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Old 04-13-2006, 08:43 PM   #1
kimjoneli
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HI,I'M NEW TO THIS BUT THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD WAY TO START A SUPPORT TEAM,I'M SINGLE WITH TWO BOYS,I'M ALSO PREGANT WITH MY THIRD CHILD(12 WEEKS) ANYWAY HERE IS MY PROBLEM:I STARTED A RELATIONSHIP,NOT EVEN TRYING TO,I WAS LONLEY AND IN NEED OF A GOOD FRIEND.I WAS IN THE PROCESS OF CHANGEING DAYCARE FOR MY BOYS AFTER MY SON CAME HOME AND SAID HIS LITTLE BROTHER WAS BEING SPANKED BY THE PROVIDER.IN MY CHURCH THERE ARE MANY CHILD CARE PROVIDERS AND THE ONE I CHOOSE WAS...LET'S CALL HIME BILL. I ASKED BILL IF HE HAD SPACE FOR MY BOYS AND HE SAID YES,I FIGURED A MALE ROLE MODEL WOULD BE GOOD FOR THE BOYS. ALL WAS WELL UNTIL WE STARTED A RELATIONSHIP,WE BOTH WERE SINGLE AND LONLEY,MY BOYS LOVE AND RESPECT HIM SOOO MUCH!...WELL I GOT PREGNANT AND HE HAS STILL BEEN BILL BUT HE HA AVOIDED THIS SITUATION I AM ANGRY AND WHEN I TRY TO TALK ABOUT IT HE JUST AVOIDS IT IN A NICE WAY,ALL A WHILE STILL WATCHING MY CHILDREN AND ACTING AS IF NOTHING HAPPENED AT FIRST HE ASKED IF I WANTED TO BE A FAMILY SINCE WE WERE HAVING A BABY TOGETHER,I SAID YES BECAUSE I DO LOVE HIM.MY QUESTION IS:SHOULD I CONTINUE TO SEND THE CHILDREN TO HIS DAYCARE,ALTHOUGH I'M HURTING AND FELLING ALONE? MY SON SAYS HE DOSE NOT WANT ANOTHER PROVIDER AND I REALLY WANT TO MAKE THE HAPPY,TO ME IT'S ALL ABOUT GOOD QUILTY CARE,WHICH HE GIVES THEM.I CAN'T STAND TO GO THERE EVERYDAY AND DROP MY KIDS OFF AS IF ALL IS WELL,BUT AT THE SAME TIME MY KIDS ARE HAPPY.WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN WHEN THE BABY IS HERE?I DON'T KNOW HOW HE WILL REACT.WHAT ABOUT MY FUTURE? I'M SCARED AND ALONE,PLEASE HELP
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Old 04-13-2006, 08:43 PM   #2
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HI,I'M NEW TO THIS BUT THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD WAY TO START A SUPPORT TEAM,I'M SINGLE WITH TWO BOYS,I'M ALSO PREGANT WITH MY THIRD CHILD(12 WEEKS) ANYWAY HERE IS MY PROBLEM:I STARTED A RELATIONSHIP,NOT EVEN TRYING TO,I WAS LONLEY AND IN NEED OF A GOOD FRIEND.I WAS IN THE PROCESS OF CHANGEING DAYCARE FOR MY BOYS AFTER MY SON CAME HOME AND SAID HIS LITTLE BROTHER WAS BEING SPANKED BY THE PROVIDER.IN MY CHURCH THERE ARE MANY CHILD CARE PROVIDERS AND THE ONE I CHOOSE WAS...LET'S CALL HIME BILL. I ASKED BILL IF HE HAD SPACE FOR MY BOYS AND HE SAID YES,I FIGURED A MALE ROLE MODEL WOULD BE GOOD FOR THE BOYS. ALL WAS WELL UNTIL WE STARTED A RELATIONSHIP,WE BOTH WERE SINGLE AND LONLEY,MY BOYS LOVE AND RESPECT HIM SOOO MUCH!...WELL I GOT PREGNANT AND HE HAS STILL BEEN BILL BUT HE HA AVOIDED THIS SITUATION I AM ANGRY AND WHEN I TRY TO TALK ABOUT IT HE JUST AVOIDS IT IN A NICE WAY,ALL A WHILE STILL WATCHING MY CHILDREN AND ACTING AS IF NOTHING HAPPENED AT FIRST HE ASKED IF I WANTED TO BE A FAMILY SINCE WE WERE HAVING A BABY TOGETHER,I SAID YES BECAUSE I DO LOVE HIM.MY QUESTION IS:SHOULD I CONTINUE TO SEND THE CHILDREN TO HIS DAYCARE,ALTHOUGH I'M HURTING AND FELLING ALONE? MY SON SAYS HE DOSE NOT WANT ANOTHER PROVIDER AND I REALLY WANT TO MAKE THE HAPPY,TO ME IT'S ALL ABOUT GOOD QUILTY CARE,WHICH HE GIVES THEM.I CAN'T STAND TO GO THERE EVERYDAY AND DROP MY KIDS OFF AS IF ALL IS WELL,BUT AT THE SAME TIME MY KIDS ARE HAPPY.WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN WHEN THE BABY IS HERE?I DON'T KNOW HOW HE WILL REACT.WHAT ABOUT MY FUTURE? I'M SCARED AND ALONE,PLEASE HELP
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Old 04-13-2006, 09:30 PM   #3
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Do they know that you are pregnant? When they do know they are sure to find out that Bill is the daddy, how would that all work out? Is Bill not planning to stay in their lives? Would you be sending your unborn child to this same daycare once you start work again after having the baby? Hmmm, if so and Daddy doesn't want any part of it how in the world could he be the baby's daycare provider and not mention being dad? It sounds to me you need some questions answered (they may already have been) and if this is the case I say when the baby is born, take the boys out as you'll be at home for awhile anyway and then put them somewhere else.
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Old 04-13-2006, 09:31 PM   #4
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Old 04-15-2006, 01:09 PM   #5
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thank you for your input,a lot of questions were answered.i'm really glad that i made the decision to join this site...would be nice if i heard other inputs as well sorry for the caps(!) i just figured it would be easy to read,thanks a bunch...happy easter!!!!!!!!!!!!! :thanks: <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by SueP:
[qb] Do they know that you are pregnant? When they do know they are sure to find out that Bill is the daddy, how would that all work out? Is Bill not planning to stay in their lives? Would you be sending your unborn child to this same daycare once you start work again after having the baby? Hmmm, if so and Daddy doesn't want any part of it how in the world could he be the baby's daycare provider and not mention being dad? It sounds to me you need some questions answered (they may already have been) and if this is the case I say when the baby is born, take the boys out as you'll be at home for awhile anyway and then put them somewhere else. [/qb] </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
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Old 04-15-2006, 01:29 PM   #6
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Maybe I should just learn to wear my glasses? Happy Easter to you too!
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Old 07-07-2011, 01:07 PM   #7
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Default Re: in need of advice...good advice

I bumped into this thread because I wasn't paying attention to the date it was originally posted. But, it actually brings up an interesting point.

How did it go? Your child should be about five now. Your other children are five years older. How are you doing now?
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Old 02-05-2015, 07:15 AM   #8
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Default Re: in need of advice...good advice

yeah i agree with your post.
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