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Old 06-21-2012, 04:09 AM   #1
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Default I know I shouldn't be so worked up

I know, I know, but my daughter is just insane! At least when she was 16 I had some measure of control over how insane she could be, but now Ruby is 19 and just going all out. Piercings and sneaking out all the time weren't enough, she couldn't be content with wacky hair colors, no now she's going to date old men and hang from hooks! Ruby is dating a 51 year old man! Did I mention she is 19?! Recently she was at a family celebration of my father's birthday and was showing off her brand, yes I said brand, of her partner's initial. He did it for her. Last christmas Ruby had photos of herself tied up in rope and hanging from ceilings and bridges. Just showing them to every one. And this is just the stuff she talks about, who knows what she doesn't share with the world. I'm just scared for her safety, and I don't like the influence she has on her brother (who now wants a lip piercing and blue hair). I'm not even sure if I'm after any advice (if any one has it, it's appreciated), I just want to know that Ruby is going to be ok and going to go through this just fine.

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Old 06-21-2012, 09:12 AM   #2
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

This sounds eerily familiar...... We had another women on here with a daughter a bit younger doing the exact same things... That child was also into knives and such and locked her bedroom up. Pretty sure she had a younger brother, too....
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Old 06-21-2012, 09:13 AM   #3
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

Good Lord....I don't even know what I would do either. Hanging from hooks and ropes? I don't even know what to say....other than I don't know if something like that is a phase or what. What else is she like? Is anything major going on (or has gone on) that would cause her to try things like this?? I just have no advice other than I can FEEL your fear in your post and didn't want to think it was being ignored.
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Old 06-21-2012, 09:24 AM   #4
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

Interestingly enough she was also in Canada and also had a brand. Must be a Canadian thing?!
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Old 06-21-2012, 09:43 AM   #5
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

The BDSM thing can actually be considered a "Lifestyle" depending on how in-depth one gets. Many women get into the BDSM scene due to a total lack of self-esteem and confidence.

Now, a couple things to look at here...
1. She is a consenting adult now that she is 19 years old. Unless there is some issue pertaining to her mental faculties that has not been brought out, she's just rebelling.

2. You have a younger son that is starting to be influenced by her new lifestyle.

There are a couple things that you can do, but you would have to be willing to take the "Tough Love" approach with her.

Tell her straight out that you do not approve and if she is going to continue this lifestyle, then you WILL put her out of your home since she can't honor your wishes while she lives under your roof...presumably for free.

Tell her also that she is being a negative influence on her little brother and that even if she does leave, you will have to limit her contact with him because of the bad influence.


Then again, the other thing is perhaps just read 50 shades of gray and accept it!
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Old 06-21-2012, 09:49 AM   #6
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

http://www.techweez.com/2011/12/01/a...y-hack-plugin/
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Old 06-21-2012, 09:49 AM   #7
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

See RM. There is merit to my no Canadian but Muskie rule....LOL
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Old 06-21-2012, 09:59 AM   #8
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

LOL! Yes there is... well there are a select few in addition to Muskie that are okay in my book...
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Old 06-21-2012, 10:16 AM   #9
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

Quote:
Originally Posted by Re-Mom View Post
LOL! Yes there is... well there are a select few in addition to Muskie that are okay in my book...
they probably drink bottled water...
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Old 06-21-2012, 11:10 AM   #10
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

I'm sure they do... and Muskie doesn't drink it so there we have it. The secret to sanity in Canuckland!

---------- Post added at 10:10 AM ---------- Previous post was at 10:09 AM ----------

Oh wait...he's not sane. Well, whatever!
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Old 06-21-2012, 12:39 PM   #11
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

Um....... deja vu. Actually there have been a few posts lately that invoke this feeling.
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Old 06-21-2012, 02:20 PM   #12
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

Ya seems to be going aroundLOL
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Old 06-21-2012, 03:34 PM   #13
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Default Re: I know I shouldn't be so worked up

If this is true - Please go to your local police and get that child committed. If you don't you can be sighted as neglecting the care of your child's mental needs.
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