Wild Dancing Thanksgivng Turkey Living with Parent who thinks her stuff don't stink - Single Parents Forum: Single Family Voices
All forums, topics and discussions are geared to single parents and the issues faced with single parenting.
Support a single parent today and one will support you back!
         


Go Back   Single Parents Forum: Single Family Voices >
(``'·.¸(``'·.¸ Relationships¸.·'´´)¸.·'´´)
> Your Parents as Single Parents


~ Donate Today ~ PLEASE
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 11-22-2005, 04:34 PM   #1
Blindsky75
At A loss for Words - NOT!

 
Blindsky75's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: The Looney Bin
Posts: 1,937
Rep Power: 0
Blindsky75 is an unknown quantity at this point
Default

I'm ready to pack my bags today and go to a shelter. The abuse I'm having to take from my mother every 2 weeks is nearly impossible. I'm supposed to keep my stress levels down so that I don't become more ill. She is the entire cause of my stress these days.

A simple thing I do or say comes back at me two days later. Conversations she doesn't want to have she'll just leave in the middle of. She says I don't show her respect but leaves while I'm still talking? I'm furious right now!

How the ____ am I supposed to put up with this for another few months???????? I need help. I need ways of dealing with this---I cannot hold this in much longer.
Blindsky75 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-22-2005, 05:15 PM   #2
t&j's mom
On the Board
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Texas
Posts: 81
Rep Power: 0
t&j's mom is an unknown quantity at this point
Default

Blindsky75. I understand your agony. I lived with my sister for 3 or 4 months after my break up 5 1/2 years ago and I was very stressed out. It's not because it escalated to confrontation or anything, but she tried to incorporate her parenting style on me and did things to me and my kids according to "her ways." We never argued and I tried not to show the frustration (and believe me, I was furious at that time), but I knew I had to live in my own place before anything happened that would ruin our relationship. Saving money on rent was not worth jeopardizing my relationship with my sister...... and my kids continuing to feel uncomfortable.

I moved out into my own apartment and preserved my relationship with my sister. But if I had stayed any longer things would've gotten real bad. I probably wouldn't as close to my nieces as I am today either.

How much longer do you need to stay with her? If you can afford to move out on your own right now, I would say to do it. The stress is not worth the money. Try as much as possible NOT to get into an argument with your mom. It only makes matters worse.

I feel for you. As you kow, you can always vent on us!!
t&j's mom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-22-2005, 11:14 PM   #3
dalilamakarma
Setting New Standards

 
dalilamakarma's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Iowa
Posts: 1,113
Rep Power: 0
dalilamakarma is an unknown quantity at this point
Default

B, I wish I had an answer for you, I feel so bad for you, parent's should be supportive of their children, and understanding, not judgemental. Can you go to the state and ask for an emergency hearing for assistance. Or is'nt there a friend that you can talk to about help. I feel bad cause I don't know your whole story and I don't want to be pushy, are you getting support from the kids' dads. I guess all I can do is tell you that you and your kids are in my thoughts and prayers.

I hope you can find away to get through all that for your kids sake.

If you ever need to vent, you can pm me or im me, I would be more than happy to give you my yahoo im handle if you ever want it.

Dali
dalilamakarma is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-23-2005, 12:46 AM   #4
tomany2count
Visitor
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Oh B I am so sorry to hear you are having difficulties. I know this has been a very long road for you. Keep on venting to us, we are glad to listen.

I don't know your situation and it is much more difficult when you are living there. But I do know with my own Mom it helped me to try taking things she says differently and just accepting that she will never see things as I do. My Mom has passed now but it did help our relationship.
I don't know if this is any help but I do feel for you. There is a book called "How one of you can bring the two of you together" by Susan Page. It is suppose to be for married couples but really helps hit on different ways of comunicating and changing your own reaction to help change the other persons. It really can be used for any relationship.
I do wish you the best, God bless and still lots of prayers for you and yours.
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-23-2005, 09:12 AM   #5
Blindsky75
At A loss for Words - NOT!

 
Blindsky75's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: The Looney Bin
Posts: 1,937
Rep Power: 0
Blindsky75 is an unknown quantity at this point
Default

The stubborn side of me says to buy the book for my Mom for Christmas. Course she'd think it was for her marriage too.

I do realize that she'll never see things my way, but she warps things that she says in her own head to make a problem sometimes that didn't even exist. It's like I've taken my Dad's old role in the house--I'm her dumping ground. I didn't marry her, and I'm too darn strong to let someone try to break me down with it.

My next court date for paternity/child support isn't until Feb 2nd. Lil B's dad of course denied paternity in our hearing earlier this month so it was another 3 or 4 months before we can keep things moving along. I get a support check once a month from Sierra's Dad, but not exactly sure what will happen once he's out of training and on part-time basis (if he can't find full time here locally)with the Nat'l Guard.

I have an application coming to me from the subsidized housing just North of here my Nanny told me about. For a 3 bdrm the wait is only 90-120 days, but my Nanny got the 90 days. A two bedroom is 30-90 and the lady said that its been the shorter of the two. They don't take dogs unless they are for disability reasons. I wonder if there is a way to get Hank certified as my therapy for walking and good state of mind? I love him so, I can't imagine a day w/o him.

What bothers me so much about my living situation is that I'm trying so hard not to make any waves around here. I'm trying so hard to be the polite house guest, and my mother is trying very hard to treat me like her child living under her roof and reign. I just want to have her hypnotized into thinking I'm not her daughter for a while. She treats strangers better.
Blindsky75 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-01-2006, 01:42 AM   #6
Amanda79
Board Blazen Parent
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Baltimore, MD
Posts: 413
Rep Power: 0
Amanda79 is an unknown quantity at this point
Default

Blindsky !
I HEAR YOU LOUD AND CLEAR ! !
I ahve been back home for over 3 years now and it sucks ! ! But I am fed up too ! My parents think that I shouldnt allow my kids to see their father at all ! I dont agree with that ! YES maybe I shouldnt bend over backwards for him to see them but I feel that I need to do what I feel is reasonable to see them !
AS to your Mom treating you like a child again I feel that too ! I cant believe that I am 26 and still have to report where I am going, who I am going with and all that BS ! ! I thought that I was older than that and didnt need to do it anymore ! ! Oh well ! We just need to **** it up and deal with it ! It will work out eventually !
At least we can hope ! !
Amanda79 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-01-2006, 02:02 PM   #7
Lurch
At A loss for Words - NOT!

 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Reno, NV
Posts: 1,403
Rep Power: 0
Lurch is an unknown quantity at this point
Default

Sorry to hear you guys have overbarring parents. My dad try's that stuff on me sometimes, corse he is a less then great parent, so I take it in context. I about clobbered him on Thx giving, he told me if anything happens he could take samantha, but not the other girl. I just looked at him, wondering where he comes up with that stuff. He has allways played favorites, real stupid I think. Thankfully I don't live with him. Hope everything works out B and Amanda.
Lurch is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes


Resources: youngrobin.com
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
My son thinks life is better at dad's even though it really isn't. bc 20 Something Single Moms 28 12-11-2009 08:12 PM
she thinks she can take our son Still trying Ex's 5 01-18-2009 06:04 PM
y doesn't his **** stink...? peppermintgrl Interracial Single Families 5 02-22-2007 04:48 PM
I stink! bnhgal Pregnant and Alone 4 05-05-2005 08:59 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:19 AM.

Some parent places to visit:
A Single Parents
Parent Arium
Solo Parents
Single Parent Personal Ads



Go Like Us On Facebook = facebook.com/SoloParent
Go Like Us On Facebook = facebook.com/SingleParentsInformation
Powered by vbulletin

All forums, topics and discussions are geared to single parents and the issues faced with single parenting.
Support a single parent today and one will support you back!

A Community for single parents, step parents and blended families

Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.