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Old 11-09-2008, 04:04 PM   #1
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ok single parent no family around. I work 50hrs a week. My company will pay my tuition to finish my degree. I still have 2.5 years to go at least. Can I pull off work, college and solely and I mean solely parenting my 3 and 5 year old? Will they be ok or should I wait? Any opinions
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Old 11-09-2008, 04:36 PM   #2
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This is a tough one. Can you take one class at a time? I know that would make it take a long time but might be more doable. Or at least start with one class and see how it goes.

Do you have any help at all? A friend or neighbor who would take them to the park or Chuck E Cheese while you study?
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Old 11-09-2008, 07:40 PM   #3
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I worked 40 hours, took classes online, and parented as a single parent to my daughter. I will not lie, it is one of the hardest things I have ever done. I think that if you can take all your classes online, then yes, it can be possible. However, if you have to actually spend "class time" in a class physically, I don't think it would be possible. Especially work that many hours. When I switched to a university, I had to cut my hours to 35 hours a week.
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Old 11-09-2008, 08:21 PM   #4
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My boss is amazing and really is supportive. He is talking to the powers that be about me going to some classes on work time and just letting me come in earlier. The rest Im shooting for online. I do not make enough to take care of these kids the way I really want to and finishing school would certainly help and I have wanted to go back forever. I just turned 32 and I figure now or never. I think I am going to try, whats the worst that can happen right??????????
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Old 11-09-2008, 09:21 PM   #5
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If you really want it, you can make it happen. Something that has been a huge help is arranging playdates for my son, his buddy comes over and they keep each other occupied while I can get some studying done, and then he goes on playdates to his buddies house and I have time to be at the library if need be.

Also, I have found that it can be really frustrating and inefficient to try studying when my son wants attention. When it's just the two of us at home he gets my undivided attention as much as possible. No use doing everything half-arsed... We cook together and clean together; I really focus on making the most of every minute with him, it makes me feel a little less guilty when I have to spend time so much time away from him. But that's just has worked for me, you will find your own groove.
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Old 11-10-2008, 12:21 AM   #6
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Sara I think you can do it but you will be adding ALOT of extra stress. idig has a great suggestion. do 1 or 2 classes just to adjust then you can figure out from there how it goes. The biggest thing I see that most college students need is to manage their time, Being ft worker ft mommy with no support makes this extremely hard but if you want it it is yours. by past posts you know how to relax when you have a chance which is good, since you like to read you will just read your assignments
p.s. if you have a coarse that you have to attend at least you will meet some people. but remember study don't let any romance get in the way unless its the right guy. but you pledged 10 years haha
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Old 11-10-2008, 05:25 AM   #7
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I agree with everyone else. You can do it if you really want to. I am not sure that you would really want to do it in 2 and a half years though. Plan your time in years. Set realistic goals for yourself. Make sure you carve out some time for those Mommy kid moments you do not want to miss. Maybe set you goal to 3 and half to 4 years.
I am big on planning ahead of time. I usally have all my vacation planned out for the entire year by Feb. I guess that is not too crazy on here because half of us have mediation agreement s that state when we have our kids for vacation. My son is only three but, I am already checking out when the next basketball season is for the 3 and 4 year old league. The always have practice and games on Fridays for 6 weeks. I will make sure that I do not commit to anything on Friday nights anytime time during that period. That doesn't happen until next year though. I also want to check to see when his pre-k feild trips start so I can go to one or two of those. I really try to make sure I throw in something fun each week. I guess in your case what you can do is analyze each semester. Most important things first Work- it pays the bills, kids fun time- thats really why work so hard in the first place, school- so we can afford more fun time.
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Old 11-10-2008, 05:58 AM   #8
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Sara1,

It is possible. (I wouldn't recomend it thought) When I was separated I needed to complete a year to get the degree I wanted. My children where about the same age as yours. I spaced the instruction time on two days, which left the parent time on the other three days during the week.

I did not have a job though, I think the routine and distraction of a job would have kept my mind busy on productive things. I, instead had to rely on my student loan for cash during the entire time. I was also not legally separated nor could afford it so there was no "help" from the children's father.

I have no idea how I made it sometimes though I did pray about it alot!

Remember, young children who miss you will want to stay up with you thus... makes studying difficult unless you can get them to study too Keep a routine of "play" time together and "study" time together. Maybe a basket of books and paper with pencils will keep them occupied while you study.

Good luck
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Old 11-10-2008, 09:33 AM   #9
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I think, that whatever you think you can do, if you just put your mind to it, then you can do it.

You sound like a strong person whose quite capable so go for it.
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Old 11-10-2008, 06:02 PM   #10
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Thank you everyone for the suggestions. My kids I wish I was half the planner you are and Fred don't worry about the college hook-ups. Don't think that'll be happening unless someone is fullfilling some Mrs Robinson fantasy.....hmmmm. Just kidding! Thanks I really appreciate the thoughts
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Old 11-17-2008, 08:30 PM   #11
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Quote:
Fred don't worry about the college hook-ups. Don't think that'll be happening unless someone is fullfilling some Mrs Robinson fantasy.....hmmmm. Just kidding


watch out for those college boys libidos
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Old 03-15-2009, 12:03 PM   #12
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If you can swing it, more power to you!! Like some one else suggested, maybe try one or two classes to start with. And also check at the college you'll be going to, see if there are any single parent support groups. I know some colleges have them, and at the very least offer ears to sympathize and someone to call up if you need some help to get in some study time.

I'm a single parent of 3 - one is special needs. I work 20+ hrs a week and go to school full time. TBH though, I don't think there's anyway I could have done this without my mom. In my case though it's mainly because of my youngest and her needs.
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Old 04-11-2010, 08:23 AM   #13
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Default Re: Am I crazy or can I do this?

hey sara, i have a 6 and 3 year old.....i agree with LSL...its not going to be easy, you'll have to cut back on working or working hours to go for this........
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Old 05-21-2010, 02:05 AM   #14
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Default Re: Am I crazy or can I do this?

It was a struggle for me to attend college full-time and work full-time before I became a single mother. I'm sure it would be hard to do all three but in the end I have no doubt that it would all be worth it... anyways, if you change your mind later you can always leave school, there is no harm in trying.
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