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Old 10-14-2013, 12:56 PM   #1
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curse What can be done?

So I'm pretty much hopping mad.

I picked R up last night, and I guess since things aren’t hostile with us, the ex feels less drive to meet the standards of care for him, or something (I don’t know….I’m trying to find a reason for this!!)

I pick him up, and he’s FILTHY. His clothes, and dirt plastered to his cheeks. Dirt caked under his nails. I know he is a boy, and he will get dirty, but this was excessive. It really didn’t look as though he had been bathed even once. He immediately clung to me like a monkey and wouldn’t kiss his bio dad goodbye.

As soon as I get him in the car, R announces he’s hungry. I ask the ex if he’s fed him (as he is supposed to) and he shrugged and said “I gave him a piece of cheese”.

So I get R something to eat. He eats, and as soon as he gets something in his belly, promptly falls asleep 3 hours before his bedtime (indication to me that he is off his schedule and exhausted).

When we get home even though he is fast asleep, a bath is a must (he looked like Pigpen from Charlie Brown, literally). J gives him a quick shower and I get him out. As I am drying him off, I notice his diaper area, and I am AGHAST.

HIS WHOLE little B U M is broken out, diaper rash on top of eczema breakouts. I turn him over, and yup, more of the same on his groin. The patches on his little ____ are scabbed over in places- so he has been itching it for at least a day. After documenting I applied his eczema scrip cream, eczema lotion, and Vaseline to the whole area to relieve the itch and hopefully heal it up.

This is the sixth or seventh incident of sheer neglect. I have documented every time. This one is on a par with the collar of eczema for egregiousness.

Is it worth taking to court? What would be a likely outcome for that? I just don’t know what to do but I can’t keep sending him knowing this is going on.
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Old 10-14-2013, 01:35 PM   #2
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Default Re: What can be done?

Do you have pictures? If you do, CPS is the next logical step in my opinion followed by a motion to modify asking for supervised parenting time until father takes some parenting classes.
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Old 10-14-2013, 02:49 PM   #3
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Default Re: What can be done?

Yes, I do have pictures.
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Old 10-14-2013, 02:55 PM   #4
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Default Re: What can be done?

Keep taking the pics and do good documentation.
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Old 10-14-2013, 03:04 PM   #5
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Default Re: What can be done?

I am, I just have been doing it so long, and things come and go- his eczema is starting to resurface as it gets drier and colder.
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Old 10-14-2013, 03:23 PM   #6
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Default Re: What can be done?

And always feel free to take him to the er or ped for those really nasty rashes...the more documentation the better!
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Old 10-14-2013, 03:46 PM   #7
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Default Re: What can be done?

This time, I'm not sure it qualifies for a ped visit, and we are moving- so the $$$ (usually $85) is not necessarily warranted if I know that I can clear it on my own.

Esp since ex couldn't be bothered to pay more than $20 this month in CS.
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Old 10-14-2013, 06:36 PM   #8
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Default Re: What can be done?

Yeah, that makes sense. Keep the photo docs going though.
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Old 10-14-2013, 08:57 PM   #9
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Default Re: What can be done?

I would look into a local walk-in clinic, or the school nurse. This way you have a non bias party as a witness. It may be worth having a CC# just for this type of situation. Maybe if he ever hits the lottery, you could get that money back !?

Just to add to the other ideas.

this just breaks my heart
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Old 04-26-2014, 11:42 AM   #10
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Default Re: What can be done?

Poor baby that is just ty parenting, how hard is it to simply feed a child or changer the diaper? I have a cousin that was raising her brothers and sisters when she was 6 changing diapers and feeding them on her own. And your telling me a grown man can't that is just sad!
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