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Old 01-20-2004, 03:44 PM   #1
IndependentMother
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Hello everyone! Any advice you can offer is greatly, greatly appreciated:

I am actually married right now, but it's not a good situation. When my husband works (computer database design), he can make loads of money. Sometimes six figures. But lately, within the past three years, he keeps losing the very few contract jobs that come along. I don't know what his problem is, but they always call him after only a few weeks of working for them and tell him not to come back.

Further, because he has always been the breadwinner and I quit my decent-paying job when I was pregnant three years ago, we now have no money, we've lost our house to foreclosure, and our credit, of course, has been destroyed.

In addition, our relationship sucks. Besides all that I've mentioned above, there are other stresses and issues that simply no amount of counseling can cure. I've had it and I want to leave.

Unfortunately, the only job I could find is working at a restaurant as a hostess and I don't make too much money. I need to know what sort of benefits the government offers for assisted housing and daycare. I am confident that I can afford to pay for a low-income apartment and still be able to afford the amenities and food and whatnot, but I cannot, simply cannot, afford to pay for everything plus daycare.

I'm so frustrated because I'm miserable every single day and am constantly thinking about how I can get out of here so I can start over again. I am willing to have joint custody, but I absolutely refuse to give my son up completely. Please help me.

Thank you.
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Old 01-20-2004, 03:44 PM   #2
IndependentMother
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Hello everyone! Any advice you can offer is greatly, greatly appreciated:

I am actually married right now, but it's not a good situation. When my husband works (computer database design), he can make loads of money. Sometimes six figures. But lately, within the past three years, he keeps losing the very few contract jobs that come along. I don't know what his problem is, but they always call him after only a few weeks of working for them and tell him not to come back.

Further, because he has always been the breadwinner and I quit my decent-paying job when I was pregnant three years ago, we now have no money, we've lost our house to foreclosure, and our credit, of course, has been destroyed.

In addition, our relationship sucks. Besides all that I've mentioned above, there are other stresses and issues that simply no amount of counseling can cure. I've had it and I want to leave.

Unfortunately, the only job I could find is working at a restaurant as a hostess and I don't make too much money. I need to know what sort of benefits the government offers for assisted housing and daycare. I am confident that I can afford to pay for a low-income apartment and still be able to afford the amenities and food and whatnot, but I cannot, simply cannot, afford to pay for everything plus daycare.

I'm so frustrated because I'm miserable every single day and am constantly thinking about how I can get out of here so I can start over again. I am willing to have joint custody, but I absolutely refuse to give my son up completely. Please help me.

Thank you.
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Old 01-21-2004, 09:57 PM   #3
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http://www.childwelfare.com/states/colorado.htm

You can contact them and see how they can help you. If they don't provide assitance with child care they will have the info you need to contact a place that does help.

Good luck to you!
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Old 01-25-2004, 08:00 AM   #4
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IndependentMom- I can absolutely relate to what you are going through. I will be moving back to the United States with my 2 sons after having lived in Europe for the Last 13 years.

Solo- I really appreciate the link that you provided because I was gonna come in and ask the very exact same question that IndependentMom has.

As a single parent seeking Relocation/Transition Assistance... I'm wondering if you may be able to give me a pep talk on what kinds of things to expect from agencies that are geared towards helping single parents in desperate situations?
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Old 02-06-2004, 12:08 AM   #5
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Check out the thread above this one from the mom in Illinois. The benefits available vary a little from state to state but I would look into daycare assistance, section 8 housing, food stamps, energy assistance, etc. I'm in Missouri but might be able to help out with any questions.

GOOD LUCK!!!
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Old 02-08-2004, 02:18 PM   #6
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Hello and welcome independent mom! Before you all jump into this I must offer some advice! I am receiving a bunch of assistance right now, daycare and WIC as well as healthy start. It's wonderful to receive all of this free help but everything comes at a price. My cheeks still burn when i have to get out my "coupons" at the grocery store and hold up the line. The people involved in most of these systems treat you horribly, it's rare to be treated like and intelligent human! I don't want to depress you all, i just want you to know the truth, it's not fun. I can't wait to be off all of my programs and get my pride back. I do recommend it though if you can swallow your pride and like paperwork until you get back on your feet. It's worth it to know my son is taken care of everyday! I hope it all works out and please keep us posted!
Jakesmommy
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Old 02-13-2004, 08:29 AM   #7
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Hi JakesMommy... ThankYOU for that InPut. I'd have to say that I wouldn't be EMBARRASED in the Least bit to let it be known that I am use'n Assistance. It is SAD that ONLY in America are people that use Federal and State Assistance Programs made to feel ASHAMEd of it. NoWhere else in the WORLD are people made to feel ASHAMEd.

I have a question though...

SomeOne told ME that instead of Food Stamps that there is some Type of Debit Card given out. Is this TRUE? I guess it is supposed to work like a Bank Card but Only GOOD for Food Purchases and that there is a Monthly Limit On It?

Take Care EveryOne.
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Old 02-13-2004, 10:20 PM   #8
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Yes, it's called an Electronic Benefits Transfer(EBT) card. It looks like a debit card. Your foodstamp funds are deposited into your account every month. It was introduced several years ago so they're probably in use in almost every state by now. On the keypad where you slide your debit card through at the grocery store, there is a button marked EBT. From personal experience, you might want to avoid the automated checkout lanes...the computerized voice loudly announces "You have chosen to pay with foodstamps!"
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Old 02-14-2004, 05:09 PM   #9
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ThankYOU Kiermeg... and that was actually pretty Humorous. I had to LAUGH at the Automated Voice statement. They just won't HELP YOU to AVOID EMBARRASMENT, huh? What's the Point of the EBT Card then? That's a Rhetorical Question. I'm just SIT'n Here Type'n and LAUGH'n my Head Off at that response.

For EveryOne else though... I wouldn't be ASHAMEd if the VOICE got ME in a LONG Line. I'd probably just make a Joke about it and Keep On ROLL'n.

Be GOOD y'ALL and Take Care
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Old 09-27-2014, 01:17 PM   #10
messimo Female
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Default Re: What kind of benefits are available

It depends on what state you live in and what the rules are. Most states makes bread winner pay alimony.
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