.
I honestly think there must be something in "the father" figure. The tone of the voice? Not sure. Maybe it's the physical presence? Are fathers more intimidating?
If they sit in the hall they stay. Oh they may creep out and ask if they can have another chance etc....and if they correct the behaviour, they can. I know this sounds naive, but it would never occur to me that they would not stay where they were supposed to!
Please don't think I am trumpeting my kids as perfect or anything. They are far from it. The other night when getting laundry ready my 4 yr old had to get his done. This means making sure socks are not in little balls, rightside out, and same with all clothes, rightside out. He cried and cried that his clothes were too heavy LOL. I said they could watch a cartoon, have a snack and then off to bed. He wasted so much time, he finally got out of there had his snack just as the cartoon was over. He cried even louder....but I told him, I did not waste the time he did. He said next time he would hurry. So he "got it". Question is will he remember it?
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 09:30 PM   #36
idig Female
SFV JUNKIE!!!

 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 6,665
Rep Power: 307
idig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

See it wouldn't occur to me either. I can't fathom. If nothing you said or did worked, what would you do?
__________________
Sure as night will follow day. Most things I worry about. Never happen anyway. ~ Tom Petty
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 09:58 PM   #37
momofTDR Female
Marja

 
momofTDR's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Pocatello, Idaho
Posts: 1,392
Rep Power: 144
momofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With SupportmomofTDR Is Rocken These Boards With Support
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

If I just have my two little ones, we do better. Throw my oldest in the mix and I'm a total failure.

I can't keep a clean house....and I don't care either! LOL! I like it tidy...and I like my kitchen and bathroom clean, but beyond that, well, it typically could use some TLC. I did do one thing to help me keep on top of it. I scheduled a small group (Bible Study) at my house on Wednesdays. I have to clean at least one day a week.
momofTDR is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2010, 10:18 PM   #38
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

So far all I've had to do is up the ante....and they capitulate. It's not just taking stuff away, it is reasoning with them too. When I hear "It's not fair..." I usually stop and say "You are right, it is not fair! It's not fair that I just did everyone's laundry, made breakfast lunch and dinner etc etc. It's not fair, let's make it fair.....how much of the workload will you take up to make it fair????" That usually works.
Of course, the teenage years are ahead of me.
But given tasks they usually help....
I do remember a bumper sticker I saw once "Dust: a phenomenon only woman can see" That may not be entirely true, but I think living in an all male household our standards are different! LOL
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-29-2010, 12:25 AM   #39
LSL Female
The blunt one;)


 
LSL's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Somewhere on the left coast
Posts: 11,334
Rep Power: 411
LSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support LegendLSL Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

The refusing to do things are recent events. She has shot up 6 inches over the summer. She is now 4 inches shorter than me, and I only outweigh her by maybe 35-40 pounds. She is all muscle, having danced and being very, very strong.

I can threaten, I can take things, I can ground....but if she refuses to do something, what can I do? If she sits there and says nope, not going to do it --- I can no longer pick her up and throw her over my shoulder like I use to be able to do.

We have rules. I am a pretty consistent and strict parent. For the most part we get along just fine. But during the last couple months, since she has closed the size and strength gap, she has started really challenging me.

I give her ample opportunity to do what she needs to do, but outright refusal causes issues for her. Today it was this: Fine you don't want to take out the trash, I don't want to waste my time and money tomorrow taking you to the airport. Her: You can't do that. You have to take me. Me: No I do not.. But I tell you what, Ill take you if you pay me. Because you know, I seem to be your maid, taxi, and bank all in one. And I am tired of it. So get up off your ___ and help me take the trash out, or I won't take you to the airport without you paying me an hourly wage and the federal vehicle expense per mile. That should run you 75.00.

And because I am consistent, guess what, she thought I was serious. Actually, I was. She said nothing else, grumbled, ed, whined under her breath and took the garbage up.
__________________
“If your expectations aren’t to be the best, then… you know, nobody rises to low expectations.” - Chip Kelly, coach of Oregon Football.
LSL is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-29-2010, 01:01 AM   #40
muskiedad Male
the one who babbles

 
muskiedad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: ontario
Posts: 6,125
Rep Power: 305
muskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legendmuskiedad Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Maybe shortly before she is to go to the airport you just say "Not going to do it, don't want to." Just so she knows what it's like.
muskiedad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-29-2010, 10:28 AM   #41
LadyDragon Female
Parent on Board
 
LadyDragon's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 155
Rep Power: 94
LadyDragon is just really nice
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

LSL, that was the answer I gave mine, you say no - I say no and it seems to work.

One evening I was cleaning up around me before going to bed and found sweetie papers on the floor. I got him (knew who it was) out of bed and made him come through and pick it up. There was alot of grumbling as one could imagine but he picked it up. (Mind, this is not saying that it will not happen again)

I think it's definatly an age thing. It's as if teenagers have to test their parents out - how far can I push them, how far can I go before they crack.

I couldn't believe it either, that a kid could 'refuse', but boy oh boy teenagers of the 21st century! If we'd done the same, my old man would have moved us with a swift kick up the back-side and that would have been the last time you ever said No, I'm not doing it! I wouldn't even try that one, would end up falling on my own arse in the attempt for starters.

I'v found, as much as they've argued at times over a situation, as long as I stand my ground, stick to the boundries set, they back down, they stop. Fine, they go off with not a bother in the world. If any punishment is set, it's been, eventually, accepted and carried through. Like Muskiedad said, ya just gotta stand by your word. (and then have a cold beer and wonder what the ____ just happened there)

Mine were sweeties, polite, tidy, abliging, thoughtful, mummy just knew everything and could do anything. Na ya, perhaps those days will come back again, until then ...
LadyDragon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-29-2010, 10:31 AM   #42
idig Female
SFV JUNKIE!!!

 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 6,665
Rep Power: 307
idig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legendidig Is a SFV Support Legend
Default Re: Why am I a slob?

Quote:
ya just gotta stand by your word. (and then have a cold beer and wonder what the ____ just happened there)
That is the TRUTH
__________________
Sure as night will follow day. Most things I worry about. Never happen anyway. ~ Tom Petty
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes


Resources: youngrobin.com
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:44 AM.

Some parent places to visit:
A Single Parents
Parent Arium
Solo Parents
Single Parent Personal Ads



Go Like Us On Facebook = facebook.com/SoloParent
Go Like Us On Facebook = facebook.com/SingleParentsInformation
Powered by vbulletin

All forums, topics and discussions are geared to single parents and the issues faced with single parenting.
Support a single parent today and one will support you back!

A Community for single parents, step parents and blended families

Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.