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Old 02-18-2008, 09:59 AM   #1
smshybug
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Okay, so yes I realize that everyone has or has had a bit of drama in their lives but . . .

I have this friend who IS drama. Everyday there's something dramatic happening that is just so . . . dramatic! Its like she thrives on drama and I've had it. I can't take it anymore. I'm not returning calls often, not answering them either, not really returning e-mails or sending any, and completely avoiding instant messages.

I just can't do it anymore. I can't deal with the constant whining, complaining and *&^%ing. I dont know how to just not avoid her and not be mean.

Any suggestions?
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Old 02-18-2008, 10:08 AM   #2
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Mean or not, that's why I broke up with a lady last year.

I dont need another child, already have 3!
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Old 02-18-2008, 10:26 AM   #3
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I feel so many times that I'm that friend to people in my life. LOL No matter how hard I try to keep life from kicking my ____ it does and I just plain **** at relationships with men.

I actually cut loose a fair weathered friend because I can't control my bad health, that my parents got divorced, or that my son has certain difficulties. But if I didn't have all sunshine and roses to tell her she would disappear until her kid had a b-day or she was having a baby or she had a problem to vent.

I think I had a point......my point was that we all have some people in our lives that thrive on drama and create it in their lives. we all have some that cannot control the events they experience in life. we all have those that cannot deal unless life is sunshine and roses....and some of us lucky folk have people that can deal with a lot and help us through.

If your relationship with someone becomes more than your stress load can handle you need to address it with her. Be direct and kind but let her know that the constant drama is not something you can handle. You understand and care for her but that you are addressing issues in your life right now and need to cut back on your communication for a while.

Ultimately...you need to decide if her friendship outweighs the drama.
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Old 02-18-2008, 12:49 PM   #4
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Sounds like a good idea for a forum.
Oh wait we got one here ok
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Old 02-18-2008, 02:28 PM   #5
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The more I think about it, the more I dont care if we are friends or not. I have tried to simplify my life and get the negative people out and basically, her drama is negativity. She is never happy, always lonely, nothing is ever good enough, she doesn't have enough of this, she has too much of that . . . blah blah blah.

I just dont think its worth it anymore. I love her to death but I think cutting off communication for a while will be the best thing for me. Yes I am being selfish but sometimes you have to be selfish to be happy.

Now, I have to draft an email to tell her this . . . . I can't do it over the phone cause she will just curse at me.

Any suggestions on how to put this?
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Old 02-18-2008, 06:48 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by smshybug:
The more I think about it, the more I dont care if we are friends or not. I have tried to simplify my life and get the negative people out and basically, her drama is negativity. She is never happy, always lonely, nothing is ever good enough, she doesn't have enough of this, she has too much of that . . . blah blah blah.

I just dont think its worth it anymore. I love her to death but I think cutting off communication for a while will be the best thing for me. Yes I am being selfish but sometimes you have to be selfish to be happy.

Now, I have to draft an email to tell her this . . . . I can't do it over the phone cause she will just curse at me.

Any suggestions on how to put this?
Tell here she's demoted from friend to acquaintance.
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Old 02-18-2008, 07:11 PM   #7
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Tell her that unless she gets a job at Pizza Hut as a delivery driver or the gal on the phone....you doubt you'll be talking to her much in the future.

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Old 02-18-2008, 07:58 PM   #8
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Sarah... this may not be very nice but


Look her straight in the eye seriously and say in your best friend voice,

<span class="ev_code_PURPLE">"I have been really concerned lately over the way you have been reacting to the issues in your life.......</span> <give a

really odd strage iquisative look>

if she still doesn't get it... ask

<span class="ev_code_PURPLE">"are you on drugs?"</span>


OK... think anyone would back off of someone saying that and check their own behaviour
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Old 02-19-2008, 07:54 AM   #9
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Wow, I definitely came to the right place for advice.

Binarian: such a simple response.

Sky: I dont order pizza so . . . I guess I won't be talking to her.

Tessmit: If I asked her if she was on drugs she would say no and ask me if I had any she could take.

I have decided to basically just limit contact. Which will probably **** her off because she called and left a voicemail last night saying she wanted me to come over Friday night to help her with some things around the house and the girls could play together.

First off, her child is an uncontrolled terror and I seriously think my friend needs to take parenting classes. My friend cries when her daughter gets on her nerves and her daughter just keeps on going and pushing more buttons.

Secondly, my friend will basically be moping the whole time we are there and just wants me to come over to help her sort through some bills and such.

Sorry, but not happening. I am drawing the line. I am just not capable of dealing with any more issues from her. I have a life that I'm trying to have. If you guys heard the VM messages she leaves me spazzing out about stuff . . .

Which reminds me, BAMY you think I have road rage, haha, you haven't heard my friend.
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Old 02-20-2008, 07:34 AM   #10
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No her name isn't Amanda but from what I know about her, they could probably create great drama together.

I now remember why I tapered off the friendship in high school. Its funny how things remind you of stuff like that.
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