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Old 04-29-2006, 08:08 PM   #1
msmltvcktl
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I had posted on 20 something single moms, but I don't quite fit that category. I'm in a very scary situation right now; 7 mos pregnant, living on the street for the most part with NO family I can reach out to! Sure, my mom and stepfather live in the same state, less than 1 hr away, but they would NEVER open their home to me regardless of my situation. I have been seriously considering adoption for this child (my second. My son was given up for adoption and will be 8 this Sept.), but I'm not sure if I can go through with the emotional pain. I'm sort of beating myself up over this, since the popular opinion is that once you're in your late 20s (I'm 27) you should be able to take care of a child. But the father is sitting in jail right now, thanks to his inability to control his temper, and I doubt that we'll get back together. He has deep-seated issues that need serious attention. (and he's an abusive a-hole, but that's another story...) I don't think I'd be a good role model for a child, since both of my kids' fathers are jerks of the highest order. At least my son's father never hit me! I don't fancy the idea of giving up everything I've worked all these years for, i.e. my musical 'career'; this would be a non-issue if I had somebody, ANYBODY I could rely on. But giving up yet another child for adoption because I'm STILL homeless 8 yrs later, because I STILL have no relationship with my parents or extended family, because I couldn't get sterilised back when I was 18 and knew I didn't want children...

Has anyone else out there had to go through labour and delivery completely alone (other than hospital staff)? This is what I'm facing, and I don't think I can do it. Especially not if I have to see my friggin' roommate in the hospital being visited by family, friends, co-workers, etc.

-A
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Old 04-29-2006, 08:08 PM   #2
msmltvcktl
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I had posted on 20 something single moms, but I don't quite fit that category. I'm in a very scary situation right now; 7 mos pregnant, living on the street for the most part with NO family I can reach out to! Sure, my mom and stepfather live in the same state, less than 1 hr away, but they would NEVER open their home to me regardless of my situation. I have been seriously considering adoption for this child (my second. My son was given up for adoption and will be 8 this Sept.), but I'm not sure if I can go through with the emotional pain. I'm sort of beating myself up over this, since the popular opinion is that once you're in your late 20s (I'm 27) you should be able to take care of a child. But the father is sitting in jail right now, thanks to his inability to control his temper, and I doubt that we'll get back together. He has deep-seated issues that need serious attention. (and he's an abusive a-hole, but that's another story...) I don't think I'd be a good role model for a child, since both of my kids' fathers are jerks of the highest order. At least my son's father never hit me! I don't fancy the idea of giving up everything I've worked all these years for, i.e. my musical 'career'; this would be a non-issue if I had somebody, ANYBODY I could rely on. But giving up yet another child for adoption because I'm STILL homeless 8 yrs later, because I STILL have no relationship with my parents or extended family, because I couldn't get sterilised back when I was 18 and knew I didn't want children...

Has anyone else out there had to go through labour and delivery completely alone (other than hospital staff)? This is what I'm facing, and I don't think I can do it. Especially not if I have to see my friggin' roommate in the hospital being visited by family, friends, co-workers, etc.

-A
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Old 05-02-2006, 11:14 AM   #3
kimjoneli
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hi,i responded to your post in 20 somthing single moms, you must not have read it but i hope you do,it had a lot of infomation in it...go back and read it. anyway i'm feeling you,been ther done that.i'm pregant with my third child no longer homeless but with the second child i was alone with no one to help bring my child in the world but the hospital staff and i'm affrid i will be giving birth alone with this baby as well the father seems to send mixed messages and i don't feel he will be there for me in that time of need(o.k. enough of me) i do want you to feel free to cotact me or send a message to me anytime i'm feeling your pain about the whole situation including the no family thing,i'm still going through that alone.my words for you are you can do it,if i can any body can...just keep your faith and keep your head up,there is more help out there then you know :balloons:
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Old 05-02-2006, 04:06 PM   #4
tomany2count
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Definately sounds like it is time to get a hold of some resorces in your area. You can start with the office of children and Family or child protection. They should have most if not all the resources you will need.
If you definately do not want a child and are unable to care for one then I think adoption is a very honerable thing to do, although extremely difficult.
There are lots of people here who have been in your situation and lots of support.
God bless.
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