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Old 09-30-2014, 11:19 PM   #1
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curse Accused of stealing by my ex!

So, I first have to say that I have mad respect for all of you who have to deal with your ex's on a daily or weekly basis. I don't know how you deal with all that drama and stay sane! My ex lives in Germany, hasn't seen our dd in 3 years, and Skypes with her about once a year, so our run-ins are few and far between. Maybe that's why it irks me so much when it happens? I haven't built up the calluses y'all have!

Anyway, here's what happened. My ex hasn't paid CS in 2.5 years (divorced 4). He finally ordered a CS review, which we're in the process of doing. He says he's unemployed, but his company's website still shows him as their Executive Producer... I just got a notification from CO's CS enforcement agency, forwarding a letter from the equivalent German CS agency. It says my ex "contests the arrears amount (over $10k). He says the arrears amount must be smaller because Mrs. XYZ (barf that they used "Mrs.") has stolen money from a joint bank account. It was a 6-figure amount." OMG!! The nerve...that's a heck of an allegation and, probably one which would warrant, oh, I don't know, maybe a police report, court documentation, something? My ex is completely grasping at straws in order to get out of his CS responsibilities. During our divorce 4 years ago, which was the last time we shared an account, I was 100% upfront about my assets, joint accounts, personal accounts, etc. He never contested anything then, of course, he didn't have anything to complain about - I was honest about everything.

It's very frustrating having this allegation thrown at me and not being in Germany to defend myself. I'm also floored that the German agency would even entertain this ludicrous idea as a reason for lowering the arrears amount. Just goes to show how low a lowlife will stoop to get out of his responsibilities. 46 years old...some people never grow up.
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Old 10-01-2014, 07:19 AM   #2
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Default Re: Accused of stealing by my ex!

It sounds like a stalling tactic to me. But, how can you steal something from a joint account? Both parties have access to it!
Exs throw all kinds of accusations at the other and this sounds to me like an attempt to have payments bogged down in bureaucracy and court challenges.
Hang in there!
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Old 10-01-2014, 01:16 PM   #3
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Default Re: Accused of stealing by my ex!

Yep, I'm with muskie and you. Grasping at straws.

Not that it's true, but:
1) joint account means JOINT access.
also
2) he is just exercising his 'legal' right to stall and be a douche.

I'm really sorry you are going through this.!!! But, you will get through it. Do you have an attorney handling your side?

Good luck!!
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Old 10-01-2014, 04:54 PM   #4
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Default Re: Accused of stealing by my ex!

Thanks to you both! LOL bluewave - exercising his right to be a douche. LOVE IT.

My attorney is sending this response: The dissolution of marriage action settled all financial issues between the parties regarding the allocation of assets and debts. If either party had issue with the other over money allegedly “stolen,” or any other financial issues, the proper time to raise the issue was during the divorce process. Mr. XYZ did not address the issue during the divorce. Mr. XYZ's untimely allegation has no place in the collection of a debt owed for child support. The simple fact is that he owes a substantial sum in arrears for his daughter’s child support and he has refused to pay even one dollar (or Euro) in monthly child support since April 2012."

Thanks again for giving me some perspective!
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Old 10-01-2014, 05:11 PM   #5
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Default Re: Accused of stealing by my ex!

Is that right to act that way enshrined in your constitution? LOL

Glad your att'y is reacting as they have! Sad isn't it how an ex can just out of the blue get under our skin.......again?!
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Old 10-01-2014, 08:00 PM   #6
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Default Re: Accused of stealing by my ex!

Quote:
Originally Posted by muskiedad View Post
Glad your att'y is reacting as they have! Sad isn't it how an ex can just out of the blue get under our skin.......again?!
You are SO right... It irks me to no end to be accused of something I didn't do and when I cannot readily defend myself. But...my rationale side understands that I cannot alow myself to be baited. Not healthy!
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Old 10-01-2014, 08:46 PM   #7
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Default Re: Accused of stealing by my ex!

Great reply. Short to the point non emotional and factual

---------- Post added at 07:46 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:45 PM ----------

I can't wait to see what the reply is.
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