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Old 04-04-2014, 05:48 PM   #1
onefinewoman Female
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whoopdedoo Oh how much....

I detest having to rely on EX for anything at all. It is always a cluster____. Some day soon, Universe, please let me get to the point of self-reliance I crave and am working so hard to attain. I know it will reduce the screaming in my brain.
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Old 04-04-2014, 06:16 PM   #2
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Default Re: Oh how much....

It will happen one day OFW. Just keep doing what you're doing and one day it won't even matter if he's around or not! BTW they hate it when they can't get under your skin.
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Old 04-04-2014, 11:51 PM   #3
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Default Re: Oh how much....

Ive come to the conclusion that its not that it gets better, but that we become better at dealing with it.
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Old 04-05-2014, 04:30 AM   #4
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Default Re: Oh how much....

I have maintained a friendly face in his presence, but my feelings have NEVER been more at odds with how I behave. If we did not have kids together, I would give him an enormous verbal smackdown and then walk away and never speak to him again. Interacting with him is a constant practice in letting go of the anger. He is so good at giving me reasons to feel it.

The ways he has let me down, let his children down, over the years are deplorable. I can only shield her from so much pain, and she has begun to find out on her own, at 5, that she cannot trust his word.

I have full physical custody and we have shared legal. I am financially dependent on him until I graduate and get a good job.
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