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Old 11-30-2005, 10:03 AM   #1
lovespurity
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Can anyone tell me how to stay strong and not be down when you are alone through a pregnancy? I went through my first pregnancy alone, but this time it seems alot harder. I have a beautiful 4 year old boy and my second boy on the way, I thought the guy I was with would stand beside me but it all fell apart. I hate going to the doctors by myself, I almost feel like damaged goods. I am young and good looking, but I feel older than I really am, and very tired. I am looking forward to my second child, I just wish I wasn't alone during this joyful time.
Shelly
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Old 11-30-2005, 12:09 PM   #2
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You aren't alone. You have us. I rarely post here but I come here every day for support, advice and laughs. There are some great people on this board. And being single parents, we've shared similar experiences. But to answer your question, look really deep inside, find your self worth and pull that strength from there. Look into you son's eyes and see the unconditional love and admiration he has for you and gather strength from him. You are raising a smart intelligent healthy son. Who says you aren't strong??
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Old 11-30-2005, 12:56 PM   #3
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Shelly, I want to welcome you as well.
On this Forum, you'll find a lot of women who are going through similar situations and together we will be strong. It was a good idea to come here. Dew
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Old 11-30-2005, 01:31 PM   #4
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shelly:
i have been there and done that... he left me right before the holidays and then had the nerve to come back and mess with my mind again after the holidays where over... no explanation just i love you and want to be with you... i made a mistake and took him back and then after my son was born, i realized what a true louse he really was...he did not even take me to the hospital or come to the hospital when his son was born.. my son was three weeks old when i kicked his father out and flew home to pennsylvania to be with my family....he has not seen his son since and he knows where we are and has a way of getting in contact with my son if he really wanted to.. it has been 11 years and i have managed alright on my own since then.. am i lonely... absolutely... i am just getting back into the dating scene and i am having fun...
you have one thing going for you that i did not have and that is this great group of people... they are wonderful to talk to and please do not feel like you are alone..
joyce
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Old 12-01-2005, 08:29 AM   #5
lovespurity
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Thank you. The hollidays so seem like the worst time when you are alone, but I do have my son and he is wonderful. I am glad that I have found some people to talk to. I feel that I am growing stronger day by day, and very soon me and my son are going to go to ohio to stay with my sister and her husband and son. We are very close and I draw stregth from her as well as my son. James, her son, and Jesse, my son, are only a year apart in age and I think It will really be wonderful For Jess to have his cosin to play with while he is awaiting the arival of his baby brother. I am grateful to God to say Jesse is looking forward to having a Baby brother. I am just scared of raising two children by myself. When I was a little girl I can't remember saying, oh I want to be a single mother with two children when I grow up!! I always had fantasies of the house with the white picket fence and the dog and cat and the sweet loving husband who would be there to love and protect me and our children. The father of my second child is a decent man, in some respects, but he is selfish and unthoughtful of me. He wouldn't know emotional support if it bit him in the ____. I am not a cryer by nature, but i think i have cryed more in the last 6 months than I have in my entire life. But I feel better now that I have found you guys, I don't feel so alone. Thank you
Shelly
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Old 12-01-2005, 11:47 AM   #6
Linney B
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Hi Shelly, My name is Linney and I reside in Ohio. Giiiiiirrrrrl! Let me tell you something! you have to hold on to your faith because there are going to be times in your life when that's all you will have! I want to encourage you, If God blessed you to conceive, he'll bless you to survive! The hard times are the foundation that allow you to appreciate the good times and the saying is true... what doesn't kill you will make you stronger! I'm a single parent of three and I've never been married. My kids are ages 18, 16, and 14. They are also my reason for living and loving the way I do. Despite the relationships I've had, they were and are always the one most important part of my life. Keep livin' you'll be fine! Linda
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Old 12-31-2005, 03:58 PM   #7
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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by lovespurity:
[qb] Can anyone tell me how to stay strong and not be down when you are alone through a pregnancy? I went through my first pregnancy alone, but this time it seems alot harder. I have a beautiful 4 year old boy and my second boy on the way, I thought the guy I was with would stand beside me but it all fell apart. I hate going to the doctors by myself, I almost feel like damaged goods. I am young and good looking, but I feel older than I really am, and very tired. I am looking forward to my second child, I just wish I wasn't alone during this joyful time.
Shelly [/qb] </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
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Old 12-31-2005, 04:04 PM   #8
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Hi, I am new here and just read your story. Just wanted to show some support. I am also pregnant with my first child and alone. Not always easy to remain sane but I do remain hopeful. Yes the holidays aren't easy...look at me I am writing on this board (there will not be any big celebrating tonight!).But I am grateful to have found this site to vent, to share, and to draw strength from. Hope you feel better...Take care.
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Old 12-31-2005, 04:17 PM   #9
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I just posted my story today. I wish I knew how to tell you to be strong. I could use the same advice. I am hoping that hearing similar stories will help me believe that I am not so alone.
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Old 01-12-2006, 07:58 PM   #10
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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by davefanatic:
[qb] I just posted my story today. I wish I knew how to tell you to be strong. I could use the same advice. I am hoping that hearing similar stories will help me believe that I am not so alone. [/qb] </div></BLOCKQUOTE>I was in your shoes eight years ago, found my self pregnant by a married man. Who gave me many empty promises, I spend my whole pregnancy depressed and alone. Because of course he was not there for me or would come around when he wanted to. All I can say is hang in there and take care of your self and unborn baby. When my son was 7 months I met the man. I am with today and he has been a father to my son and my son is almost 9.If I was the same person back then that I am today. I would of never even got involved with him, I was 19 and he was 38. It might not seem like it now but things will get better. I spent many night crying myself to sleep.
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Old 02-20-2006, 08:41 AM   #11
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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by lil mama2004:
[qb] You aren't alone. You have us. I rarely post here but I come here every day for support, advice and laughs. There are some great people on this board. And being single parents, we've shared similar experiences. But to answer your question, look really deep inside, find your self worth and pull that strength from there. Look into you son's eyes and see the unconditional love and admiration he has for you and gather strength from him. You are raising a smart intelligent healthy son. Who says you aren't strong??
[/qb] </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
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Old 02-20-2006, 08:45 AM   #12
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HI.. sorry you feel alone....you are not .. there are so many of us with similar storied weather its our first pregnancy or not , weather we have kids or not, we all thought our babies fathers were going to be involved and go the distance good or bad and when they left because they were cowards and weak we must all pull together and for the sake of our babies be strong since that is the only choice we have.. wed rather take swim than sink and you got to see the light at the end of the tunnel.. trust me i know all too well the times i fall apart in the night feeling scared and alone and ashamed that i took this on and how could i not see the signs ... but in the end when you hold your baby and keep rolling with the punches you will look back and see how this experience will have made you stronger.. i know it sounds silly but make lemonade out of lemons...just keep coming to this site for support and meditate, pray , talk to your close friends if you can , family if theyre supportive and stick to your guns whatever your beliefs are after all the advice im sure you will be getting.. only u know whats best for you and your baby in the end.. take care.. LISA
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