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Old 07-21-2009, 07:14 PM   #1
lennieshell
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Thumbs down child parenting class-joke

well i went a parneting class as if that not another way for the system to get money from someone i don't know what is. i send packages,emails,cards,phone calls (unlimited). i let my daugter keep as much contact with her dad as possible and now they tell me that i should not that i should allow her to call him not him call her. and forget the cards that it only reminds the child that the other parent is not here. instead of him calling at night that i should let her make that call to him. the advise is so diffrent from what everyone is telling me to do. at this point i really don't think that anyone knows what to do. i think there are to many hands in the pot and to many cooks in the kitchen. i just wish this was over and done with soon. so that way me and my daughter can move on. just ranting thanks for listening............. anyone one out there have a better time of parenting class than me.
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Old 07-21-2009, 08:24 PM   #2
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Default Re: child parenting class-joke

Wel, I did the parenting class thing...but my issues were very different from the ones you describe. In my class it was all about how to deal with misbehavior, etc. My E stumped them all....
About what you were saying, here is how I felt/dealt with it.
There are many threads about this kind of stuff, and many different opinions. Mine is probably not the most popular but...I will not do Daddy's work for him. I don't interfere, but if he calls, fine. If he doesn't, fine. My son knows I am a constant. Daddy can choose to be a constant or not. He chose not. I do make my son write thank you notes for all gifts recieved, and all calls get returned if missed, but i will not make him call his Dad. If he expresses that he misses him, I will offer and help him make the call...but it is not his responsibility to "make" his Dad think of him, imo. Don't let the classes rattle your cage. You have to do what feels right for your child.
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Old 07-21-2009, 08:30 PM   #3
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Default Re: child parenting class-joke

I agree with Blue. I would not send packages, cards, etc as if they are from the other parent. Sooner or later they will figure out what is going on and the hurt they feel at that time could well be greater than the original hurt of not recieveing that stuff. I also see no problem with the father calling and speaking to his daughter, but I also wouldn't force her to talk to him if she doesn't want to. You can't lay the responsibility of making/or not making those calls at the feet of a child.
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Old 07-21-2009, 08:32 PM   #4
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Default Re: child parenting class-joke

Oh yeah, if he wants to give his Dad something for a holiday or Father's day, etc. I am fully supportive and do whatever it takes to make his effort work...but again...Dad has to nurture the relationship with the boy...I just support everybodies efforts and make sure that I am always there no matter what the others do.
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