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Old 09-21-2010, 11:31 AM   #1
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Default puberty and sweating in weird places

Ok, I would definitely win the embarrassing mom of the year if M found out about this post

I looked this up and apparently it has a slang name, though I never knew such a thing existed. Swamp ___, it's called.

M had a traumatic experience getting out of his plastic chair at school and having soaked through his shorts with ____ sweat.

Ok, so he has been wearing gym shorts under his jeans to absorb it, but he is really paranoid getting up out of his chair now. So I googled because that is what I do.

Who knew?



So ordering some of this, don't think I have ever seen it in a store. Though I am not easily embarrassed I just cannot fathom asking the pharmacist if they carry Anti Monkey ____ and where I might find it. Then again, it might be fun

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Old 09-21-2010, 11:44 AM   #2
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Actually "Anti Monkey ____" works GREAT in those horrible sneakers. Would work great on his derrierre but that's only if he gets the humor and doesn't become offended on general principle. The powder may be found at Walgreens, Walmart, Target, ect. Look around, it's bright yellow and has a pretty distinct (and funny) label on it.

Other things that would work: Looser undies (boxers mebbe) and less layers. More layers means more heat,which mean more sweat. Have him also bring a jacket or hoodie that he can casually take off and drape over the plastic chair so as to give some air flow down there, couch up any sweat and prevent "noises".

Good luck.

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Old 09-21-2010, 11:48 AM   #3
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Wow....... That is #2 reason I don't mind being a girl.
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Old 09-21-2010, 12:01 PM   #4
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Glasslass, thanks for the tips. He does wear boxers. I asked him about the layers making it worse but he said at least it absorbs it.

He will probably get a kick out of the anti monkey ____, but would die of humiliation if he knew I posted about it, even on an anonymous board!

Poor guy, puberty sucks!

---------- Post added at 10:01 AM ---------- Previous post was at 10:01 AM ----------

Oh, GL, where might one look for this product? Is it with the deodorants?
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Old 09-21-2010, 12:07 PM   #5
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Varies from store to store, but I'd look first with bath products- wherever the powder is. Deoderant aisle probably would make sense too.

My 13 year old son has the same issue and has had great success with the hoodie trick. He's also taken to showering 2 or 3 times a day, but we are in Florida now and he's used to the New Hampshire climate.
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Old 09-21-2010, 12:13 PM   #6
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

How does he explain a hoodie when it is 98 degrees (which is part of the problem)? I will suggest it to M, I guess he could say he gets cold in the AC?

Thanks for the tips!
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Old 09-21-2010, 12:17 PM   #7
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Ah- Hoodies are cool-factor garments that trancend fashion or common sense, apparently.
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Old 09-21-2010, 12:22 PM   #8
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Oh my heavens thats a new one. humm could explain some interesting attire lately. I think I may just see if I can find some and just leave it in my sons room. hehe
My son also has started taking extra pants to school. He tells me its for after gym.
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Old 09-21-2010, 01:08 PM   #9
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

OMG!!!! :: This is priceless.

I would so NOT have a problem going to our Wall-Mart and asking for Anti-Monkey ____ powder. I might go do it just for fun. The look on the people's faces would be worth the trip! (you have to know where I live, ).

Ah-hem....that said, I feel really bad for poor M. What a drag for the poor guy. You are such a wonderful Mom, Idig!
I don't think E will get swamp ____, he has no ____.......

Time to hear from the guys here! Are you guys hiding behind your computers? Do you all have secret swamp ___? ::
But seriously, is this something that gets outgrown barring times of sweat producing activities?
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Old 09-21-2010, 01:24 PM   #10
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Well, some kids outgrow it, some do not. Poor guy gets it just sitting there. We were headed to the library the other day and he kept contorting himself to look at his rear. Finally I asked, "What are you doing??"

That is when he told me about standing up in class and his friend pionting out to him loudly that his ____ was wet. It happened sitting at a football game too. So it isn't just physical activity for him right now, poor guy only has to sit down.

It is apparently quite uncomfortable too.

Also, guys are not the only ____ sweaters. There is an anti-Moneky ____ just for women too.
http://i411.photobucket.com/albums/p...antimonkey.jpg

---------- Post added at 11:24 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:22 AM ----------

I also came across this while searching for buttantiperspirants.

Not sure what it does about the sound, but Blue this might resolve your needing to remain single

http://i959.photobucket.com/albums/a.../SBsplash2.jpg
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Last edited by MotherBoard; 10-06-2010 at 08:16 PM. Reason: removed posted pic at idig request since they are really big
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Old 09-21-2010, 01:50 PM   #11
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

OK, I'll jump in here. In my younger days I was stationed in hot tropic areas and countries. I just plain sweated the 1st month or tow. Off duty we all just wore shorts and t-shirts. Most of us went "regimental" (or no underwear). It was average 90* with what seemed to be 200% humidity. During the monsoons we were soaked all the time. Rain gear did not help at all.
Yes I had a sweaty ____, but.... my whole body was sweaty. Since I am living in cooler climates I don't have that problem, except during real hot days, over 100*.
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Old 09-21-2010, 02:13 PM   #12
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

These poor pubescent boys. If they aren't trying to hide something in the front now they have to worry about the rear side too!
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Old 09-21-2010, 02:54 PM   #13
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Quote:
Originally Posted by SueP View Post
These poor pubescent boys. If they aren't trying to hide something in the front now they have to worry about the rear side too!
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Old 09-21-2010, 03:20 PM   #14
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Sue - Yep, you hit my #1 and #2 reasons why I like be a woman just fine thank you! There are more.

I figure one of the only down sides is that men can pee where ever. Every once in awhile I get a little jealous of that, but it does not last long.
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Old 09-21-2010, 03:58 PM   #15
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Didi you not see the Lady Ant- Monkey ____ above? They have one just for us. Supposed to be great for thigh chafe and big tata sweat. I kid you not.
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Old 09-21-2010, 04:10 PM   #16
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Thigh chaffing! I did see it. I thought about it for a moment because I do get that thigh chaffing bit when I go without pantyhose (And I hate them).... might have to look at it.

And actually....I wonder if it would work for A. She doesn't get tata sweat. But under her bra, after dance, she is rubbed raw!!!! She has never danced this many hours before and it looks like all the movement is chaffing her.
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Old 09-21-2010, 04:22 PM   #17
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Good heavens! Miss a few days and look what threads are on here now!! I don't even know what to say about the ____ sweat. Leavin' it at that.
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Old 09-21-2010, 05:43 PM   #18
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

[QUOTE]
Quote:
Originally Posted by idig View Post
Not sure what it does about the sound, but Blue this might resolve your needing to remain single
Oh yeah, cause wearing a fart filter is sooooo much sexier than just lettin one squeek out.

Besides, mine don't stink. Ha-ha.
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Old 09-21-2010, 06:09 PM   #19
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

I have never heard of this monkey ____ stuff.......but up here we like to use words which are more genteel......we call it sweaty ___. I think men are more prone to it cause there isn't as much air flow thru that region as on a lady. I have studied many a female posterior and can vouch that some seem to be more well ventilated. (Although yesterday at walmart I saw something there are no words for.....)
Boxers help, maybe lighter pants too, not heavy denim? Jeans tend to hug a lot more than other clothes.
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Old 09-21-2010, 06:19 PM   #20
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

What about clothes that don't look different when wet?

I can't think of any, really, but there has to be a fabric that looks at least the same color wet or dry. Wouldn't be any more comfortable, but it would be less embareassing...speaking of which....

Watch out for white...it can get transparent when wet!

Actually, so can beige...just ask all the people at Dollywood the week we went, .
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Old 09-21-2010, 06:45 PM   #21
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Ok, got the commitment from M to try the Monkey ____ powder, but I am going to have to order it after all. Apparently it is not something stocked in my neck of the woods. I did find Gold Bond powder but I just cant stand the thought of my 13 year old smelling like Gold Bond. Hopefully Monkey ____ smells better

Oh, and he laughed so hard I think he injured something when I showed it to him on the computer. I think he is relieved to find out it is such a common problem that they make something for it He is going through that awkward, verging on paranoid at times (see OP) stage.

When B goes home I will suggest the hoodie thing too. I'll tell him I read about it on a discussion board, which is true. Just won't mention it's this one....
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Old 09-21-2010, 06:56 PM   #22
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Quote:
Hopefully Monkey ____ smells better



Are you hearing yourself? ::
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Old 09-21-2010, 06:57 PM   #23
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

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Are you hearing yourself? ::
Made you laugh
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Old 09-21-2010, 07:10 PM   #24
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

You sniffing where?
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Old 09-21-2010, 07:26 PM   #25
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

LMAO...I'm loving this post. My friends and I have a phrase coined for this affliction: SWASS (sweatty a$$). We have other terms that we enjoy using for similarly embarassing male afflictions such as BACKNE (pimples on back) and ASSNE (pimples on a$$.) Yes we are horrible females, but we get a period every month so we have the right to make fun of boys!! hehe
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Old 09-21-2010, 07:43 PM   #26
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

See, my friend Marty has called it SWASS and swamp ___, and ___ sweat---but I guess I just did not know what the issue was, now I do!!! LOL.
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Old 09-21-2010, 07:56 PM   #27
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Any powder will work. Anti monkey ____, gold bond, baby powder, really any will do the job.

use a little after showering, as for scents get him something like Axe or someother body spray.

But he may need to bath everyday now.

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Old 09-21-2010, 08:04 PM   #28
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Oh, believe me he bathes everyday. It is necessary!

Axe is an invention of the devil and my nose hair still has not recovered from the axe phase a couple of years ago. The only thing Axe is good for is sweaty hockey bags (because they are the only things that smell worse than Axe, IMO )

It does look like Anti Monkey ____ is powder and calamine. Haven't asked him if his bottom is chaffed, figured it must be!!
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Old 09-21-2010, 11:23 PM   #29
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Sometimes these threads give a little too much info! LOL.
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Old 09-21-2010, 11:26 PM   #30
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

What's the matter muskie? You don't want to know that my thighs chaff? LOL.
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Old 09-21-2010, 11:28 PM   #31
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

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Ok, got the commitment from M to try the Monkey ____ powder, but I am going to have to order it after all. Apparently it is not something stocked in my neck of the woods. I did find Gold Bond powder but I just cant stand the thought of my 13 year old smelling like Gold Bond. Hopefully Monkey ____ smells better

Oh, and he laughed so hard I think he injured something when I showed it to him on the computer. I think he is relieved to find out it is such a common problem that they make something for it He is going through that awkward, verging on paranoid at times (see OP) stage.

When B goes home I will suggest the hoodie thing too. I'll tell him I read about it on a discussion board, which is true. Just won't mention it's this one....
The commitment...or is he committing you? I'm thinking somebody should if you're hopingn Monkey ____ smells better than Gold Bond. I'm kind of thinking duct tape on this one, too. May solve all of it without the monkey ____, but it could possibly cause assne issues.
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Old 09-21-2010, 11:41 PM   #32
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

I'm just laughing at it all LSL. Monkey ____ is a new term to me. Some days in the summer in the humidity I just literally peel the clothes off at the end of the work day. The ____ crack can get sweaty and raw (all the salts in sweat irritate the skin???). Shower seems to fix it though.
Not sure it is monkey ____, maybe ape's ___? Chimp cheeks? Somehow I just didn't equate monkey ____ with your thighs......ooops, a digression LOL.
I heard microfibre underwear will help.
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Old 09-22-2010, 07:43 AM   #33
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

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I'm just laughing at it all LSL. Monkey ____ is a new term to me. Some days in the summer in the humidity I just literally peel the clothes off at the end of the work day. The ____ crack can get sweaty and raw (all the salts in sweat irritate the skin???). Shower seems to fix it though.
Not sure it is monkey ____, maybe ape's ___? Chimp cheeks? Somehow I just didn't equate monkey ____ with your thighs......ooops, a digression LOL.
I heard microfibre underwear will help.
CHIMP CHEEKS!!!!!
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Old 09-22-2010, 08:58 AM   #34
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

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Thigh chaffing! I did see it. I thought about it for a moment because I do get that thigh chaffing bit when I go without pantyhose (And I hate them).... might have to look at it.

And actually....I wonder if it would work for A. She doesn't get tata sweat. But under her bra, after dance, she is rubbed raw!!!! She has never danced this many hours before and it looks like all the movement is chaffing her.
Ah, Old Ballet Dancer's remedy:
Get a food porcessor or coffee grinder and grind the following to a fine powder:
Handful of dried rose petals
Handful of dried lavendar blossoms

Mix it with a handful of cornstarch and 1 TBSP of dried Myrrh powder.

Voila- French ladies powder that has been used since the 1700s and is still being used today in fine cosmetic shops. Ballet dancers have been using this for 300 years and it WORKS. Apply with a soft brush or a puff.

Also, if you want to glam it up a little, add some cosmetic grade glitter dust. Halloween is coming so that iridescent stuff will be really easy to find.

(Note: Burts Bees Baby powder is exactly the same stuff minus the glitter, and costs an insane amount of $ ounce per ounce.)
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Old 10-12-2010, 01:31 AM   #35
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Funny! Monkeybutt has been my nickname for P since the day he was born. I found this powder a few years ago, in a motorcycle catalog. I laughedso hard when I first saw it, I ordered it as a gag for P. But then me and some friends took a long weekend trip on our bikes to the river and I ended up having to use the powder. I really liked how it worked, helped with the chaffing anyway.
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Old 10-12-2010, 08:13 PM   #36
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Hello Schroed! How are things??
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Old 10-13-2010, 08:58 AM   #37
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Oh my heavens you guys are funny. LMAO (no pun intended)
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Old 10-13-2010, 11:35 AM   #38
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

So, did you wind up being able to find the powder? (Love the picture on the label. Looks like a Ren and Stimpy thing.)

And, most importantly, has your son been able to solve this embarrasing problem to his satisfaction? I really hope so.

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Old 10-13-2010, 11:38 AM   #39
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

I had to order the powder, couldn't find it around town. CVS thought I was prank calling . He won't use it though, so I am using it to deodorize his Vans.

I wound up buying him some wicking underwear at TJMaxx and he is wearing that everyday under his boxers. (I had to cut them into briefs so they won't be visible under the boxers), but it is working great.

Thanks for asking!
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Old 10-14-2010, 12:42 AM   #40
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Hey Idig! Things are going ok, just kind of been in a funk for a while. Boys are doing good, I got some recent pics I will have to post. How are things with you?
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Old 10-14-2010, 09:13 AM   #41
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Glad you found a workable solution.
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Old 10-14-2010, 02:02 PM   #42
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Hey Schroed, would love to see some new pics! Sorry you've been in a funk, hope it's getting better.

Glasslass, thanks! I am glad we found something too. I know he is too
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Old 10-20-2010, 04:49 PM   #43
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Default Re: puberty and sweating in weird places

Interesting, I´ll pay attention this summer if my boy has something like this, because he is growing up fasater and his sweat sometimes has a strong smelling!!!
but don´t think i could find this powder here in brasil...
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