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Old 08-24-2004, 08:35 PM   #1
i feel retarted
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Here's the scoop:
I'm 19, 3months pregnant and extreamly freaking out. I live at home w/my parents, not going to college,was babysitting for work until the wife had another child. So currently out of work. My partner at time of conception said he would support my on any decision i made, including having him around or not.(which i really didn't have much of a choice due to the fact that hes an international truck driver.)My parents are really great about helping us and all but when i get down and out i really get down. I think all sorts of horriable things, wish accidents would happen, hope for miscarage,hate leaving home because i see all these happy people,young couples,people w/all these things that will take my lifetime for me to achieve. I can't even look at guys the same anymore. It used to be "wow he's really hot!" now its "wow he looks like a major jerk" or "he looks really sweet,wonder if he is?" My whole perspective of life, love, and everything else has changed. I sincerly feel retarted. Is there anyone who feels the same? Are these JUST pregnant mood swings? Thanks for listing!
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Old 08-24-2004, 08:35 PM   #2
i feel retarted
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Here's the scoop:
I'm 19, 3months pregnant and extreamly freaking out. I live at home w/my parents, not going to college,was babysitting for work until the wife had another child. So currently out of work. My partner at time of conception said he would support my on any decision i made, including having him around or not.(which i really didn't have much of a choice due to the fact that hes an international truck driver.)My parents are really great about helping us and all but when i get down and out i really get down. I think all sorts of horriable things, wish accidents would happen, hope for miscarage,hate leaving home because i see all these happy people,young couples,people w/all these things that will take my lifetime for me to achieve. I can't even look at guys the same anymore. It used to be "wow he's really hot!" now its "wow he looks like a major jerk" or "he looks really sweet,wonder if he is?" My whole perspective of life, love, and everything else has changed. I sincerly feel retarted. Is there anyone who feels the same? Are these JUST pregnant mood swings? Thanks for listing!
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Old 08-24-2004, 11:02 PM   #3
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Well first of all that is normal for the most part. However, just dont ever act on anything because I promise you will regret it later on you know? When we are pregnant our hormones play weird games with our moods and feelings and thoughts. Just wait it out and make sure you find someone anyone to confide in. I know how you feel it is tough seeing happy couples and seeing children with their fathers knowing your child will not have that. Just take one day at a time. if you need someone to talk to or whatever give me a shout mikeysmomma*eeism.*** I'll lend you an ear. Best of luck
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Old 09-02-2004, 08:01 AM   #4
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I remember when I was pregnant with DS I thought the same thoughts that you are thinking. Like Melis said, just don't act on them. Part of your feelings is related to your hormones during your pregnancy, however some are just because you are human. When we feel wronged, as humans many of us tend to want to lash out at the world, most particuarly, ourselves. It's not easy, and I am not going to tell you it is....but I can promise you it will get better. It may take a long time for you to get over some aspects of being a single mom(heaven knows I still have my issues) but eventually they will all come to pass.

Yeah, it stinks seeing your peers out having a good time, and coupling it up(I'm 21, I know!)....but I can guarantee, 10yrs from now, you will be the more mature out of your peers thanks to what you have gone through. I do believe that things happen to us all for a reason, to teach us. I try to put a positive spin on things as much as I can. If you ever need to talk feel free to private message me.

And I know you probably have heard it before...but when you see your baby, all of the bad thoughts, feelings, and anything else will cease to exist....and that is the truth. All I have to do is look at my little guy and the world is perfect.
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Old 09-04-2004, 03:51 AM   #5
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I know were your coming from girl! My guess is that about 80% of this is hormonal. For the frist three months of my pregnancy I was not a whole lot of fun to be around, my daughters father was a drug addict and I just felt like I really didn't have that much to look forward to. Today, my daughter is four and she is the sun that I revolve around. There are always going to be times in your life when you think what if? The one thing that you have that all those single people don't is the fact that you accomplished your goals while raising a child. Be proud of who you are and what you are accomplishing! As a 25 year old with a 4 year old my advice to you is get an education while you can. The only thing I wish I could change the past four years is going to college. I felt like I had no choice but to take on a full time job. Explore all your options and work on your education first! Hopefully I will be starting in January (part time) and it will be a slow, hard process but when I'm done I will have something to be so proud of and maybe my daughter will be a little proud of me too.
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Old 09-19-2004, 03:19 PM   #6
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You're not retarted, you're normal. I'm a man . WE're retarted:-) But be sure of one thing, when your baby comes, no matter if you're a man or a woman, there will be special moments when you'll look back and say " how could I have not wanted this" There will be dark times ahead but when that baby's eyes lights up your world, it'll all be worth while. Be strong and patient. To help regain your perspective with dealing with men, try telephone chat lines where you can stay anonymous and still talk. Just hang up on the jerks and enjoy the real men. Keep the conversations light and non-personal. Who knows? Maybe you'll luck out and meet prince charming
Best of luck to you
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Old 09-21-2004, 01:51 PM   #7
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I had those days when I first got pregnant and the father of the child left me for another woman. But the first day I felt the baby move inside me,everything changed. Now I wish bad things upon the father,but I think that's just hormones....or maybe not. HAHA! (that was a joke....kind of. LOL )

I still have the feelings you are having about men. I think it's a mixture of hatred for what is happening to me,and some kind of motherly insistinct. It's no longer "hmm that guy looks good",it's "Hmm,I wonder if he likes children,has a steady job,is reliable" ect. But for the most part,I'm not even interested in men when I go out. I have more important things to do or think about. I've even freaked my friends out with how much I've changed just in the past few months alone. Everything I do now is about my child. I consider it a good thing.

Don't get me wrong,I still have my bad days. Only now it's just more of worrying about how I'm going to care for my child alone. I know everything will work out,it always has a way of doing that,but it's not strange to still be scared out of your mind.
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Old 10-03-2004, 02:01 PM   #8
i feel retarted
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Hey everyone I just wanted to say thanks for all your help and let you know how somethings are going now. I am four months along baby is doing great. I am seeing a counsler who is helping me deal w/my anger and depression. I got a job tending a two month old baby girl. so it will give lots of practice. I am gettin out of the house more w/my friends. I hardly ever think about the daddy and when i do its not so angry. My attitude about my baby is getting better. So i really am doing better. thanks again.
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Old 10-04-2004, 08:07 PM   #9
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Dear 'I Feel Retarded',
GLAD to read you are doing better! Once the baby's born you'll still have feelings that everyone around you is happy, but you know what, they have to SHARE their children whereas we get them all to ourselves!

Best of luck~
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Old 01-13-2005, 04:52 AM   #10
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Shout out from Utah...I'm in the neighborhood. I definetly want to say I know the feeling! My boyfriend(not to be confused with my babys' dad) Is a truck driver. If you ever want to chat, just drop me a line.
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