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Old 05-12-2009, 08:50 PM   #1
GypsyEyes
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Default Life with teens

Hello again, I just joined today. I live in Sault Ste. Marie ON, Canada and I am a single mom of 4 teenagers. Ive been raising the on my own for 13 years. My whole life hass been about being the sole provider and parent, I know nothing else. It seems my life is changing once again - its a good thing and a bad thing. The good thing is my kids are well adjusted, I am so thankful for that, they are honestly good hearted kind teens who are productive,thoughtful and involved in the community but more distressing and relieving at the same time is they are more independant of me. They don't need me as much anymore for caregiving, making supper - I have more time to myself & I know I shouldnt be complaining but.....but....I miss them at times. They go to youth night at the local Native Friendship Center here in town where they go Gym Nights,Movie Nights, etc and on the weekend they are in a running club. They are very very close siblings, they still fight once in awhile but surprisingly they go the movies together,walks together, we spend alot of time together when I am not working on the weekends. Ive come home on many many occasions this past year to them sitting around chatting with each other or making suppoer together, my son jamming on his guitar for everyone. Ok I've strayed away from the topic but, the point is..I find myself lonely because every single second of my life was caught up in caregiving, driving them somewhere for something, homework,laundry,cooking, u name it BESIDES working fulltime. Now I have freetime like you wouldn't believe and I am lonely.
I workout every 2nd day at the gym, I go to some spiritual events like pow wow drumming,sharing circles, I do photography but I miss my time with the kids too.

Anyone else go through this?
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Old 05-12-2009, 09:31 PM   #2
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Default Re: Life with teens

My son is just turning 13 so he does not want to spend as much time with me as he use to but I have not felt the full effect yet. Not looking forward to it either. Sorry that I can't be much help..
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Old 05-14-2009, 02:25 AM   #3
Marielle
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Default Re: Life with teens

Hi, and welcome,

Wow! You should be proud as punch that your kids have turned out beautifully!
And that is all thanks to you!!

But, the empty nest syndrome (well, not quite, cos they're still at home...) is the problem.
Yes, I can relate, cos I have 1 son of 17, will be 18 this year, and basically is off doing his thing too.
But that's a good thing!
(I know of 1 single parent with a son of 20 who only hangs out with his mother.....now that is not so great....).

You need to get new things going on in your life. Is there stuff you want to do and can do that you had to put on the back burner while being mum to 4 kids? (hats off to you!).
Cultivate new (and old) friendships.
Community work?
Study - even online, or something that interests you? (Great you do photography, I'm into it too).
Just throwing around some suggestions......

All the best!
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Old 05-14-2009, 11:23 AM   #4
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Default Re: Life with teens

GREAT advice Marielle!!! I know that this will also be something I will face.........since my girl is my entire world right now.
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