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Old 03-16-2011, 11:57 PM   #1
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Default My smart, great, and wonderful kid

just busted himself. He is at the dollar movie with three friends and called to ask if two could spend the night. I said no, you know the rule P or B can spend the night when I have to work the next day, but not two people because it gets too loud for me to sleep.

So a couple of minutes later the phone rings again. I expected he would now ask if he could spend the night at one of the other boys house. But I answered faster than he expected, just in time to hear "yeah, we'll sneak out halfway through the night". Little ______ then tries to convince me it was P talking about R's plans for Friday. Uh-huh. Right.
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Old 03-16-2011, 11:59 PM   #2
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

Rotflmao!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 03-17-2011, 12:00 AM   #3
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

I know, right?

---------- Post added at 10:00 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:59 PM ----------

He just came in without saying hello and is practicing his banjo. He knows he is so busted.
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Old 03-17-2011, 12:02 AM   #4
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

time to bring the rain to that little behind...
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Old 03-17-2011, 12:06 AM   #5
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

I am just sitting here quietly waiting. I know him, he is freaking clean out right now. I'll give it a few more minutes.
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Old 03-17-2011, 12:11 AM   #6
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

Quote:
Originally Posted by idig View Post
I am just sitting here quietly waiting. I know him, he is freaking clean out right now. I'll give it a few more minutes.
you can be sadistic...do you know that? now i'm lmao

---------- Post added at 11:11 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:10 PM ----------

though, i think i would let it set for a bit...right now he's got a few excuses at the ready...by tomorrow am, he'll have forgotten his great excuses, he'll stumble and fumble for words...it'll be better
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Old 03-17-2011, 12:20 AM   #7
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

BD, why not record his stumbling and fumbling and put it on You Tube?
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Old 03-17-2011, 12:22 AM   #8
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

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BD, why not record his stumbling and fumbling and put it on You Tube?
great idea...go for it Idig...he can be the next viral sensation
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Old 03-17-2011, 08:50 AM   #9
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

Hahahaha thats too funny!!
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Old 03-17-2011, 10:08 AM   #10
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

Ohhhhhhh my. Yeah, I would record it. I would torture him as much as possible.
I would also REALLY want to know about where do we go when we sneak out? What do we do there?

I'd probably be about to go psychic, too. "I see a change in your relationship with these friends in your future......I see motion detectors and alarms on doors and windows, too...."

I'd see things in my future, too. Words. Words like..you. Free time? Job. Contribute. Disrespectful. Ingrate. Sneaky....and arrogant about it even (yeah, I'll easily bs Mom)...jackass! So and so. And you aspire to be as stupid as your friends seem to be?
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Old 03-17-2011, 10:48 AM   #11
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

We had a very long discussion about the correlation between freedom and responsibility. Between trust and honesty. M is well aware that his freedoms and privileges can cease to exist in an instant.

I'm not going to take it over the top or torture. He is only human and these things will be thought about. I am not arrogant enough to think that he is different from every other kid in the world and won't try some of this stuff from time to time. And being the stepmom of two adult daughters I am well aware that there is no way I can catch it all and some things will happen that will make me shudder when he tells me about them as an adult. He will stretch and grow and learn, and sometimes (hopefully most of the time) I will catch it. He will find the boundaries quite defined and the consequences quite consistent.
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Old 03-17-2011, 11:02 AM   #12
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

This is what I did in a similar situation:

I had actually caught my daughter sneaking back into the house when she was 13...I was beyond livid!!! She was grounded! But again I caught her sneaking out. She lost all privs, again she still snuck out...this was going on for over 2 weeks. This terrified me, because we don't live in one of the safest neighborhoods. (btw, she was sneaking out to see the boy that lived next door. The mother in the home was allowing this, and thought that it was great...I took care of that situation, that's another story)...Anyway, I had tried everything I could think of, even made her sleep in my bed with me against the wall, needless to say a tornado could come through my apartment and never wake me! I found out I could file 'beyond control' charges against her, which I really didn't want to do...I did call a police officer who was a friend of mine come and 'put the fear of god into her', but even that didn't work.

So after my daughter saw me talking to another neighbor, She got defensive and thought I was speaking to the neighbor about her sneaking out (I was returning some mail that was delivered to my apartment by mistake) I sat down with my daughter and told her that I could either make her life a living ____ till she turned 18, or she could get her head out of her a$$ and start doing what was expected. During our conversation I found out that the reason she was sneaking out was because she didn't think I would approve of her 'dating' the boy nextdoor because he was bi-racial. (I have no clue where she got that idea) but anyway...I told her that race had nothing to do with why I did't approve, and the reason I didn't approve was because of the sneaking out, and not talking to me about it. I told her That she was grounded for 2 weeks, school then home and that was it, after the 2 weeks if she doesn't sneak out, and follows the rules, then this boy could come over for pizza and movie night, and we'd go from there. I also informed her that alot of us parents in the neighborhood watch out for each others kids, because it isn't the safest here. I'm not sure what she interpreted that to mean, but still to this day (4 1/2 years later) she has it in her head that I notify the neighbors when i'm not home and they watch her like a hawk...of course that's not anything near the truth, but if that's what she wants to think...I let her....it has made life much easier. In the past year I've had to go out of town for the weekend, and she stays at home. She's never had parties, always home when she's supposed to be, etc, etc, etc...all because she thinks the neighbors are spying on her! lmao!! And to be honest, I think this whole situation and us sitting down and talking about it is what has made her feel she could be more open with me about things.

dang...that was much longer than I intended it to be! (guess i can never keep a long story short!! )
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Old 03-17-2011, 11:16 AM   #13
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

I never keep a long story short, and in fact am quite talented at making a short story long .

We aren't there yet, but he was made to sleep in my room last night. If he wants to behave in an untrustworthy way, he will be treated as if he is not worthy of trust. Pretty simple.

The really funny thing is I said, what do you think would have happened if you did that? What do you think would have happened if the police drove by and saw a group of kids out in the wee hours of the morning? I would have gotten a phone call and life as you know would cease to exist. What if something bad happened? No one would know even where to begin to look for you. He said, "I know there is a curfew and the police would pick me up". Wellllll actually there is a curfew in Bham, but not outside the city limits. But who am I to argue?
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Old 03-17-2011, 11:26 AM   #14
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

I have found that unless it's detrimental, when the kiddos make assumptions that are in my favor...I don't correct them.

With my daughter when I was ranting and raving, I was going on and on about child molesters grabbing her, drunks getting her, drug dealers nabbing her and forcing her to work as a prostitute, etc, etc, etc...Then I was ranting about the dangers to me and the other kiddos because she left the door unlocked when she went out, etc, etc, etc...We kind of laugh about it now...because it only takes 3 normal size steps to get from my door to the neighbors door. But I told her that she could just be standing outside the door and all the bad things could happen to her, and as heavy a sleep I am, I'd never hear anything. I've told her though, that all jokes aside, it only takes a millisecond for a bad decision to turn to the worst decision of your life.
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Old 03-17-2011, 12:28 PM   #15
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

We aren't in a bad area at all. The boys walk in groups down to close by stores (in daylight and with permission). Our neighborhood is full of SAHM and M is really, really good about texting all along the journey to and from letting me know exactly where he is.

He claims that they were joking about R sneaking out to see R's girlfriend. I don't know. He did call me and immediately report the next development in this. I told him we'll discuss it further tonight.
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Old 03-17-2011, 12:48 PM   #16
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

My oldest snuck out one time and boy was he busted

A lady from town told me one night she was driving past my house and about half way between my house and town she saw some one in the ditch. She stopped and saw my oldest with his bike. (We live a mile out of town). It was New Years and he wanted to go to a friend's. I was off that night and home sleeping .
I asked him about it and he came clean. I was not happy over all and explained that I lost trust. Then he started to cry when I went to my Patrol car and got a UA kit. Yup I made him pee in a cup. I explained if I could not trust him to be where he was supposed to be, I could not trust WHAT he was doing there. Plus the kid he went to see has had a few experiments that I knew of. He has never done it again. Now he lets me know where he's going and he very trustworthy.

The look on his face when I handed him that cup..... I knew he had not taken anything, but he knew I was not every going to play around.
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Old 03-17-2011, 12:53 PM   #17
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

My sister used to sneak out in high school. Once I got up in the middle of the night for a glass of water and noticed the back door was unlocked, so I locked it. Little did I know that my sister had intentionally left it unlocked...

She told me later that she had to find her way in the house through the dog door that night....
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Old 03-17-2011, 01:35 PM   #18
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

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Originally Posted by alexmichele07 View Post
My sister used to sneak out in high school. Once I got up in the middle of the night for a glass of water and noticed the back door was unlocked, so I locked it. Little did I know that my sister had intentionally left it unlocked...

She told me later that she had to find her way in the house through the dog door that night....
OMG!!! I did the same thing to my brother!! Problem was, he wasn't a little guy, and had been out drinking with his friend, decided to come in the doggie door and got stuck, then passed out....that's where my dad found him the next morning laying in a puddle of v.... it was gross...my brother never found out it was me that locked the door, and I never admitted it! That kid was grounded the entire summer!
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Old 03-17-2011, 01:43 PM   #19
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

We don't lock our doors here , and our dog is too large for a doggie door. He need the whole thing.
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Old 03-17-2011, 01:59 PM   #20
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Default Re: My smart, great, and wonderful kid

Our doggie door was complicated, which made the whole thing hilarious. It was summer time and at night the dog was in a huge kennel that my dad had built in the garage. The kennel had a gate on the inside and a dog door to the backyard. The dog door was raised off the ground outside because our house was on a slope, and right behind the garage outside was a shed. Between the shed and the garage was a ramp the dog would walk up and down to get into and out of the dog door.

So my sister actually had to crawl up this ramp behind the shed, crawl into the dog door into the kennel where the dog was sleeping, crawl over the dog, and figure out how to unlatch the gate from inside the kennel so she could get out.

Then she had to find the spare key hidden in my dad's toolbox (which was never kept in the right place to begin with ) to let herself into the house.
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