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Old 08-20-2011, 08:20 PM   #1
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Default College?

Ok, so I am now 32 weeks pregnant, before I found out I was going to be a mom I was planning on attending community collage to get a 2 year degree. Now I'm not sure if I should still try to go after that dream. Im worried that it will all be to much trying to care for a baby, work and go to school. I'm caught between really wanting to continue my education and spending as much of my time as i can working and taking care/bonding with my little girl. I don't want to start something i can't finish. All of this makes me so ticked at my ex for leaving me in this situation, he is to busy getting high to help me with money or babysitting ( not that i would trust him to take care of her anyway). So I'm forced to try to figure all this out on my own as far as what will be best for me and my baby's future. Will someone thats been in a similar situation give me some advice?
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Old 08-20-2011, 10:04 PM   #2
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Default Re: Collage?

I would suggest that you try to take just a few courses in the beginning. Online classes might even be a better option for you or a class that's one night a week if you have childcare. The type of financial aid you apply for will determine how many hours of study you must be enrolled in per semester to continue to qualify. I think your best place to start is to check out financial aid, see what type of childcare arrangements you can make, and remember that just because its a two year degree doesn't mean you have to complete it in two years.

There's nothing wrong with just plugging away at it. You have to start sometime so why not as early as possible. Its not going to get any easier to juggle the schedule for several years so don't put your education on hold.

And one other thing, not to pick but its spelled college, not collage. Collage is a group of pictures. College is a place of higher education that is gonna require you spell it correctly.
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Old 08-21-2011, 01:08 AM   #3
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Default Re: Collage?

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And one other thing, not to pick but its spelled college, not collage. Collage is a group of pictures. College is a place of higher education that is gonna require you spell it correctly.
Seriously?????? Not even a little to soften the iness of that comment? Oh that we could be oh so perfect spellers......

21singlemom: Go for it! You CAN do it. Many do. My sister finished her first degree while pregnant and during her second pregnancy was doing her masters work. I am a single mom who went through undergraduate and law school as a single mom. There are others on here that are doing that same thing..... you CAN do it, in fact you CANNOT afford not too. You might go slower than some, and that's okay. Find a community college that does plenty of courses via television and online. So that when baby goes to sleep, you can study and do course work. That's how I did my first two years while my little one was little......

Also, make sure the financial aid office knows that you are a single mom. It changes how they calculate your school budget and financial aid, including what you qualify for the pell grants and other financial aid. You can even get low interest loans to cover child care, transportation, and even living expenses. Yes it means there is more to pay back, but also means you could get through schooling faster.... also the Ford Foundation gives scholarships to single parents trying to get through school. Check it out in your state because it does include living expenses.

Don't give up!!!!! Seriously. It will be a huge regret if you don't pursue your dream.
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Old 08-21-2011, 01:16 AM   #4
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Default Re: Collage?

i moderately agree with LSL...more education is a good thing...a mountain of debt is not...

i think you are on the right track with the community college...however, i'd caution you to choose your degree path wisely...no sense pissing away money on a degree in a field that you can't get a job in...then you just have useless knowledge and lots of debt...

you might not even need a college...if there is a specific field you want to go into, you may want to look into specialty schools...

like any investment, it's not guaranteed...make a smart investment, and it will pay dividends...make an unwise investment, and it will be like throwing money out the window...

good luck...
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Old 08-21-2011, 06:55 AM   #5
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Default Re: Collage?

Yes, I agree atleast go part-time. Which means atleast 6 credits. That way you can get financial aid. It is best for you and your child.
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Old 08-21-2011, 12:26 PM   #6
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Default Re: Collage?

I'm taking 16 credits this fall and I'm only in school 15 hours a week plus homework at home. I also work part time (about 8-10 hrs/week). Carrying a full time load, usually 12 credits, typically affords more grants. My school had a program that actually had a single parent scholarship! Like BD said, don't go to school for something that has no real job field to go with it. Talk to an advisor if you aren't sure, because some career paths require masters to really be "worth" anything. Also, find out about the work hours of the proposed degree field. I didn't really do that, I assumed that it would be normal hours, only to find out I couldn't have been more wrong. I changed my degree path at that point. Uggh. Almost 2 years "wasted".
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Old 08-22-2011, 01:03 AM   #7
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Default Re: Collage?

Hun I know what your going through. I had taken online courses. See if the community college you are wanting to go to has online. This way you still get an education and be at home with your daughter. I did that for the first few month after my son was born. It is alot of hard work trying to balance everything, but as long as you keep focused on the future it will pay off in the end. I am 19. I work full time, go to school full time, taking care of my own house, and raising my son alone. If I can make it work you can make it work as well. Most community colleges have programs for single mothers. Where they pretty much pay you to attend their schools. Just ask and you will find out.
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Old 08-22-2011, 03:46 PM   #8
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Default Re: College?

good luck 21sm! you can do it!!! definitely check with your financial aid office on your options. i agree...it is a lot to take on, but you can do it...you will find a way. starting early is the best strategy...

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Old 08-22-2011, 04:22 PM   #9
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Default Re: College?

Great advice so far! You CAN do it!! And I have to agree with BD a bit here (shocking, I know :P) make sure you pick something that will pay off, not land you stuck in the same spot your in now after you graduate because that is very common nowadays. I suggest the medical feild, you really can't go wrong there. I am an RN and am going back to school this semester to futher my education, and I have a little 17 month old at home with no daddy in sight to help raise him. It IS possible!!!
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Old 08-23-2011, 12:19 AM   #10
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Default Re: College?

i say go for it!. My son is about to turn 2 next month, at 3 months old i started a respiratory therapy program an hour away from my home. My sons father is no where to be found. I went to school and clinicals and worked. My biggest challenge was daycare especially while he was sick. i just had to use financial aid to pay for it and had to find family to watch him while sick. I am graduating in December. You can do it! I know it seems impossible and i feel like im about to crack right now but it will be worth it. Just take it slow i would recommend online classes at first. i did online classes the semester i had him up till i started my program. You can do it! i have no baby daddy anywhere to find! U can do it!
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Old 08-23-2011, 12:59 AM   #11
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Default Re: College?

Aww 21 single mom!!
I have totally been in your shoes!!!!!!!!!

I quit my full time job to start college full time to find out I was not only pregnant my first week of school, but I was also 7 months along. I was just devistated! I had changed my whole world to work around school and suddenly it was all about to change again! I tried to keep up with that first semester, but it was just impossible. (I had alot of probs with the bio father, he is a major tool) I was too distracted and failed/dropped my classes. (that was a fall semester) I tried again in the summer (my daughter was about 6 months old then) and I failed online classes. I tried again the next fall and failed again. It was just too much being a single parent with no help trying to do it all and be super mom. I was just too over whelmed! So- I waited, and now that my daughter is bigger (now 20 months old) its wayyyyyyyyyyy easier to manage course work! She's bigger and can keep busy for a few mins so I can get things done here and there, and I dont feel guilty putting her in day care for a day while I go study at the library for a few hours.

I would recommend trying a semester and seeing if you can manage, if not, colleges are really nice and helpful that if you need to take 1 year off or less or more, they allow you to with out having to reapply and start all over.
PS- do you have a pell grant? Its free government money for you to go to college as long as you dont have a bachelors degree already. If you dont have one, you can apply for it online! They factor in money for things like rent/gas/food. Its super nice!

Keep in school! College is the new High School Diploma! You can do it!!
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Old 08-23-2011, 08:06 AM   #12
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Default Re: College?

Quote:
Originally Posted by OrchidMom View Post
PS- do you have a pell grant? Its free government money for you to go to college as long as you dont have a bachelors degree already. If you dont have one, you can apply for it online! They factor in money for things like rent/gas/food. Its super nice!
free?
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Old 08-23-2011, 01:28 PM   #13
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Default Re: College?

You can still get a Pell Grant if you have a bachelors degree BD. I got one >.
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Old 08-23-2011, 01:53 PM   #14
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Default Re: College?

Don't know if you can or can't. Just questioning the word "free"
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Old 08-23-2011, 03:09 PM   #15
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Default Re: College?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bubba'sDad View Post
Don't know if you can or can't. Just questioning the word "free"
Yes, for any taxpayer that has to pay taxes, actually pay them and not get them back or get EIC, the money is not "free" the money is not even available, the money is being taken from them.

However, be careful how much of an issue we make of this one..... there are a lot of things that people that are "free" from the government..... Depends on if you itemize your taxes or not......

AND, this is one area that I have no problem paying for. I'd rather this than EIC, cash welfare payouts, and the 1000's of others which simply perpetuate the cycle of poverty.
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Old 08-23-2011, 06:32 PM   #16
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Default Re: College?

I'm not against it. I just wish people understood what "free from the government" really meant.
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Old 09-17-2011, 10:16 PM   #17
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dance Re: College?

I was pregnant with my first child at 19 while attending college with a basketball scholarship. I lost my scholarship and was still able to achieve my bachelors degree while raising my child by myself. You can do this but it will not be an easy journey. Just remember that by you going back to school will ultimately give your child something to strive for. Both of my parents have degrees so naturally I always knew that there was no such thing as no college.
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Old 09-18-2011, 03:56 AM   #18
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Default Re: College?

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Originally Posted by LexieBaby View Post
Both of my parents have degrees so naturally I always knew that there was no such thing as no college.
So true. My daughter never says, "if", it's always "when I go to college."
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Old 09-19-2011, 11:07 AM   #19
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Default Re: College?

I agree with everything everyone has said.

You can do this, it's all in a matter of how bad you want it.

When my kids were 4, 2, and 4 weeks old, I went back to school. I knew I had to do something in order to provide for my kids (I was a single parent then too, with no help from family) I went to a school that had a daycare on campus. I took a double course load, finished my 2 year degree in 13 months, I also worked 5 part time jobs (all but 1 allowed my kids to be with me during work) I'm not gonna sugar coat it, it was tough as ____, but I also knew that me graduating and getting a job would enable me to provide better for my kids.
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Old 09-20-2011, 03:47 AM   #20
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Default Re: College?

I'm on my first semester in college with my 1 year old. Its not the easiest ever... and I have more help from my family then some of my married friends. But it doesn't make it less difficult.
My advice is go for it.
I spent a couple of months planning on the major I ended up taking. Try to talk to people that are already in that field.
Just remember that it takes a lot of hard work and sacrifice and that it doesn't pay to go that route unless you are going to follow it to the end.... paying back those loans without a degree is going to be much harder.
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Old 09-20-2011, 06:35 PM   #21
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Default Re: College?

I have 3 kids under 2 and I'm in nursing school full time. I won't lie to you, its hard, and its alot of work. But it will be so worth it in the end. One piece of advice for you is not everyone can do online classes. I tried thinking it would be easier with the kids, but online classes are actually more work than traditional classes. And for me at least it was hard once I was home with the kids to get time to do the online work. Do whatever works for you, a lot of colleges have daycare at do really discounted rates or even f ree for students. But definitely go for it!
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Old 09-27-2011, 11:37 PM   #22
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Default Re: College?

You should definitly try to go to college. I'm in a similar situation. I became pregnant while just starting my 2nd year of college. I dropped out of the school I was in to live with my parents full time so I could have their support. I'm now taking online classes. A school to look into is the University of Phoenix. They have a lot of programs avaliable. Online classes are a bit harder than regular classes, but its easier to be a mom than if I had to be at school all day. Good luck to you. I think you can do it and it will most likely benefit you and your baby more in the long run.
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Old 11-04-2011, 10:13 AM   #23
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Default Re: College?

You are in a tough spot, but lots of people who have multiple commitments have found a great alternative in online degrees. The flexibility distance learning programs (independence.edu/) provide will allow you to work on your own schedule. With no fixed timetables to follow, you can pretty much study at any time that’s convenient for you. You should definitely explore this option. It might just work beautifully for you and solve all your problems.
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Old 11-29-2011, 01:42 AM   #24
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Default Re: College?

i will tell you to go for it. You know you want it and you know you need it for a better life for your family. Let me tell you i started a health care program when my son was 3 months old and it was an hour away from my home. 3 days a week i had class and 2 days a week i did clinicals for 8 hours a day and did 12 hours a day for 3 days a week this semester. The weekend i worked at a retail store and during breaks i tried to get extra hours if i could. i mean how else would i pay for gas, daycare, and everything a child needs. You can also get financial aid which helped me alot towards daycare. all this without my childs father anywhere in sight. He never looked up. I understand how it is to miss time with your child. I have missed alot of my son's 1st two years and it sometimes makes me sad but it is worth it and i made sure i did not miss any important event like holidays and bdays. I graduate in 9 days and i am beyond thrilled and i cannot wait to have my son with me. You can do it and if you decide to do daycare do not be afraid to let them stay there till the daycare closes. it was fine at 1st to grab him as soon as i can but as he got older it was harder to study so i let him stay there for 2-3 hours after class while i studied and its what your paying for anyway. daycare is expensive but there are programs that can help. it was very hard do not get me wrong but it was necessary
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Old 12-08-2011, 03:46 PM   #25
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Default Re: College?

I was honestly trying to figure out the same thing. Im still early but ive only got amybe 3 semesters till I finish my degree and I just dont know if I should finish or just work. I encourage you to try and take your prerequistes now and when things calm down maybe try and take on a heavier load
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Old 12-13-2011, 01:32 PM   #26
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Default Re: College?

I'm pretty sure everyone has already made very valid points, but I just have to put my thoughts in here...

I am currently in school.
It has been very rough. Being in school the semester that my son was born was WAY too hard for me. I was barely getting any sleep and there were other emotional things that happened during that semester. I couldn't handle at that point. But, I waited a semester and went to college and I am taking online classes. The online classes are so much better for me at this point than trying to go to class on campus.

Only you know what you can handle at this point.
I encourage you to attend college and graduate with a degree that you will not only love but will also provide a career for you.
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Old 12-22-2011, 06:27 PM   #27
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Wink Re: College?

congrats! you are about to enter a chapter of your life that is (yes, a little scary) but so exciting and fulfilling! i understand your desire to continue your education! it will be hard at times but as a 22 year old with a child - i know how important it is to provide for your family. don't get discouraged! others have suggested that you do online college & i believe that is good advice...good luck and remember, you aren't alone!
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Old 12-22-2011, 07:15 PM   #28
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Default Re: College?

I know exactly what you are feeling. I was a stay at home mom during the week and worked full time on weekends for seven years just waiting for my youngest to start kindergarten which would have been august. I did all the preperation and a day before her graduation my husband left. Not only did he take my security but most of all he took that dream that I was looking forward to for so very long. I'm now here having to figure out bills, childcare, everything on my own with almost no help from anyone. The only money I had when he left and took the family funds was used to get an attorney to do what was to have been an uncontested divorce he requested and previously agreed to but then backed out. I cry everyday from the stress of it all but I have my babies,my health, optimism most days and most of all a God that is loving, kind and sees all and can do all. One day I will reach that dream and the reward will be sweater than even I could imagine. So keep ypur head up and keep your dream alive because we can and will do it.
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Old 12-23-2011, 02:11 PM   #29
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dance @21singlemom I was just like you!

Hey 21Singlemom!

You are in somewhat of the same situtation that I was in when I got pregnant. I was 20 and a 1st semester sophmore in college. I had so many of my family members tell me that I needed to take 3 to 4 years off from school to focus on my son but I was never completely convinced!

By the time my son was born, it was time for the fall semester of my junior year to start and because he had a few medical emergencies I decided to take online classes from home and then the following semester MOVED back to my college with (which was 4 hours away from my hometown) with my son who was 6 months old, to finish my degree.

I graduated my my B.S in 4 1/2 years (2009)! It wasnt easy but it wasnt impossible either! I did my homework prior to moving back and researched daycare, housing assistance, childcare assistance and food stamp benefits so by the time i went back, I had mostly everything lined up. And I also had great friends who would watch him for me in the evenings if I happened to have a late lab class.

Life in college was completely different this time around though because I had a responsibilty to graduate and take care of my son so trips to the bar and all the parties STOPPED. Dont get me wrong though, I went out every now and then because single mother or not, we deserved to have some fun every now and then!

@21singlemom, I know this sounds cliche but IF I CAN DO IT, YOU CAN TOO! Just get your goal in sight and dont take your eye off of it!


YOU CAN DO IT!!
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Old 12-27-2011, 01:29 PM   #30
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Default Re: College?

I took online courses to get a degree in pharmacology. It took me twice as long to finish as most people, but I was able to finish and found a really fun job fairly quickly. I am looking into going back to get a different degree because I was laid off and do not want to actually work in a pharmacy but I would love to do ultrasounds and imaging so I am looking into that.

If you really are determined to further your education, you can. Its a hard road, but will reward you in the end.
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Old 12-27-2011, 05:06 PM   #31
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Default Re: College?

I just wanted to share that an ex coworker of mine went for her master's in administration in Arizona. She was smack dab in the middle of her program when she got pregnant. She JUST graduated with her Master's 2 weeks ago and did it while being a mom 100% of the time (her family lives in Minnesota and dad is nowhere to be found). If she can do it, you can too!! = D
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Old 12-28-2011, 10:01 AM   #32
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Default Re: College?

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Originally Posted by 21singlemom View Post
Ok, so I am now 32 weeks pregnant, before I found out I was going to be a mom I was planning on attending community collage to get a 2 year degree. Now I'm not sure if I should still try to go after that dream. Im worried that it will all be to much trying to care for a baby, work and go to school. I'm caught between really wanting to continue my education and spending as much of my time as i can working and taking care/bonding with my little girl. I don't want to start something i can't finish. All of this makes me so ticked at my ex for leaving me in this situation, he is to busy getting high to help me with money or babysitting ( not that i would trust him to take care of her anyway). So I'm forced to try to figure all this out on my own as far as what will be best for me and my baby's future. Will someone thats been in a similar situation give me some advice?
I'm just curious about what you decided to do? are you going for it?
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Old 12-28-2011, 04:26 PM   #33
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Default Re: Collage?

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i moderately agree with LSL...more education is a good thing...a mountain of debt is not...

i think you are on the right track with the community college...however, i'd caution you to choose your degree path wisely...no sense pissing away money on a degree in a field that you can't get a job in...then you just have useless knowledge and lots of debt...

you might not even need a college...if there is a specific field you want to go into, you may want to look into specialty schools...

like any investment, it's not guaranteed...make a smart investment, and it will pay dividends...make an unwise investment, and it will be like throwing money out the window...

good luck...
AGREED! Be careful what you choose to go to college for. I wasted 10k
Don't believe the sites (most in demand professions) Ugh those advertisements piss me off. They tell you various medical fields, but you don't realize the area you are in has 100 grads for 3 jobs.. I will tell you what to not waste your money on. Curious what you are wanting to go back to school for.

So you can do it! Lots of single moms,dads have done it before you. Just take a little time for you and the baby after the baby is born, and then start slow.
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Old 01-05-2012, 04:54 PM   #34
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Default Re: Collage?

momma rose with some of the best advice yet - DO be careful where you decide to attend and what you decide to major in. College is supposed to be an investment in yourself, your future, your kids future, etc. but, there are many majors and certifications out there that don't get you much farther than a high school diploma or GED. Do some research - choose something you are interested in but, most importantly something that will reward you in the future.

I would look at job boards, good which jobs make a salary you need to survive, etc. and then gear your decision based on whats available and what will allow you to live comfortably!

Again, good luck!!
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Old 01-24-2012, 12:58 AM   #35
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Default Re: College?

hope you decided to attend college
i enrolled into Westwood College while pregnant with my daughter and am now on my way to a BA......my daycare is paid by the gov't (there are a few rules but they provide full-time daycare) so thank god for that
and go to www.fafsa.gov and apply for a way to pay for school - anything helps
and good luck
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Old 02-22-2012, 06:02 PM   #36
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Default Re: Collage?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bubba'sDad View Post
i moderately agree with LSL...more education is a good thing...a mountain of debt is not...

i think you are on the right track with the community college...however, i'd caution you to choose your degree path wisely...no sense pissing away money on a degree in a field that you can't get a job in...then you just have useless knowledge and lots of debt...

you might not even need a college...if there is a specific field you want to go into, you may want to look into specialty schools...

like any investment, it's not guaranteed...make a smart investment, and it will pay dividends...make an unwise investment, and it will be like throwing money out the window...

good luck...
I totally agree here, good advice here.
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