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Old 10-24-2003, 11:57 PM   #1
Derek513
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I met a white female in nov. of 2001 and we became ******* partners,buddies, whatever. But nothing more. We had many many encounters, most amounting to 2-5 Hours. In Jan. of 2002, she informed me that she was pregnant. At age 18, I was not ready for such a thing. I hinted that she get an abortion, without directly saying or advocating it because I didn't want to hurt her feelings. She made it clear that she was definitly keeping the baby. ******* attractions aside, I really disliked the girl. She was so ditzy, shallow and annoying. I put these feelings aside and begrudgingly accepted my impending resposibilities as a father. My beautiful baby girl was born on September 11, 2002. I loved and cherished her. I spent and spent on her,and always was holding and loving her. After about 2 months, her skin tone began to darken while her hair became more "coarse". The problem lies here: I'm white! I held off saying anything for a week to make sure. Before I had the chance to mention the changes taking place in "my baby girl", her mother told me she didn't think I was the father. She said she had slept with another guy only once during our 3 months of "relations" and that the encounter was brief, amounting to less than two minutes. As I mentioned earlier, we had many "sessions" of two or more hours. She said she never even considered the other guy being the father, due to the total number of sessions and time differential of those sessions. I didn't believe her until I met the guy who didn't believe it was his. He reiterated her words, saying "It can't be mine. I was only with her for a minute." He was in total shock. He hadn't seen her in a year. I really liked the baby, but couldn't stand to be around the mother, who insisted I remain in her daughters life because she and her daughter loved me. I politely declined, and refused to accept money for my purchases I made on baby items, figuring it would hurt her ability to provide for her daughter. It really sucks not seeing her(the duaghter) because I was attached. Isn't this a messed up story? Shouldn't I be happy that I don't have a kid that I never wanted to begin with?
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Old 10-25-2003, 12:07 AM   #2
Derek513
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The "real" father wants no part of her life. He doesnt talk to or see her, and he's in hiding to avoid child support. I'm only 19 and hes is several years older than me. Why isn't he in her life? I was willing to step up to the plate and be a man, raising a kid by a woman I truly resented. I put up with her pregnant rants and raves. So immature, it drives me nuts.
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Old 10-27-2003, 11:52 AM   #3
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With some men it doesn't matter how old they really are they refuse to grow up. I'm facing the same thing with my ex. Honistly, if he's going to act like that then he's not good enough to be her father anyway. She'll understand that one day all by herself.
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"There ain't no talkin to this man. He's been tryin to tell me so. It took awhile to understand the beauty of just letting go."
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Old 02-05-2004, 07:59 PM   #4
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I just want to say that you are a great guy for sticking by YOUR daughters side even if she isn't really yours. It takes someone very caring to do that and I give you props.
If you truly love that little girl, there is no reason to feel used or confused. I'm sure the mother needs your help if the actual father isn't around. I am 18, white and 5 months pregnant with a black guys baby. We don't really get along too well but I hope he will feel the same way toward our child as you do towards yours.
God Bless
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Old 01-19-2005, 07:01 PM   #5
neeah
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Wow not many young men stick around, I have just met a man who I have dated a little over a month who has full custody of as he sees it his daughter. He knows that it is not her skin was always white and then just before her mother left the child with him the test proved what he already knew,this does not change the love he feels for her and I give him a lot of credit for taking on the responsibility as I do you. Being blood does not always make a parent a parent.
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Old 03-05-2005, 07:56 PM   #6
J3pt44
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Go see your daughter
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Old 01-19-2010, 08:00 PM   #7
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Default Re: a messed up story(long)....

She's your daughter by love. Biology doesn't make mom's and dad's
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Old 02-01-2010, 04:24 AM   #8
Marielle
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Default Re: a messed up story(long)....

I'm not surprised she got pregnant by him, even if it was only a nano-second.....

Bet she is beautiful!! Go on, be her dad and stick around in her life.

I myself have a child from an interracial relationship, marriage actually. I am white, european, he is black, african.
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